SW can work for some people. It worked for my stepdaughter - in the last 3 years she's lost another person's weight, approx what her very slim sister-in-law weighed to start with! So, she's effectively halved her weight. However she tried to explain it to me and I couldn't get my head around it. It was the companionship, a group of new friends that she wouldn't have met otherwise, the mutual support, which helped at a difficult time of her life - redundancy/marriage breakdown.
From my background in behavioural sciences, and what I've seen/heard/read, I really do think that a lot of the problem is in our heads. By that I mean, way back in the past someone encouraged us to regard 'food and wine', as you say, as a 'treat'. There are always going to be difficulties in life. No one ever said it was going to be a rose garden from start to finish. Did you by chance see 'Big Body Squad' recently where there was a man who dated all his weight gain from his father's death 10 years earlier? And yet that's the kind of thing, death of parents, that we can all expect to happen to all of us! Is it a reason for eating your way into an early grave, doubling or tripling your weight?
Some people can eat even when they're not hungry. They 'have to' eat all that's on their plate even when their physiology tells them they've eaten enough. They've managed to - somehow - over-ride normal biology. Again, this may be learned behaviour - they were told long ago to 'eat it all up'.
I'm lucky. When I'm full, I'm full. I stop. That's it. I don't eat according to time of day/happy/unhappy/to please other people/as a treat (well, rarely). I'm also as active as I can be - aqua-aerobics a couple of times a week, pottering in and out of the garden, don't sit still for too long. I shouldn't have a problem, but I still find weight creeps on when I don't want it to.