Support and friendship for those whose lives have been affected by estrangement.

Afternoon everyone,

Anyone doing anything new and interesting as the new school starts?

Evening or day class for instance?

Turns out my EstDS has been telling my DGS porkies about why they don’t see me. (He’s prevented them seeing me).

Like I’m detained, in prison or some such. Two of my DGDs are adults now, if he has done that, he’ll have to dig himself out.

I hope and pray (hard) that my eldest DGD keeps pushing and finds me.

SparklyGrandma I imagine my son and daughter in law have told my grandsons thats if the 2 eldest remember me either I am dead or don't want to see them. My eldest grandson was 10 this week he's brother's are 8 and 6. Last time I saw the eldest 2 they where 4&2 . Don't know the name of date of birth of their brother as he was due in July 2020.

To be honest if my grandsons do want to find me they will but I am 68 now not intending to die anytime soon . Whether they bother when they are adults is up to them. But they will know the truth about their parents and I won't hold back .

Decided 3 years ago never want to see or hear from my son ever again . We are strangers . I am not the mom he knew and he is not the man I knew. I still love him but the son I had for 32 years not the son aged 39 now.

I am lucky have my daughter, son in law and 2 grandsons 8 and nearly 6.

This week put away the 8 photos of my sons boys in a cupboard along with rest of photos . And filled the frame with photos if my great nephew who was born begining of April. I will never see him in the flesh as I will never go back to the black country and doubt my niece and family will visit. They have a dog. While ok when my brother and sister in law stayed and brought their Jack Russell that was fine Aggie is lovely. I don't know my nieces dog and its a medium sized mongrel.

I hope you get your wish and your eldest granddaughter does find you but be careful if she does . You don't know what ammunition your son has instilled into his children to hurt you and please don't give her any money. I know its your choice but it may be they only thing they get in touch with you. Also hoping to be in your will. Life has taught me to be careful of other's motives and money is usually the root of what people want .

I cut my son out of my will in 2020 and left nothing to my grandsons. My husband and I believed children inherit from their parents and up to their parents if they want to give the chikdren anything.

After my husband died both the chikdren said they don't want any inheritance and to spend money on myself . I am proud of both couples they rented and saved to buy their own homes ,cars and paid for their own weddings with no help from me .
May sound old fashioned but thats the way it should be . Phrase I hated is bank of mom and dad. If children and grandchildren want something them they need to save for it. We did and went without luxuries and had camping hols .

My hols all over for the year. But booked for Aberystwyth in May and Oban in September next year. Hopefully go to see my brother and sister in law in July as usual and already decided to go somewhere in August haven't decided where yet.

My week is its normal sit fit Monday ,move it or lose it Tuesday. Wednesday night choir we are learning Eleanor Rigby, Love story,We built this city and Elastic heart. Cleaner comes on Thursday's. I went with a care company that way I know someone will come every Thursday. But included activities into it . Today no cleaning. I sorted out some old cross stitch magazines all 136 of them tied those in year order and checked with the hospice shop they are going to price them . Plus all the special cross stitch magazines. I know what cross stitchers will pay for charts and how much they cost in the first place. I don't knock things about so they are in good condition. Ranging fro 2016 to 2020. If its not raining go to the beach and if time go for a hot drink and treat on me. I have my cleaner for 90 mins .

So far my daughter is having problems getting the boys to say what they want for Christmas. She did say they needed new aprons for when they cook and back . I have always brought them . Had them specially made because they are both tall and skinny the 8 year old is my height 5' 1". He's brother is cleavage high on me.

Back to 3 from GN monthly lunch club as we call it as one has been ill so only 2 of us last 3 months . But out on the 30th table all booked.

Any way better post and read what I have missed . Will be back but this has taken me 90 mins to write .

Morning everyone.

Well Sparkly doesn't this just highlight that some EAC know they had no justification to estrange their parents and deny their children those GP's which is why they lie.

I hope that our GS's never seek me out. I wouldn't want to be confronted with two young men and the stark reality of what we were so cruelly denied.

We went to our nearest garden centre yesterday which always has the most amazing Christmas section. It's huge and takes a couple of months to set up for October 1st.

This year they've excelled themselves and a long entrance replicates Narnia with beautifully lit trees and a lit lamp post.
We just love the run up to Christmas which never ceases to amaze me bearing in mind it was Christmas Eve, 14 years ago that we were estranged so have never experienced this time of year with GC .

We're going to get a metal frame which attaches to either end of the dining table and decorate it with all things Christmas as I haven't decided what to do about a Christmas tree yet.

So many beautiful things to tempt but not having nearly as much room as we used to have, I have to be content with looking rather than buying which suits Mr. S. .

I did buy a white poodle tree decoration, not for the tree but in memory of little Pip which will of course be out all year round. Mr. S. did make me laugh when he said "it looks nothing like him" to which I replied it's white and it's a poodle!!!

Little Ziggy is in to everything so we may settle for the small tree we have which we can put on a table so it's out of reach and not use our beautiful glass baubles just in case but at least we'll have the sizeable table decoration if not.

You're certainly organised with your holidays Whiff. Our only plans so far are to go to Hadrian's wall which we had to cancel this year because Poppy was so unsettled without her brother.

My dearest friend is coming on Saturday for a few days and is really looking forward to meeting our new addition so we'll have 3 dogs to control while she's here. Her Cockapoo loves to play which Poppy's never been in to so I think she'll be rather pleased with Ziggy.

Poppy does play with him which she'd never done before so you never know, Dolly may get a pleasant surprise if she wants to play with her too.

Have a lovely weekend Smileless with your friend and her dog. The western gas been wonderful this last week.
Whiff, the older children get the more challenging to buy for.
Now mind are much older it's cash as things I bought, were frequently changed, although I always checked first.
I am only havinga small tree, doubtful if it's more than me that sees it. However, had wonderful Christmas all my life abd it was bound to happen, don't take it for granted but usually go to my son and dil for dinner as try have pets and children that frequently have their friends popping in which I love to see too.

Whiff thank you for your kind advice. I am hoping I’m not hurt again or badly.

Garden centre - Smileless plant rescue centre I’ve decided to call mine in my area.

Thank you, both.

My apple tree gave me 43 apples and this is my first crumble I’ve made from them;

Dam lost my post . Only ever happens on GN . To tired to start again. Had covid jab yesterday got a sore arm .
Have wonderful time with your friend Smiles and the dogs will have fun .

Sparkly crumble looks delicious hope you had custard with it .

Whiff this pad is ready for the bin, I check every sentence, read it back as a whole and there's many words changed, mainly to tiger or giraffe for some reason, also changes for to fir, so I change words again, press send and there again are mistakes.
Your crumble looks good Sparkly, I like mine with Cornish ice cream. I often make an individual one for myself. Like preserved ginger in too.b

Morning all

Your right Smiles about the lying as to why we are not in our GC lives, my s.i.l is the biggest liar on the planet!

I always insisted on a real tree at Xmas, loved the smell and going out to choose it. But last year I bought a really nice artificial tree, as like you Smiles moved to a smaller place. I was really pleased with it last year, it fitted in perfectly and no mess!

Joey is sitting on my lap as I type, so typing over him. Now and again he taps my arm down .

Enjoy your friends visit Smiles

Allsorts as you get older your world shrinks. I remember always having about 12-14 for Xmas dinner, over the years it gets smaller and smaller. I'm lucky to always have Xmas dinner with my DD, GC & S. Pray that never changes. Not forgetting my little doggie of course.

Sparklygran How wonderful, your apple crumble looks good enough to eat with some lovely custard. I didn't get any apples from my tree this year, think it needs another fruit tree to pollinate with. I would like to get a crabapple tree as they have amazing flowers in spring, also I grew up on Crabtree Ave.

Whiff enjoy your lunch with your GN friends. Next weekend I'm meeting up with some friends I see about 3/4 times per year, we always have a lovely time catching up. Also going for lunch with my park friend the Thursday after.

Your very good booking all your holidays, I would like to go on more, but I hate the thought of leaving Joey.

Yogin if you go on holiday some hotels and air B&B' are dog friendly . So you and Joey could go together.

I have to book my room early at Premier inn as I need an accessible room. All Premier inns and Travelodges had accessible rooms for walking and wheelchair disabled. They are the only chain hotels to have them at every hotel. Other chain hotels don't. Private hotels hardly have them plus they charge £20-25 a night if you are on your own.

It was delicious with custard, I hope my apple tree bears more fruit next year.

It’s a new experìence eating food I’ve grown, even if it’s only part of the dish or meal.

Thank you Yogin Allsorts Whiff Smileless

If Grandchildren seek you out just remember parents had to to justify why you were not in their lives, they love their parents, don't know us, so unless they can live with the fall out at home, it doesn't work. Your heart breaks all over again.

Thank you Allsorts it’s a minefield, isn’t it? My eldest DGC has just been to university and no doubt heard many varying options and perspectives there.