Guardian article - i never want you around your grandchild

I think feeling angry is a normal emotion though

I think most posters ignore these posts. They are presumably posted to cause a reaction. I don’t know. They were deleted when I came on.

Yes, I think it would be far easier for those of us who are only seeing the reactions rather than what was deleted. I tend to have a read with a cup of tea a few times a day and still manage to miss them all so I wonder if some of the reactions are reactions to reactions and causing a bit of a snowball. Best ignored. Apologies for adding to it further, it is just that things are getting harder to understand and follow with comments not on topic.

The deletions were links to a reddit thread,which contained copy and pasted posts from users on here, and what the reddit users thought of them.

Thoroughly spiteful, and has been done before, by "new" users here.

I don't even know what reddit is

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Talk about shit stirring. Violetsky hasn't even posted on this thread
I'm an EAC too and Smileless has been kind to me.

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How would your abuse not have happened if we had " been kind " to Violet Sky ???

where is violetsky anyway?

I'm glad that you have no regrets for estranging your mother but have no idea why you've introduced the name of a recently banned poster into the discussion, or perhaps I do .

AstralProjections, VioletSky and the name under which she was first banned Starblaze; could that be a clue?

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Are you violets army of protectors?
I don't think so.

I read the article earlier and thought it was sad. There are so many different experiences coming under the same tales of unhappiness on both sides and lack of communication and hurt feelings.

I always think that a sense of history is missing and the damage that is done by wars, invasions and occupation by foreign powers or fear of all these.

Just taking the 20th century, there were two World Wars, huge shifts in the social order, mass unemployment, economic crashes, revolution, massacres and genocide, women gaining the vote but not having access to birth control or abortion and so on. So many changes in such a short time and causing so much bitterness, neediness and neediness.

What's the betting that Syria, Ukraine, Gaza and Lebanon are all creating their share of desperate people who are unkind or worse to their families. I used to resent my mother until I realised what she had lived through from 1915 to 1977 and when I really looked at it, I felt grateful that she did her best as a child and adult of her time. None of us are perfect and memory is not fact.

Why aren't you people spending time with your wonderful children, and marvellous husbands, having healthy interactions??

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Good question MissA. If their lives are better, healthier and happier without the ones they've estranged, why are they so angry and bitter?

AllKindsOfSorts

I don't get to have those healthy interactions because my parent fucked me up beyond most repair doing "the best she could"

She certainly did.

So if you're married with children of your own AllKindOfSorts are you unable to spend time with your own children and husband having healthy interactions?

That's so sad .

Why aren't you people spending time with your wonderful children, and marvellous husbands, having healthy interactions??

Because they're angry and bitter and need to lash out at someone. They've likely screwed up their relationship with their parents, probably siblings too and have nowhere else to vent their misery. The fact that they pore over every estrangement thread, looking for any post that they perceive to be less than 100% supportive of adults estranging their parents and ripping it to shreds. Their sheer unresolved anger, frustration and misery must be all consuming, and thoroughly exhausting, and I can only pity them that they can't find a more constructive way to help themselves. It must be hell inside their head.

I think I will spend my time on other subjects until these become a little more on topic

Grunty
It would be hell for normal people but some are wired differently. The pity is: they don’t know it, it’s always somebody else’s fault.

Unhappily, you always get some “stir it up trolls” on sites like this.

Sad people, best ignored. 🙄

Babs03

I agree Smileless, EACs who want a mature and balanced debate about what happened in their case will be put off by the immature and abusive EACs who come on her causing mischief. And it also makes it harder for EPs to come on here when they read such nasty posts. Both need a sympathetic and sensitive hearing, not to be subjected to the invective of posters whose aim is far from being either.

Exactly this!

Height of rudeness and immaturity!

Your post Luminance was a balanced viewpoint and pretty nigh perfect I think as an assessment of generational evaluations. What happened in the past can’t be altered of course but loving communications might help heal wounds and behaviours reset perhaps for future relationships.

I’ve (fortunately) no experience of family estrangement so what do I know? Nothing really. But communication must be key if possible before positions become intransigent and feelings hurt beyond repair.