I saw the writing on the wall

Thank you for your replies it does give some comfort to me knowing that I have somewhere to talk about my pain.
I have read so many stories here and on other sites and came to the realisation quite some time ago that I couldn’t fight it but now I have gone out with a bang.
I knew any fight would be pointless especially when I heard from a close person that son and his fiancé had looked on the internet to see if l could have caused a 4 week pregnancy to end. I was shocked at this lack of intelligence by a young woman who already has a child and feeling that she wanted the answer to be yes. My son wouldn’t have a clue but I feel angry at him for being so cruel and going along with her extreme exaggeration in order to make me a bad person.
My daughter noted her snappy behaviour towards me two years ago when I wasn’t even aware of it. It just increased over time.

I find these stories so sad and normally someone comes along with “yes but there’s two sides to every story”. No there isn’t.

I am sorry you’re going through this OP. It’s a strange fact that some people are very jealous and insecure. Some DIL’S want to estrange their partners from their mothers as it gives them more control. Conversely, with men, they are called dominating and controlling but it’s the same mindset - far easier to have someone under your thumb if they have nobody else to turn to.

I think you’ve done the right thing and you shouldn’t have to put up with such injustice to keep the peace. It’s sad but, hopefully, one day your son will come to realise he was wrong.

Take care of yourself and live your best life

In a case like yours Nicegranny, even when we know that our gut instincts are right, we ignore them because what they're telling us is something we simply don't want to have to face.

It's so hard to accept that our AC can be controlled in this coercive way. That s/he can fail to see what's going on and believe the lies they're told about the parent(s) who have loved them their entire lives.

Our ES was already married when she showed her true colours and that didn't begin to happen until she became pregnant. Until then we truly believed we had a good relationship, we genuinely loved her!!!

We've lost the son we adored and our only GC and despite the heart break I know we're better out of it.

I hope your son sees her for what she is and comes back to you. .

Sometimes it amazes me what peoples partners are like and how they get away with murder. Your son seems to be trying to appease her so they dont end up rowing or he gets nagged. I think at the moment you are doing the right thing by staying away. You cant win because as you say she twists everything and makes you look like the bad person. I know it hurts but Im sure your son will one day see through her and realise what a lovely mum you are. Wishing you better times.

Smileless I had mentioned this before but I stupidly didn’t listen to my gut instinct. I let her get away with my son forcing me to apologise when it was her that was mean to me but I exploded at the weekend and now we are done. There’s more to the story but lm still so upset about it l can’t even think straight. Thank you for confirming that I probably did do the right thing. These young women that lie like that deserve to have the same thing happen to them. I hope my son follows his instincts and decides not to marry her. She was such a fast worker.

Hi Nicegranny; don't worry you're not posting in the wrong place.

I can see from your OP why you've decided to take a step back and remove yourself from a difficult and upsetting situation which sadly has the potential to deteriorate even further.

TBH I wished I'd had your for sight, and not been in the company of our ES's wife without him being there or even had telephone conversations with her, without him listening in.

For what it's worth, I think you have done the right thing. It's always going to be possible for your son to stay in contact with you without her involvement if that's what he wants.

I hope he does.

Thank you ladies. I’ve been hurting for months now I have lost it.

I’m sorry to hear what’s happened.
But things can turn on a sixpence.
And nothing is set in stone. Fingers crossed that things get better for you. Look after yourself ?

You are not in the wrong place nice granny.
I am sorry about the difficult situation with your son and hope it resolves.
I am sure someone will be along soon to help.

Please don’t tell me lm posting in the wrong place.