Thanks for the link to the bra charities. I shall try to send mine off.
However I now have the estate agent coming later this week so my mind is concentrating on house.
I went on a walk today by myself to suss out this new route in a familiar place. It took me four hours! It took me through streams to cross, gates to climb and bulls in a field. they look docile . My walking group won't like it.
It was a sunny day. Was it sunny where you are Lobstars?
Dear Doodle I am sorry that you've been brooding on the anniversary of that sad time.
I hope your bereavement group were able to help you through.
Please don't dream. 
I had forgotten to cancel my volunteer shift tomorrow and now I've been asked to stay an extra hour as my colleague is sick. So I'll miss a fun day at the seaside.
Never mind. I can go to the seaside when this house business calms down.
I planted potatoes this afternoon. I hope to sell my building plot/garden separately or not at all. I love my garden so much.
Thanks for that G&T. I enjoyed it.
Oh Doodle while its natural to think and mourn, its so very sad for you. Sending love and courage.
Gram I DO hope you get to the seaside with your friends soon. You are very noble to honour that previous commitment
I am so much looking forward to my day with the family tomorrow ans trying to sweep away the contrast which, when I come home again, is endless days alone, knitting.
I used to love living alone and on some levels still do but now I drop and knock thing all the time having lost my spacial wareness.
In the kitchen I am a danger to myself so generally feel totally useless.
All my regular home care ladies are, for one reason and another, not working. So I get 'reliefs' and am grateful for them but each time a new one comes we have to start from the beginning with what to do. Often they are from a culture which does not have that British reserve which curbs the tongue 
So ask very personal questions. If I did not know better I would feel it impertinent.
Add to all that the feeling of being a burden and this wretched, everlasting earache..
Can someone pop round and give me a darn good shaking until I see sense? 
.
Another sunny day but its getting chilly now.
Summer began early so we knew it would tail off into chilly mornings early too.
Before global warming, it was normal to have clement, even hot days well into June.
Oh Grammaretto
What a terrible day.
Thinking of you and your family
" When you are on your own things affect us more I think"
I agree. When its bad, you are marooned in a sea of your own sorrow.
When it's good you have no one to share it with.
Nevertheless, I can share with you
I had a wonderful time yesterday. All but my son were out and about for the first couple of hours so I was able to sit in the comfy kitchen and chat to him as he prepraed the meal.
And the robot vacuum cleaner (nicknamed Jolene) was scurrying round the room doing her job.
As probably befits an IT professional, DS2 has a smart house and a smart car.
Verbal comands are all it takes for any task to be accomplished in either.
I felt as if I'd just emerged from a Rip van Winkle dream to find myself in the future - slightly unsettling.
On the way home, I was filled with a sense of impending loneliness and fought the tears by chattering.
I don't mind living alone, in fact I prefer it but the contrast between such a happy, lively day with the grandchildren and their parents took a lot of self-control. I'm fine now.
Another sunny day and ideal for drying laundry, so I must get that out of the w/machine onto my covered deck.
I guess if the churches can still be used it saves them from being sold out of community use.
One near us has become a training centre for people working at heights.
Another Church of Scotland has had all its pews replaced with stacking seats and is still used for services but also concerts and in a couple of weeks, it's a polling station.
I was on another long walk this morning which lifted my spirits somewhat.
It was sunny. The Cuckoo flower was blooming.
Kaimoana it does sound very unlike you to be surrounded by all this space age technology! I hope you aren't too sad going home to be on your own again.
Did you manage to speak about your needs to DS?
The mushrooms are Saint George's mushrooms, delicious at this time of year.
Yes indeed, it was hard coming back to an empty house but I managed to keep my tears to myself until DS left.
I stayed up knitting until it all felt normal again and was able to then sleep in relative peace.
I asked google the distance between our homes and kept getting different results! 
It's about 40 miles, so a round trip journey is, by NZ standards at least, a long one - and with petrol at an historical high, pricey.
Still, my son feels I'm worth it!
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