Putting myself on the chopping block ...

No, ok then.
We won't get you started.

There are people saying you can't verify the story with only one side. But we only have one side of their story and we need to accept it fully or we are being nasty. Hypocrisy.

People are saying that posting here means we aren't healed. If we have a problem don't come here. Yet you are posting here and clearly have a problem. Hypocrisy.

People condemning others for posting about their interactions here in other places. Those people comment about their interactions with us on other threads. Hypocrisy.

Don't get me starting on trashing therapy and then immediately claiming no one ever did that. Or opening ripping into people and claiming you've literally never done that.

You are only fooling yourselves. You aren't hurt or bothered by this post. You just want to make other people feel bad. And you want sympathy and support when a stranger vents about you on another anonymous forum.

It's like watching a child break something right in front of you then repeatedly argue that they didn't do it.

We saw you do it.

Well yes; job done.

maybe they do regularly watch and back each other on other sites.

Any road up.
The person has estranged her mum in law, nobody wants to argue about it - why would they?
So, least said, soonest mended, I think.

Well they do say "I love gransnet, I love putting them in their place" so...

Unless they regularly all go to watch and back each other on other sites, I'd say it's likely.

One of the screen shots read "I love Gransnet it brings me joy
I love putting them in their place"

I'm not sure how much more it could be related to GN NotSpaghetti.

I did access the link provided by IHateHypocrites almost immediately while it was still accessible. It was damning in terms of the OP's motivation, aka Girlmom behind this thread which would explain why shortly afterwards and ever since, it can no longer be viewed.

Do you think it could be a question of 'who blinks first' MissA

The last (selected) screenshot shown by IHateHypocrites was a month ago.

Do we even know that it was related to Gransnet?

I think this is just continued goading, until it results in the "required" response.
Flogging a dead horse, if you like.

The thing is, as the other thread (on the other site) was 3 months old it can't (at least initially) be directly rrlated to this thread on Gransnet. It is much older than this thread... I don't feel I have the whole picture tbh Smileless2012.

I feel that any responsibility lies with those responsible VS. Do you feel in anyway responsible for what the OP sought to do here?

Well it looks like that's another question that wont be answered MissA, just like the ones I asked VS on the previous page.

No more that EP's, EGP's and m's.i.l. are maxiepants.

I have not seen an EAC greeted with suspicion and sometimes aggression on gransnet. I have seen them responded too harshly but not because they are EAC but because of what they have posted.

I wouldn't say that mamasperspective original post wasn't made with good intentions but it's blatantly obvious that this one wasn't.

I can see that you are not defending her behaviour on this thread, but neither are you condemning it and neither is VS. It doesn't take much imagination though to imagine the response from EAC had this been done by an EP/EGP/m.i.l.

What good can come from goading people you don't know and have never met? If the OP still has unresolved issues with her m.i.l. then she should address them to her.

As I posted earlier, I honestly believe that anyone who does something like this because they think it may help them, and anyone seeing and encouraging this type of behaviour who believes it offers them as a member of the audience support, is clearly not receiving the type of support they need.

You're free to respond to it any way you like, MissAdventure

Why should anyone put up with goading whether its by proxy or not?

Particularly when it is being viewed and cackled over elsewhere.

As has been mentioned, this is a public forum and anybody can access it and share posts from it. I found out about gransnet from reddit, for example. It's hardly surprising that people embroiled in an estrangement situation or difficult relationship, from whichever side of the fence, go looking for information about similar situations. I'd guess that most people find those of like minds and stick with them, but some of us are curious about the other perspective.

Not to defend Mamasperspective's comments on the other forum about goading the gransnet users, but EACs are greeted with suspicion and sometimes aggression on gransnet. You may not think so, but then you're talking from the other side of the fence with the comfort of your fellow EPs and EGPs surrounding you.

Why would an EAC come to a forum so hostile to them? Like I said, curiosity is a factor. I don't doubt Mamasperspective started out with good intentions, genuinely wanting to understand her MIL by getting insight from estranged mothers/GPs/MILs. I also have no doubt that she got more than she bargained for and probably has a pretty dim view of many of the estranged grandmothers she's encountered here. And who knows... maybe goading you is a way to get back at her MIL by proxy. Again - not defending this, but I do understand the impulse.

The date orders are correct, support was sought before the OP reacted elsewhere to the comments she got here..

So there is no question...

Someone came here, got some unkind comments, didn't deal with it as well as she could have

Again as a long term poster I feel the responsibility lies with us

I honestly think that if anyone on a support website regards this sort of behaviour as supportive, they are not receiving the support they need, and I do not say that unkindly.

It didn't sound "trite" NotSpaghetti and the are appreciated .

I had my doubts about this thread and the first time the OP posted about her m.i.l. A m.i.l. who takes her GC out of their mother's arms, holds on to them for hours and refuses to give them back. A m.i.l. who on I think four separate occasions feeds her very young GC chocolate despite being told that doing so causes pain and distress.

Yes, I had my doubts but responded and not unkindly as did DL and others.

The OP may or may not be fake, may or may not be grossly exaggerated but the OP's claim that she was posting to give a d's.i.l. perspective and to open up communication between an estranged m.i.l. and estranged parents, GP's and m's.i.l. was fake.

What do you think about her intention to put the estranged on this forum in their place VS? About garnering support for her posts here on GN from another site, in case she received the "tirade of abuse" she was expecting? About one of the responders talking about eating popcorn as they read what they were hoping to see.

How would you feel VS if an EP, EGP and/or m.i.l. had attempted to do to those who have estranged what the OP had attempted to do to the estranged posters on this forum? Would you defend that too?

Only the other day I saw a post exclaiming that no one walks away from a healthy family. The estranged on this forum knows what that means every time they see that or similar. They know that when they say they did nothing wrong, they're not believed, they are being fake and worse. Why isn't that unacceptable? Why isn't that taken into account when it's a new poster.

Those who have been estranged have left GN because of the responses they've received but I've never seen one pull a stunt like this.

The OP's experience isn't the only thing that's been discussed on the other support website is it, and that is the issue here.

Just read my post back - was not trying to sound smug or trying to belittle with the

Sometimes what we type is easy to interpret differently.
Apologies if it sounded trite!

Yes, The situation is not fake
It has been spoken about here and the other support website

And Violet, on this website some time ago when the mum came for support and a grandparent's view.

It will surely be horrendous to be living through estrangement whether as the person being estranged or the person feeling they must do it.

I confess to not having lived this particular pain but I think both "sides" need sympathy (and empathy if possible).

to everyone struggling.

The situation is not fake

It has been spoken about here and the other support website

There is nothing justification for taking it at least than face value

I don’t think fake, made up posts, to apparently bait people, are helpful or positive for anyone. Whatever side of the debate.🤷‍♀️

I am personally always more interested and invested in this being a positive welcoming space for anyone touched by estrangement