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Everyday Ageism

Where can you 'go' when you're out?

(64 Posts)
Grannieanne Thu 14-Jan-16 12:47:37

Yesterday on 'Breakfast' the Beeb interviewed a woman whose husband had Parkinsons and urgently needed to wee in a town where there were no public loos. She was very annoyed that she asked in several shops but they all refused to let him use their facilities, in the end he wet himself (it was particularly sad because the poor chap was sitting there on the sofa while she told us all of this) I wondered what others' opinions were, especially in this time of austerity when, according to Naga Munchetty a great many public loos are being closed (although not, thank goodness, where I live)

tanith Thu 14-Jan-16 12:53:51

Only really see public loos near bigger shopping centres nowadays, none near our local shops which must be difficult for those who need to 'go' more frequently than others..

jinglbellsfrocks Thu 14-Jan-16 12:53:58

Surely all towns have cafes? There has to be a loo in them by law. Would have cost the price of a cup of tea.

Luckygirl Thu 14-Jan-16 12:57:40

Poor chap! We have lost several public loos round here, and some shops now have a sign in the window to say they welcome people who need the loo.

Pubs, cafes and restaurants are obliged to provide loos as jingl says.

I said on another thread how Specsavers refused me the use of their loo even though I was on the premises buying glasses! - and I had to traipse up a very steep hill to find a public loo - I use a stick outdoors and they could see that. It seemed very mean to me.

grannylyn65 Thu 14-Jan-16 13:00:39

Should have told em where to stick their glasses, what a way to treat a customer Lucky !

Teetime Thu 14-Jan-16 13:01:56

Macdonalds - its the only thing that place is good for.

Riverwalk Thu 14-Jan-16 13:02:14

A man can wear a Conveen plus leg bag, when out and about.


The bag can just be emptied when he eventually finds a loo or gets home.

It's just like a condom but with an opening and tubing attached to a leg bag, so very discreet and can't be seen. So no removing of clothes, unzipping, etc.

At home the Conveen is just disposed of - tubing and bag can be re-used.

Riverwalk Thu 14-Jan-16 13:04:32

Forgot to add I don't think there's anything for us girls that doesn't involve removing clothing.

ninathenana Thu 14-Jan-16 13:15:24

The poor chap and his wife were actually on a coach when he needed to go but due to his condition he couldn't negotiate the steps etc to use the on board facilities. The coach pulled over to allow his wife to ask at shops. They were in a strange town, that and a coach full of people waiting would have stopped them finding a café.
The Burger King nearest us has a code on the receipt that you have to punch into the lock on the loos to stop non customers using them.
We are a seaside town and used to have 3 sets of public loos. It's now one.
If you have IBS or other problems it's hard.

merlotgran Thu 14-Jan-16 13:23:51

Shops that don't allow people to use their loos only have themselves to blame when folk desert the High Street in favour of a supermarket.

Indinana Thu 14-Jan-16 13:40:22

I had heard from a friend many years about a Crohn's Disease Toilet Card, a card which explains briefly that the holder has CD and needs a toilet urgently. It acts as a pass and the idea is that most shops will allow the holder to use their toilet on production of the card. I have no idea how well received this is in reality.
BUT, I just googled it and I found that in fact there is a Bladder and Bowel Foundation Toilet Card which you can apply for online.
I'm off to apply for one!

Alea Thu 14-Jan-16 14:01:12

DH who has UC amongst other things has carried a card for decades which says something along the lines of" this person suffers from an illness /condition which means they may need immediate toilet facilities. It is not infectious in anyway, please allow them access to your facilities"
Try your IBD nurse or consultant if you have anything similar.
Re using cafes, I am a past master at breezing into Costa/McDonalds wherever pretending I am meeting somebody or heading upstairs etc then breezing out again!
But more seriously, in Germany where there is a small charge for loo use in cafes, restaurants and shops, but a) the loos are immaculate, supervised by an attendant, flowers, loo seat wiped etc but more important, b) anybody can walk in and use them without having to top up their bladder with another cup of coffee.

Indinana Thu 14-Jan-16 14:19:10

Alea see my link at 13.40

Alea Thu 14-Jan-16 14:32:16

Yes I saw that.
DH had his long before we used the Internet though! He has had UC for over 50 years.

TriciaF Thu 14-Jan-16 14:48:33

There's this for women:
You would have to find a quiet corner in a park etc. I haven't got one, but someone told me about it.

Indinana Thu 14-Jan-16 14:50:44

Heavens that must be so miserable for him. My DD had a friend with Crohn's Disease from a very young age, in her early teens I think. Awful for anyone to have to live almost their entire life with such a condition.

rubysong Thu 14-Jan-16 15:43:41

I have a SheWee which has been quite useful when out walking away from civilisation.

ninathenana Thu 14-Jan-16 16:25:10

A friend of mine has had UC since her teens and is now in her 50's she has had several hospital admissions since I've known her. It's a really awful condition, my sympathies to any sufferer. She has a card, and also a blue badge.

Bellasnana Thu 14-Jan-16 16:39:02

That is one thing I love about America. All the shops have toilet facilities which cost nothing to use whether making a purchase or not.

M0nica Thu 14-Jan-16 17:52:33

All supermarkets have customer loos.

ninathenana Fri 15-Jan-16 00:38:03

Our Aldi' s doesn't MOnica.
Several of the large DIY stores do too but these are often on the outskirts of town. I usually look for a department store.

Humbertbear Fri 15-Jan-16 09:15:57

I believe you can buy a special card for £5 which you show to restaurants and cafes and they let you use the loo. I think I saw it advertised when I filled in the form for my mother' Blue Badge.

Greyduster Fri 15-Jan-16 09:34:01

I think it's usually supermarkets that have a restaurant facility that have by law to provide toilets. Places like Aldi and Lidl and the Co-op don't.

annodomini Fri 15-Jan-16 09:55:34

About 20 years ago I was wandering around Chartres on my own and was getting a bit desperate when I found a little shop with a sign informing me that their loo was available even if I wasn't buying anything. Much relief! grin Would that more shops here and in France were equally considerate.

Cher53 Fri 15-Jan-16 10:26:32

Just one thing people need be aware of. I worked in a particular type of shop and we often had people coming in and asking us to use our toilet facilities.We had to direct them to our nearest supermarket. We were actually forbidden to allow folk to use our toilet - reason- Health and Safety Regulations. (I kid you not) Our toilet facilities were down a flight of stairs, this was because a customer could sue if they fell down our stairs,plus only the staff were insured for accidents. So if a shop refuses please do not take it out on them, they may be in the same bind we were.
People made this situation though and here is as bad as the USA for sueing for every triviality.