Home schooling

Sorry to hear you hated school and being 'under the thumb' - but golly things have changed. It is truly possible, for most children- to have both a good academic education and lots of fun, sport, art, music, creativity, etc- and the comprehensive system 'delivered' that brilliantly for our children- and now for our grand-children.

I did a degree in social science and a post grad diploma in social work and became a medical social worker, then a photographer, arts outreach worker, singing workshop co-oordinator, vocal conductor, magazine picture editor......etc. A complicated question for a complicated career.

I am passionately interested in education as I hated my own and had concerns about my children's. I try to make a contribution as a school governor and have been successful in helping to initiate changes that have broadened the scope of what the children are offered.

My education gave me the bits of paper to go to uni - but the cost was too high in terms of personal development and happiness. I sometimes feel very sad about those wasted years when I was fit and enthusiastic but under the thumb. I want better for our children.

I do not expect perfection - children have to learn that life is not perfect and accepting that is part of a balanced and happy adult life, but I think we need a lot of changes to give teachers back their freedom and self-respect and to do right by our children.

I suppose I should add that I suppose it depends on home life too.

It might depend on there being supportive people on hand to talk through any troubles at school, or any issues that a child may have heard that made them feel uncomfortable there?

I think that a child needs both the regimentation, and the home freedom.

Can I ask what job you did after leaving school Mishap?

I agree that to a certain extent, there is tight criteria.
But I also think that pupils gain so much by being with much of the human race.

Every child is an individual and responds in their own unique way to both teaching and learning. With hindsight I realise that one of my older daughters would have benefited more from home education than the traditional schooling that she had, but she nevertheless fulfilled her potential eventually and went on to gain a first class honours degree whilst working full time. My eldest son did brilliantly at school and it was certainly the right place for him to get a good education as he too went on to get the same class of degree as his sister. As parents and grandparents we all (hopefully) want to do our best for the children in our care and it won't always be the same for each child.

That is another story! It doesn't take away from the fact that teachers don't want sheep! Everyone seems to manage to buck the trend and come out as individuals - very much so.

Under our current circumscribed system I am not sure that the "quirky, questioning creative minds" that are so satisfying to teach do get a good deal in school. I think this is why so many teachers are stressed and disillusioned - their creativity in responding to these youngsters is limited by tight criteria, curricula and the emphasis on statistics and data - and paperwork by the bucketload!

Neither do I think that the children in school become sheep - but they do have to fit in to these tight criteria and the peculiar environment of so many young people thrown together in large comprehensives. I am not sure this is a good thing and would like to see much smaller human-scale schools. I know that there are economies of scale by having large schools but I remain unconvinced that this is good for either staff or pupils.

I remember my school days in a large grammar school - I had no problem with the work, but hated the regimentation and my life felt stultified. It felt like a waste of what I had to offer and of my youth. Looking back, it was a very bleak time.

I wasn't commenting on not having faith in your children- merely the worry that they can't be individuals in school. I have faith that every child can be an individual in school. It is what every teacher wants and goes into the job for- I would be terribly boring teaching them if they were sheep like and accepted things without question. It is the quirky, questioning, creative minds that make the job worthwhile and interesting.

I was not commenting on you in particular rubylady - sorry if you thought that. It is just a fact that it always makes me smile when people think children who go to school enter a sausage factory, act as sheep, or can't be individual. They are exactly the same as home schooled children- their own quirky, individual selves. Home educate for whatever reason you like, but not because you fear you might relegate them to being sheep if you leave them at school- it simply won't happen!
I can't tell the difference between a home educated or schooled child once they are adults - although sometimes you can when children. The home educated ones can be more precocious, depending on personality. ( but that is only an observation from the ones that I know personally.

leticia Have you home schooled your own children?

If not, then please do not comment on my situation as you know nothing about it.

Please don't just post on here to antagonise others as this does not go down well and only causes tension when none is needed.

I have great faith in my children, one already went onto University, graduated 8 years ago and now works as a Youth Centre Manager and my son is doing his A levels to go onto University to become a Paramedic.

Answer posts by all means but do not put me or my children down by insinuating that I have no faith in them!

leticia

Although the school gets extra money for teaching a child with a statement, the money does not follow the child when homeschooled.
It can be quite expensive, with all the trips out and materials.

I have just finished the first year of home schooling with my grandson, aged 13 next month.
I teach him three days and his mother the other two.
We do this because the school he was at made him so anxious that he was like the white rabbit, being afraid that he was always late for the next lesson.
He goes for 10k runs twice a week with his mother, and plays in a football team twice a week, which he was not getting at school.

The thing about home schooling is that you can teach at the child's pace. He was supposed to have one-to-one help at school but never got it in the high school.

Maths, he has just been multiplying two decimal places by two decimal places. He can also divide decimals by decimals, although I have no idea why he will need it. He can look at my shopping bill and work out percentage discounts for me, which could come in handy when deciding which computer games are best value.
He has decided what job he is going to do, and discovered what qualifications he needs to get an apprenticeship when he is 16.
He reads voraciously now, having discovered the books he enjoys, and we are making our own dictionary. He studies history, geography, science, bakes bread and pastry, learns lots of things that will be practically useful.

Crafting, my grandson has had a statement since he was four, as he has ASD. Last week I took him to the DLI museum, and he did printing for the first time. He concentrated for nearly three hours on one thing, even though he was asking if it would take longer than twenty minutes when we went in.

You will find once you start thinking about it, that you have lots of resources available.

We used a programme called www.uk.ixl to start with, but realised it was just testing. There is a programme called www.topmarks.co.uk with lots of ideas and worksheets, all graded and with lots of links to other programmes.
The important thing to do is to let the school and the local authority know, send them a plan, and keep a diary in case anyone comes to check up.

The situation with CAMHS is becoming critical. One branch to whom my young relative was referred only had secretarial staff there - no psychiatrist no CPNs or SWs - nowt. So what is the point of making a referral? Some CAMHS are owned by Virgin for goodness' sake.

The Ed Psych assessed this child, but the school could not supply what was needed, so that was that. He went without. Really - it seems unlikely, but that was how it was. There was a very great deal of assessing going on, but no actual provision.

I am afraid that your family will have to fight. I can understand how frustrating and tiring it must be for the parents. They must value your support.

If it is any consolation, things have been a bit better after the age of 16 - colleges seem to be more open-minded about their students - more relaxed and accommodating of quirks and problems, less quick to judge and label, and more able to put in the right support.

Thank you Mishap and Penstemmon for your kind thoughts. Yes DGC has been assessed and does have many needs but still no help being provided. Referred to CAMHS over 12 months ago but still not been seen by them as their services are so overstretched. Parents doing everything they can and exploring every avenue for their much loved child.

Crafting sorry to hear abut your DGC. What stage of education are they at and have they had any assessment of the specific learning needs? There will be various support groups that you /the family could tap into for particular needs as well as the more generic home education organisations.

Good luck and I hope the family gets the support they need to help your DGC to learn, develop & make progress emotionally as well as in learning.

Commiserations Crafting - I too have experience of how a child with special needs can be spectacularly let down by education authorities and CAMHS. A family member finished up doing more education at home than at school simply because the special help required was not forthcoming. And the mother in this situation has worn herself out over many years of banging her head against a brick wall trying to get the right help and education. The CAMHS system seems to be in disarray - whenever I hear anything about it is is sadly always negative. Such a shame, as help early can set a child on the right road.

There are also children that the schools, Education Authorities, CAMHS etc have let down. My DGC being one of them. Parents have been fighting to get help for over 12 months and apart from a couple of phone calls saying your on our list they have had nothing that they haven't had to pay for themselves. They would love DGC to go to school but as the school have no resources available to help the poor child is left to cope alone. It has been a nightmare of a year and everyone concerned is exhausted with the worry.

There are parents who do not want to 'manage their behaviour' - it is against their parenting philosophies.

Mishap I do know kids who have had a good time being home educated and done well. Sadly there is a growing number of youngsters not getting any sort of education because their parents do not always have the skills to manage their behaviour. It is a sorry situation.

I think that everyone should have the right to home educate but they should be registered and they should have to be inspected regularly.

Just Googled 'home education and neglect' and have been amazed at the number of really worrying articles that came up. An (tragic) eye opener.

I guess that it is unlikely that the majority of parents would choose to home educate, so that is not a very likely scenario, but I do think it is right that the option should be there.

It sounds as though the parents that your OH has visited are using the smoke screen of home education to justify their CBA attitude - a great shame.

I think my aim in this thread was to reassure the OP that it can be done well and that there is support out there, not necessarily through the over subscribed LA, but through organisations like EO and the networks of home educators that exist.

Yes, it is difficult to imagine- that some parents feed their kids cr** day in, day out, beat them, ignore them, and worse. That does not mean it does not happen.

The cost of properly supporting homeschooling would be massive, and tot he detriment of all the other childrens' education.

Thank you Penstemmon for saying as it too often (tragically) is. I used to teach in comprehensives with some very 'challenging' families- who took kids out of school who ended up in such a mess, half in bed, half on the street selling (and taking drugs) etc. Hence my use of the word 'abuse' earlier.