Adoption

Speaking from experience, in 18 years all the hard work and relationship building will be over. When you connect you will be connecting with an adult who has never know you. It will be hard.

Grandparents are the people we love, and they love us when we are children. It is different when we are grown. Once we meet the bio family there may be a flurry of excitement, but then it wains when you realize that they are really just strangers that you share DNA with.

An added complication is that when you meet your bio family you realize there are other children who grew up in those households and the family dynamics, religion, morals, are very different than the way you were raise. Again, nothing in common.

Adoptions are hard decisions to make, but generally a better option for the child than the alternative. This is about your daughter and what she wants and needs at this time. Later on, it will be all about the adult adoptee and what their wants and needs are. I am sorry to say that it will never be about you. There just isn't space for that.

Last I checked, grandparents do not have any rights. At least where I am from. I am sure that you are truly heartsick.

I am so sorry. I know you feel heartsick, but you and everyone else involved will have to live with this and just hope that the adopting family is wonderful, well-adjusted and happy to have the child in the family.