Aladdin and his Ugly Sisters, aided and abetted by cows, dragons, and many other dodgy characters. Oh yes and a sprinkling of fairy dust"

I'm on the edge of my seat !

The band is playing for your enjoyment whilst we wait for the cast to finish their tea (what a shower)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9ZQWfOZ0_k

Ices, ices buy your ice creams here. Oops sorry. (Don't worry I'm wearing both my pairs of charcoal knickers) Oops sorry again...
Ices, buy your ices...

Has anyone tested our winch ( for the rather tubby fairies to swoop in) no last minute hitches.

Hurry up! The audience is getting restless!

Principal Boy:

Come here Dragon - where have you been? I am a Prince and I expect you to be by my side at all times. Find out where that strange odour of charcoal is coming from. I find it most unpleasant. Go now and do my bidding.

Woof oh sorry meow!

Sorry I'm late dahlings, had to pop into Sainroseco's for some plonk. Anyone fancy a drop of to get us in the moos, sorry, mood? I've opened it now anyway so we'll have to drink it before it evaporates ...

Where would you like me to send the sawdust, I have several giant bags of it.

Oh, sorry, you want fairy dust - shame, thought I had found a home for it.

Did someone mention fairies? A couple of them, sprinkled with lots of glitty dust would go down very well in a breakfast sarnie - they'd certainly make a change from boring, bony, munchkins. Pass the mint sauce someone.... HEE HEE HEE WHOOOOOSSHH

Enter stg right -- Evil Barron hardup. dressed in his favorite pink lererhosen.

(Audience boos)

"Shut up you miserable lot of crones" "Has anyone seen that Wishy Washy, she owes me a months rent on that shed I rent her, if she can't pay, I will have to take Hanky Panky to work on my farm."

What's that awful smell, smells like cow S..... Don't they know about charcoal Tu Tus.

Exits stg lft to more boos.

Can the band play a bit more slowly please? We can't keep up!

Where's ann? Ah, checking the winch after that Wicked Witch of the West used it. I know my glamorous granny sister can't stay too long so can we run through our song now please stage manager?
Oh nobody loves a fairy when she's forty
Nobody loves a fairy when she's old
Hic! Oh 'scuse me, think I've eaten too many charcoal flavoured ice creams, must dash ...

Enter one of Aladdin's ugly sisters.

Aladdin, Look out here comes ugly mug.

Sister. I'm not ugly, I'm elegant. Appeals to audience.

I'm elegant aren't I.

Audience: Oh yes you are.

Aladdin - Oh no she's not. etc., .......

Hanky Panky enters stage left.

Hello every one, has anyone seen my mum, Wishy Washy -- That horrid barron is trying to get her to pay for that old shed we live in, it's not fit for habitation, if the H&S officer sees it he will comdem it, but we won't have anywhere to live then. Must find her to warn her, If you see her, shout out HANKY PANKY as loud as you can. I'm collecting all this cow s.... for my bean plant, I'm sure if I could find some hotter s.... it would grow even faster.
BYe BYE

Oops sorry again. Oh well better out than in. Oh dear. Think I'll have to return these charcoal pants they seem to be broken.

Sorry Swanny we were enjoying our meal and time flew, however I am not sure my costume will fasten up at the back now. Nil desperandum I will lose it all by opening night. Ah the smell of the greasepaint, the roar of the crowds.... We do have crowds don't we? It is usually OAP's in free for the dress rehearsal isn't it? All the GNers who chickened out of performing.

I think they all went home when the ice cream ran out! ☹️

Us lot didn't chicken out of performing! We're off to our Zimmers rehearsal, we're doing Jump Up and Down, Wave Your Knickers in the Air (not you, Swanny).

Can I just wave my knickers? I can't jump up and down at the mo!

I've taken mine off. Oh the relief!

I think Wobblybits has left us.

Jeez ..... Or rather mooooo. I have only just got back from a milkin' . Soorly carnt be spected to puform wiv afulludda .