Support and friendship for those whose lives have been affected by estrangement.

Yogin and Whiff thank you for liking my Rowan.

Sparkly I had a beautiful Rowan, unfortunately it grew too much for its position, we had inherited it when we moved in and was sad to see go. You have to think 20 years hence will it be in the right place. Mind you if I planted one now it wouldn't be my problem in 20 years.
Smileless, it must be worrying knowing your capable adventurous son hurt himself. When he is out on these hikes and rides has he some device where he could summon help or is it all on the phone now?
Whiff, I think one poster is really three and in a very fragile mental state. Looking for some where to voice all their angst and frustrations. We are an easy target. There is difficulty getting help with a lot of mental health problems. Engaging with them as I do sometimes if they attack a new poster and frighten them off, is futile and I know that, they want their platform and do not think of who they hurt.
My down sizing is going well, but I can’t believe I have got rid of six bags of clothes, nice ones that just don’t suit me or just uncomfortable as I have expanded a little, its much nicer just looking at my two remaining wardrobes just clothes I do wear, I was going to buy a new dress Saturday and at the last minute at the till resisted.
Next its ornaments, the ones I had as presents but do not like so they are in cupboards, already done unwanted kitchen gadgets. I have to look at is as my donation to charity as I feel so guilty doing it, especially my twice used food mixer with gadgets, ice cream maker, coffee machine. All gone and lots of space.

He always his has 'phone in him Allsorts but that could get damaged in a bad fall couldn't it so I do the 'nagging mum bit' about never going alone and wearing the appropriate safety gear.

I agree about the very fragile mental state of that poster but disagree that that particular one wasn't thinking of who they may hurt because I think they want to hurt which is why say what they do.

Looks like your downsizing is going really well; well done. I think once you start and are on a roll it gets easier and that feeling of a job well done gives you a real boost.

on him, not in him which would be rather painful!!!

Yes, it's always good to get back home Smiles Enjoy your haircut.

Allsorts Well done you. When I moved, I managed about 10 bags of clothes. Then got an invitation to a 'Line dancing evening' and the worn once blouse I had got rid of would have been perfect, also for the 'Ho Down' last Friday! I can't make myself get rid of ornaments that my AC have bought me, even bubbled wrapped a broken one and stored it , it was a very pretty glass flower with hummingbirds all around it.

Whiff I stick to this page of ours, the others sound very depressing!

Going to quickly mow the lawn before it rains.

Evening all.

Allsorts well done on resisting the dress and sorry that you Rowan had to go.

My gardener said if you chop the lower branches off as you plant it, it will grow tall and thin. Well that’s the idea.

Yogin it is hard to give away presents from family. At least your china flower is there for you to look at when you want to.

Just a quick one . Will be back soon.

Mr B is slowly improving and have everything he needs at home . Babs says they are still going through buying the bungalow and the family has rallied round getting rid of things and sorting out surveys etc and packing . When they move they will be close to one of their daughters and family.

Thankfully their estranged daughter has kept away.

She sends her best wishes to you all and her thanks for asking after her and Mr B.

Thanks for the update Whiff. Really hope the move goes ahead smoothly for them all.

Just read this and thought it applied to all here.
'Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice '.

Very true Whiff. When the going gets tough the tough get going. What first break you makes you. We all have two choices when things go bad.

Good to hear Mr. B is improving, stressful time illness and moving, hope it all works out well for them💐

Morning everyone.

Thanks for updating us Whiff. It's great news that the move is going ahead as Babs was so excited about their new home. Thank goodness they have loving and supportive family to help as it wouldn't be possible without them.

That does apply to everyone Whiff, thanks for sharing.

Wednesday was exactly one year to the date that we put down the deposit on our lodge, our new home and we were saying last night how beautiful it is here and how much we love it, but we will always wish things had been different.

With DS so far away in Aus. and without real family support, it's a relief to have done what we have when we did. No one knows what tomorrow might bring and we've done what we can to future proof our lives.

Morning all

Blooming raining, just before walkies time!

Good to hear about Babs still moving and DH doing well.

Whiff like that saying, may use it in my next Life Lesson quote for my class.

You & MrS have done really well in your moves Smiles, sounds idealik where you are now. [not sure I spelt that word correctly]

One of my park friends fell on Monday wasn't found for hours, laying in his garden. He waited 26hrs for a bed in hospital. Going to see him Sunday after my Yoga. Off to Kent tomorrow to see my b.i.l new house. My 9yr old GD is going on a weekend away with the Brownies, she is very nervous, bless her.

Have a nice day all xx

Apologies for being AWOL . Been having a running battle with Reddit of all things . They sent me an email about updated rules to do with my account and they put what they said was my username. I replied I had never joined Reddit or ever would and someone had stolen my identity to open an account. These let to email after email with their legal department. I asked the question I should have asked first when I
supposedly opened this account 17th December 2020, yes 2020. But I know exactly where I was that day in hospital and spent all day there in A&E and didn't have my phone with me . I pointed out I live alone . Finally they sent back they would inversabily delete it . So no idea what that person has been writing all these years . Only time I looked at Reddit was June 2020 when my daughter in law trolled me on a house and home thread I was on and put a link and I pressed it . And found out what she had been writing about me . Thankfully that's all over.

If I hadn't had the email I still wouldn't know someone used my details to open an account . Thankfully they don't need much to open an account just your name ,email and username you wish to use.

Smiles sorry to hear about your sons bicycle accident . Terrible shock for him , you and Mr S. Hope you told him he was to old to be having accidents and he will end up with arthritis 😁. No matter how old our children get we never stop worrying about them . When my daughter hurts herself and show concern she says mother you do know how old I am and have my own children . Always know I am in trouble if it's mother . But point out she is still my baby if my grandsons are there they laugh their socks off me calling their mom my baby .

Allsorts you are like a whirlwind with your decluttering. Must admit I loved decluttering my old house . I suppose you have come across things you wondered why you brought them in the first place . But it is very satisfying seeing bags and boxes filled with things you don't want .

My daughter took a load of things to the tip out of my garage . I really need to sort it out but I look then shut the door and think another day.

Started another BP tablet on Thursday last week my GP has prescribed. I asked the pharmacist if it would react with my other medication said I might feel dizzy for a few days until my body got used to it . He was right it made me dizzy and my heart was going like the clappers for couple of hours after taking it but Sunday it finally stopped . So I am doing ok on it . Occupational therapist came Tuesday afternoon with a bar for me to see if it was suitable to help me off my sofa but it wouldn't fit under and even if it had it would have been to high . She took my BP while here and it's dropped right down yah.

Yesterday the surveyor from mobility services came to measure for my ramp outside my front door. She said it would be about 10' long with handrail and landing . Had to be that long because of the gradient. My husband would have loved that as gradients ,risers etc was all part of his job as he was a trained draughtsman and even when they had the factory unit he couldn't stand being in the office all day so went on site 2-3 days a week .

Oops pressed post then thought it's lunch time and forget to carry on . At least now it's all measured I will just have to wait .

Yogin I do go on various threads no idea how I get myself involved with somethings. But I usually only stick to things I know something about first hand .

SparklyGrandma I love looking at old churches and cathedrals . Always amazes how they did the work with the tools they had at the time . I can enjoy the beauty of the places without them meaning anything religious to me . But I always get asked the same thing when I go into them where I go to church . Get strange reaction when I say I am an atheist. Most people don't say anything but others question me why . So I say I respect the fact they have a faith and therefore I expect people to respect that I have none. No one has given me an answer yet.

DiamondLily the thread has been deleted . How are you coping hope you are getting out and about and seeing the family but having time for yourself.

Smiles sorry only just read your son's injuries . Putting his finger back in place would have been very painful. Hopefully the doctor did it quickly. Thankfully he realised how bad it could have been to have agreed to wearing his better helmet and not going out alone .

That reminds me I must book a hair cut . Hope you enjoyed having yours done and a chat with your friend. Did Mr S win his bowls matches?

Smiles I can't believe it's been a year since you shared the news about your move . Time flies by quickly glad you and Mr S are so happy there .

Yogin sorry to hear about your park friend . When I go into the garden I latch my gate back and always have my phone on me . I never even go to my bins without my phone just incase I fall.

Be nice to see your brother in laws house . Your granddaughter will be fine once she is with her friends. My grandson went to a Beavers weekend and loved it . Which surprised he's parents .

Now I finally have caught up .

That years has gone quickly Smileless glad you are happy there and it will take you into the future.
Babs, brilliant news all is going well now your husband is home where he belongs.
Enjoy your weekend Yoga. Your gd will enjoy hers too.
Whiff what a horrible thing to happen, do you think it might be Dil as you get on with everyone else, whoever it is has a screw loose.

Allsorts it wouldn't surprise me if it was her. As she said the most vicious things about me and my daughter on Reddit June 2020 also she has been writing them for over a year before I moved here. Silly me still loved her until she wrote' FIL died to get away from MIL ' the love I had from her died that day . She never knew my husband and I am sure my son must have told her how much his dad suffered. I thought how can anyone be so wicked to write such a thing about the father of the man she loves a man she never meet .

Over the years she had shown me some great kindnesses. But now realise it was all a lie .

I decided in 2023 I am done hoping to see my son again as I was the only one hurting . I felt a weight life from my shoulders. I will always love him but the son I had for 32 years not who he is now . He is a stranger ,but then so am I as I am not the mom he knew . If my grandsons want to track me down when older I am not going anywhere. It will be their choice . But I will always love them and I never deny they exist . If I am asked I always say I have 5 grandson's which I do. Just because I don't see them doesn't stop them being my grandson's .

It seems most likely to have been her from what you say. Pathetic woman.It comes out of jealousy. She wants to be the only woman in his life. He went along with it. You have a better life now and if one day your grandsons seek you out who knows. All of us estranged from grandchildren have to make the best of it. I wonder how we are painted to gc to justify not seeing us.

Well surprise surprise guess who had to call 111 . And my daughter ended up taking me to the walk in centre. That's the great thing about living here walk in health clinics saves going to A&E. Those 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬 new blood pressure tablets made me wee that much I lost more sodium . As I already have low sodium levels last thing I need and I can only have 8-10 drinks a day so I don't dilute it further. Plus the tablets set my HPX off so had problems talking as I couldn't get the words out . Blood pressure went to 195/90 and these tablets are supposed to lower it .

I had been texting my daughter how I felt and she and my grandsons just popped round to cheer me up just as the doctor phoned from 111. She knows all my medical history so explained about my HPX and my speech. My limbs have been very painful today but started yesterday.

Luckily they gave me a bowl for urine sample as I almost filled it. But when examined it was painful when she touched my kidney area. No UTI but have kidney infection but they could only give me antibiotics for 3 days.

Will be phoning GP Monday to tell them I stopped those tablets , need a blood test to check my sodium levels and 4 days more of antibiotics.

When I took my BP twice a day for a week at 7am and 6pm not once was it 160/80 but that's what the Dr averaged it out to be . I am sticking to my normal BP tablet and will not take any others .

I can't put myself and especially not my daughter though this again. This is the third time this year she has taken me for medical care January,April and today.

I told her I don't want to be a burden she told me I am not.

So now I have another tablet to my list not to take . Plus the doctor told me not to have salt . Sod that I am having it as that probably contributed to lower my sodium levels more Sorry for the rant but just so angry and upset I am needless in pain but worst I have had to relieve on my daughter again . And hate it .

Whiff how upsetting for you and thank goodness you got swift treatment, Stop upsetting yourself about bothering your daughter, she has said many times that you are not a bother, you are too independant to be one. I think you know your own body by now and you really should have had close monitoring with your problem. I hope you take it easy until you feel you're old self.💐

Allsorts thank you . I know she doesn't see me as a burden but I hate relying on her at times. Had UTI January when I ended up in hospital for a week,another one in April and now kidney infection.
I felt fine even though my BP was high . But have been on BP tablet for years plus take tablets for my heart ,blood thinner and statin . Plus my pain tablets and my Clonazepam which stopped me limb jerks and seizures.

I was fine with my BP raised and could do all I wanted . Will add Lacidipine to the list of tablets I can't have . I keep a list in my phone case along with my health conditions, prescription,my daughter's contact details and my GP. Also my phone number as I have to make sure I get it correct . I do know it off by heart but belt and braces kind of person .
Had first antibiotic last night with my dinner and can get the 2 in today so hopefully not having the BP tablet and back to having salt will feel better tomorrow.

Hope you are starting to feel better Whiff, take care and let your lovely daughter care, she sounds a treasure .💐

Morning all, lovely and sunny, unlike yesterday!

Thanks Whiff & Allsorts re my GD. Got some pics last night of all the girls baking, so cleverly having a good time.
My b.i.l's house was lovely and we had a lovely time at their house warming/1st birthday party. Seeing my park friend after my yoga class this morning, hope he is ok.

Whiff your BP was dangerously high! I stopped taking the tabs the doc gave me for my acid idig. because I was weeing too much, I was put on another tab and that gave me vertigo! so stopped that and hope I never need to take tabs for anything again, I will certainly try not to. Hope you feel better in a few days Whiff xx