Where can you 'go' when you're out?

French shops and cafes are far more understanding and helpful than in UK and quite happy to let non purchasing customers use their staff loos in an emergency.

I think I would threaten to wee on the floor of any shop that refused if I was desperate and had a medical condition.

I loathe public loos and would rather go behind a tree, and often do. It's good fertiliser anyway and according to GQT we should all be doing it on our compost heaps!

In Saltzburg they won't even let you stand under their awnings when it is peeing down - they would probably faint clean away if you had the temerity to ask to use their toilets! I have a Shewee which i use when i am fishing remoter locations - the alternative would be to pee into my waders which doesn't have a lot to recommend it!?

The only supermarket in our town is Morrisons and they do not have a loo (no cafe nor petrol either).

I have a card from the bowel and bladder foundation but hate using it as I'm very embarrassed by my condition which has been lifelong!! You'd think Id be used to it by now. I have bowel incontinence due to no sphinctre muscle and a deformed bowel I now have a sacral nerve implant which does help alot but I still have accidents and go into such a panic when it comes on that I render myself incapable of asking for help!!!!

Pubs and upmarket hotels. Pubs have to have loos and in my experience, they are quite relaxed about people coming in to use the facilities (though these may be variable). One country pub let me and DH use the loos even though they weren't open. Upmarket hotels because they usually have big, impersonal lobbies so you don't have to ask and nice or even luxurious loos. They are also good for getting out of the rain, taking advantage of the air conditioning or heating and sitting and reading free newspapers.

Susie M, our old Morrison's didn't have a cafe but you could ask any member of staff and they would escort you to their staff toilet. The shiny newer Morrison's has a cafe so does have customer loos.

It's worth getting a RADAR key so you can use disabled toilets. I bought one originally because I have difficulty with stairs - in many places (pubs, cafes, parks, stations...) the general loos are up or down a flight but there is usually a disabled loo with level access. I've since found it very useful when public loos are locked or expensive - though of course I always give someone in a wheelchair priority.

There's no café in our Morrisons but they do have customer loos and petrol sales.
It all seems hit and miss.

Agree with lilygran - big hotels and pubs as well as cafes and burger bars. Wetherspoon's seem to have especially good loos and any pub has something! If I feel awkward I beam at the nearest bar staff, explain and offer money for the charity box. If Waitrose don't have a customer loo they will let you use the staff one, they do in Kent anyway!
Worst are certain charity shops, I took a donation into one, needed a loo and was told absolutely not on health and safety grounds. I was also refused at my Town Hall, a concert etc. venue. Usually fine to just go in but on one occasion a bossy woman barred my way as there was 'a function'. People in business clothes were drinking coffee in the foyer. I whispered my reason for coming in and she flatly refused and directed me to the Art Gallery. She really deserved a puddle.
In the 80s I did an anonymous survey for a good loo guide to the city. Pizza Express were great - 'yes, of course I could use theirs'. It was spotless, well equipped and had a vase of tulips.

Never realised you could use loos in hotels till the S.O. [who did a lot of travelling as a rep] took me into Bono's hotel in Dublin to have a peek[and also told me to go to the loo at the Queens in Cheltenham]. Not sure if security has tightened over the past few years though. Was really annoyed on a trip up north when we stopped off at a supermarket where I knew there was a loo and was desperate. I knew the loo was at the far end of the supermarket and, when I got there it was out of order. I do think a member of staff could have let me use a staff toilet but I was too 'desperate' to get agitated. Thankfully there were some public toilets nearby. He says that anywhere that sells food to eat instore has to provide a toilet.

I don't know the in and outs of the law but I imagine that cafes, hotels, large shops, etc., are obliged to provide toilets for their customers but they are not Public Toilets as such.

The councils should be responsible for provision.

Some years back Richmond council in London had some sort of scheme with local bars and cafes allowing their loos to be used by non-customers as part of a 'neighbourhood/encourage shoppers' effort.

I was in Dubrovnik a couple of years ago, and there were no public loos!
I have IBS, and was getting a bit panicky. My gentleman friend, who is a seasoned traveller, led me to the nearest, very swanky hotel, and swanned in as though he owned the place. We used the very clean and upmarket facilities, and waltzed out again, nodding and smiling at the extremely chic receptionist. Not an eyelid was batted, tho' I felt rather guilty.

It was a different story on the return coach trip to our cruise ship. I went to use the coach toilet and was told 'NO USE - we just cleaned!' I sat with agonising stomach cramps for nearly two hours, then faced a long security queue to get on the ship and use the loo. I was so desperate, I was in tears, and the lovely crew shepherded me quickly on board to the medical facility - what a relief!

Unfortunately, I had to submit to a complete physical before they would let me out, in case I had some lurgy which would contaminate their beautifully sanitized ship. Very understandable, tho' - as anyone bringing a virus on board could cost them squillions of quid in compensation.

Anyway, that was quite enough of lavatorial adventures for me - and nowadays, I plot my course from one available loo to another!

I have a bowel & bladder problem and got an 'I CANT WAIT' card that explains that I have a medical condition & need to use a loo.

In the past I've shown it in a variety of shops and have always been shown to their loo. It's brilliant and only cost £5 from The IBS Network. There is somewhere that does them but I can't remember who at the mo.

Congratulations + appreciation for airing this fundamental of all activities-I think it always helps to share however embarrassing it can be to mention the subject.

I remember my DS sneaking me into McDonalds in Madrid to use the loo. Ironic as neither of us would dream of eating there - veggies as we are. Many councils have had to close public facilities because vandalism made them too costly to maintain. We once found that one of our public loos was advertised in a certain publication as a good place for gay men to meet each other.

The only time anyone has ever been really nasty to me when I've asked to use a loo was when we drove round the Ring of Kerry; there were no public toilets anywhere so we eventually stopped off at a café and I asked if I could use the loo. I'm pretty sure that I offered to buy something. She did let me use it but she had a face like a box of frogs and made me feel really awkward .

I now have to use a scooter when shopping so have Radar key for disabled toilets but when I was mobile both home and abroad I had no hesitation in going into hotels and pubs.

Very intetesting subject. I can have urgent bathroom needs and I often wont go out because I am petrified of not finding a bathroom fast and totally disgracing myself
SPF

My mother in law had stomach cancer many years ago and the operation made her need the toilet urgently at times - she also eventually got a card which briefly explained the problem and would use it as necessary but I know she found it extremely embarrassing. I don't have a medical need as such but have an extremely weak bladder and am forever needing to find a toilet - I probably know every public loo in our nearest town and shopping centres but for years one of our out of town retail areas had no toilet facilities. I would have to get back in the car and go to the nearest supermarket then drive back again to continue my shopping. They recently added a couple of new stores and the Next one has a toilet I'm the bane of my husbands life but then a few years ago he developed a bladder stone and subsequent infections meant he was worse than me - I think it made him realise how difficult it is so he's a little more sympathetic now!

PS I'm a big advocate of P-Mates - disposable and very easy to carry in your handbag - invaluable for festival toilets!!

Just looked up Pmates...a porn site!

And here is the problem anno- many people who ask to use the toilet in shops and cafés then leave them in a terrible state, and nick stuff too- and public toilets are increasingly used by prostitutes or dogging, or gay casual sex- etc- or vandalised. Such a shame, and as usual, the nice, honest people who would truly need to use them are told NO.

granjura How do you know it's the people who only want to use the loo who nick things and leave them in a mess? Why not the customers?

Miep you omitted the hyphen in p-mates.

It can be very difficult. Near us there is a newish shopping park with the sort of furniture and Currys shops where people spend a lot of time browsing. Until recently the only loos where in Burger King. There are now a couple more eating places.
When building these shopping parks why don't the designers be made to arrange for toilets on site charge each of the retail outlets a proportion of the maintenance costs.

I have all the toilets on my 50 mile route to see the dgcs, with accessible parking mapped in my head.
The first on my way is 15miles in a Morrisons supermarket.
That usually allows for a stop off after my two morning cups of tea.
There are at least seven altogether as I cross a noted tourism area.

I do feel sorry for those of you with these particular health issues.