Gransnet forums

Estrangement

Sign for grandchildren

(486 Posts)
Minty Sat 18-Dec-21 17:25:19

There is a new petition that has been launched today which you might like to support.
chng.it/PhGdn2Swry

Smileless2012 Sat 18-Dec-21 21:13:29

Preventing children from seeing GP's they have formed a loving relationship with is bringing them into the equation isn't it.

MissAdventure Sat 18-Dec-21 21:15:22

I think the "my child. My rules" model has been shown to have some very major flaws these last few weeks.
It's no longer good enough or acceptable to withhold access out NON ABUSIVE relatives.

VioletSky Sat 18-Dec-21 21:15:52

As I said, it will not be children enforcing these rights.

So call it what you will, it amounts to the same thing.

Grandparents getting easier access to grandchildren.

MissAdventure Sat 18-Dec-21 21:16:49

Sign it, don't sign it.
It's that simple.

Smileless2012 Sat 18-Dec-21 21:18:52

I agree MissA and sadly withholding access im many cases has nothing to do with protecting children from abuse.

Granniesunite Sat 18-Dec-21 21:20:08

Children are being used as pawns in some cases and being emotionally abused by either one or two parents in others.
It’s in the Childs interest surely to have an independent party investigate what’s good for the child. There’s a generation of children that are being used in this way. It’s time they were heard.

VioletSky Sat 18-Dec-21 21:20:48

Sorry MissA

This matters to me and others with abusive parents and I can't just let the can of worms spill everywhere

If there is an opposing decision I would not expect people to sign or not sign and stay silent

VioletSky Sat 18-Dec-21 21:21:06

Opposing petition that should say

MissAdventure Sat 18-Dec-21 21:23:01

My neighbours grandchildren have always wanted to see her, and it is always her that social services bring them to when the next crisis hits (despite them being instrumental in getting her stopped from accessing them)

She is the only non violent, clean living member of a large family, and yet she was threatened off by the police.

Granniesunite Sat 18-Dec-21 21:23:29

It’s also a way of investigating abusive grandparents too

Smileless2012 Sat 18-Dec-21 21:24:23

Well, this matters to me for all the GC and GP's who are being deprived of the relationship they had. It wont make any difference to our situation but may help others.

You give your support by signing and don't give your support by not signing. As you say MissA "It's that simple".

MissAdventure Sat 18-Dec-21 21:24:40

It matters to everyone, I'm sure, violet.
Whatever their personal circumstances.
For some it is a matter of life or death.

Granniesunite Sat 18-Dec-21 21:25:15

The whole system needs looked at.

Smileless2012 Sat 18-Dec-21 21:26:58

Yes it does Granniesunite for the emotional and physical welfare of all children.

VioletSky Sat 18-Dec-21 21:30:55

Right, but I'm nit trying to take away anyone else's right to express their views.

Rights either matter or they don't.

Decide.

I would support children to have more means and education on how to enforce their own rights.

I cannot and will not support adults having more power to fight over them.

MissAdventure Sat 18-Dec-21 21:31:25

So don't sign then.

Granniesunite Sat 18-Dec-21 21:33:07

Surely if you had abusive parent /grandparents you’d welcome the opportunity to expose them in a court of law. And be vindicated for estranging them in the first place.

I’d willing stand in a court answering questions about my situation. In fact I’d welcome it.

Granniesunite Sat 18-Dec-21 21:34:33

It’s not a case of more power over children at all it’s about the children seeing and having a relationship with family that love and care for them.

Peasblossom Sat 18-Dec-21 21:35:43

Can I ask.

If the Children’s Act was changed to give children the right to continue a relationship with grandparents would that mean that parents would have to go to court to prove that the relationship was damaging.

And in the meantime would grandparents and children continue to have unsupervised contact with each other. Even if the parents thought it was not safe or was not good for the child.

Although the principle of family contact may be good, actually the practice has some major concerns.

VioletSky Sat 18-Dec-21 21:36:19

Granniesunite

Surely if you had abusive parent /grandparents you’d welcome the opportunity to expose them in a court of law. And be vindicated for estranging them in the first place.

I’d willing stand in a court answering questions about my situation. In fact I’d welcome it.

My mother used my sexual abuse to emotionally abuse me further.

That is one example of her emotional abuse.

Now tell me how I prove it.

MissAdventure Sat 18-Dec-21 21:38:31

I don't think contact should be unsupervised when there is a question mark about the suitability of the person with access.
Again, my neighbour has spent many an hour in supervised access.

Iam64 Sat 18-Dec-21 21:39:37

I won’t sign this. Family breakdown won’t be prevented or cured by a focus on ‘grandparents’ rights.
I’d support investment in mediation services to support family relationships. They could be available to parents locked into long conflicts on residence and contact as well as grandparents. If there is a history of abuse, mediation isn’t appropriate

Granniesunite Sat 18-Dec-21 21:40:24

I’d be happy to wait till the court have investigated the grandparents and made their desk on.

We could go on for hours finding faults on both side with this and in the meantime children are conflicted and unhappy .

Dogs trust can make descions fairly quickly about trust suitability ect surely the brains that sit in our courts could do the same.

Granniesunite Sat 18-Dec-21 21:41:09

VioletSky

Granniesunite

Surely if you had abusive parent /grandparents you’d welcome the opportunity to expose them in a court of law. And be vindicated for estranging them in the first place.

I’d willing stand in a court answering questions about my situation. In fact I’d welcome it.

My mother used my sexual abuse to emotionally abuse me further.

That is one example of her emotional abuse.

Now tell me how I prove it.

It’s been proven now. Watch the news,

VioletSky Sat 18-Dec-21 21:42:37

Again, how do I prove my mother emotionally abusive?

She is abusive, if abusers couldn't hide it they wouldnt get away with it.