Support and friendship for those whose lives have been affected by estrangement.

why would you think my post referred to you?

Smileless2012

We do seem to get plagued by them on this forum which I do find odd. Either there's a lot of them or it's the same few using different names.

In any case they're not doing the EAC who post here any favours.

Because I am an "EAC" that is estranged adult child?

You don't think badly of me do you?

I don't think badly of anyone because they made a decision to estrange, only those who seek to disrupt this forum with their unpleasantness and disruptive techniques.

That's reassuring to hear, thank you.

What does "Not doing the EAC posting here any favours" means? Do you mean with moderators?

There are EAC posting on various threads who get unquestioning understanding and support from Smileless and various other EPs.

Nice dream we have some EAC who post using different names who are excessively combative and downright rude. They dominate threads with multiple posts and it can give the impression that all EAC are like them. This doesn't do reasonable EAC like yourself any favours which is a shame. That's why it is important to get them shut down promptly

I'm so glad to hear that

That's right eddie but TBH I thought my post was self explanatory.

Thank you Madgran, you're very kind .

I still don't understand why people would think all estranged children are like that.

I don't think all estranged parents are like my mother, that's what the person trolling is doing and that isn't very nice for any of the estranged parents here at all.

That's why I don't understand, it feels like the same thing.

Madgran77

There are EAC posting on various threads who get unquestioning understanding and support from Smileless and various other EPs.

Sorry posted too early...also meant to say

..so it is reasonable to assume that unless there is good reason Smileless would no be referring to anyone " because they are an "EAC" who is an estranged adult child.

Nobody has said they do think all EAC are like that.

Another one just started. If this person really has estranged their mother they've done her a favour.

I've reported it but won't respond

Just seen it Smileless and responded, bet mothers doing cartwheels.

It's gone Allsorts . Quick work GN and thank you.

It's gone

If we all ignore and work together at getting them reported and removed quickly maybe less people will be exposed to them in the active bit (that's where I find threads to read).

That's what we do and we've had an awful lot of practice I'm sorry to say.

How long has it been happening?

Too long.

Face timed DS earlier and he very kindly showed us the protective headgear he was wearing when he came off his bike a couple of weeks ago.

It was a shock. Badly smashed on one side and looked as if he hadn't been wearing it he could have lost an eye!!!

Thanks for keeping us so well informed son .

Smiles I think he was trying to reassure you . But it back fired. My daughter sent me a picture of what my youngest grandson had done as he landed face down in the park plus a description of how they where both covered in blood . And a picture of him with a bag of peas on his face to help keep the swelling down. After all that he wanted to scoot to pick his brother up from school then play in the garden and was grumpy when she said no. But his been enjoying telling everyone what he did to his face.

Boys no matter how old they are they get into scraps .

NiceDream there have been horrible posters which like to dig at us parents and call us liars when we say we didn't see the estrangement becoming . And particularly nasty piece of work accused me of abusing my son. But my son has no only dumped me but all over side of the family. My daughter doesn't care as I didn't know how bad things had gotten between because of my daughter in laws jealousy of her. But when I was with them all they all behaved. But for 13 years only say then every few months not always together and with my son and daughter in law it might just be for a day a round trip of 6 hours for them. My brother is still angry and doesn't understand what in his words what the fudge he did to him . That's the clean version. My nephew is hurt as they where close. But it's been 5 years now. I let go 2 years ago of any hope of seeing or speaking to him again . And been happier.

Estrangement whether is parent or child doing it there is a ripple effect which effects more than just them .

But at least here everyone fights to keep it safe unfortunately some people can't post openly for fear of being attacked, but they are free to contact people here you they feel can help them.

I know how much everyone has helped me when I felt lost . But I know I am a good mom and with my husband we brought the children up with good values. But when they are adults they choose their own path.

But as our children change so do we and I have no tolerance for bad behaviour now . Things I choose overlook I wouldn't now . So silence suits me . I have to many things I enjoy in my life and am happy. Still grieve for my husband but I live my life for him and me.

Yeah I know Whiff but it reminded me of the time he wrote off my car and I saw it on the transport being taken to a garage.
The front was completely smashed in and it was only then that I realised how lucky he'd been to walk away with a few scratches.

Kids eh; who'd 'ave em.

Glad you are doing better now Whiff it can take a while to get through it because it is the ultimate relationship really.

I didn't really have any other close family to lose. My mother was always falling out with them all so they weren't around growing up. That makes it a little easier. I haven't really spoken to them about my relationship with her so don't know if she has said much or what any of them think really. No one has asked me about it. Maybe they just aren't surprised. I don't actually have any contact information for any of them so there is nothing I can do about it and I don't think they would know how to contact me either.

It took me a while to notice how strange that is really.

Smileless2012

Another one just started. If this person really has estranged their mother they've done her a favour.

I often think, by some of the posts, that the parents of some of these estranging ACs must be hugely relieved. 🙄🤷‍♀️

No one needs 24/7 drama in their lives.

I often think that too DL and I also wonder if they have any idea how fortunate they've been. Maybe one day they'll know.

I have read a little here and there of what this person has said. Their behaviour here is not excusable at all but there has been some information left about their mother and that the abuse was serious enough it was illegal.

So I think either that is not true and there is a mother out there desperately worried about her child's mental health or it is true and they need serious mental health help immediately. No amount of being unkind to other mothers will help them.