So how old do you think I am? (Don’t answer that!)

Never judge a book by it's cover!
There is a local woman age about 70, who I vaguely know, who is very petite and slim. She obviously takes care with her appearance & goes regularly to the local gym/pool. She looks 'good' for her age! But she is a miserable "old" woman. Her attitudes are negative and when I bump into her in the street and she starts to chat I feel as if I am whisked back to the 1950s..she is such a bigot!

I am 75 and regularly drive on the M25, M4, M1 and M40 - and A34.

I will be driving A34, M40, M1 and A1(M) next weekend when I take DDiL and DGC back north after spending half term with us. 200 miles in all.

The Instiyof Advanced Motorists’ report shows that 8% of drivers are over 70 and are involved in 4% of injury crashes. In contrast the 15% of drivers in their teens and twenties are involved in 34% of injury crashes.
Worth pointing out Maw

I am at the other end of the spectrum. I am wearing very well, but equally dislike someone exclaiming at how young looking, fit etc etc I am. It suggests people have fixed and very limited stereotypes of what someone at any given age looks like, when in fact the older people get the more varied they are in everything from appearance to health to living circumstances.

Why cannot people just take us for what we are and stop putting age labels on us and then defining us by them.

I am neither 74 nor a nervous driver, if I were I would not tackle the M25 M1 M6 M4 etc with equanimity!
I still maintain it is tactless if not ageist to be "congratulated " on "still driving"
It's like expressing wonderment at a woman who is a fighter pilot or an HGV driver.
Bah humbug!

A couple of times recently in cafes the staff have offered to carry my tray to the table for me. I usually give them a wry smile and say ‘I’m just about capable of doing it’. Then I walk off at a fair lick. I suppose I should be grateful but I'm not. I’m 72.

Some years ago, when I was about 48, a woman whose husband I'd looked after (they were in their 80s) asked me if I'd retired from work!

It was when I became REALLY old (over 80) I began to panic about losing my independence.
I need to be able to go out and about without offers of lifts, or using a stick or a zimmer etc.
Now that the dark evenings are coming I've just bought a head torch to wear when I walk to evening meetings etc. To prevent tripping on rough pavements etc.
Maybe I shouldn't care so much about independence.

I'm 77, and I know I'm getting old now. I quite like people to recognise the fact and show a bit of care. Makes me feel slightly cocooned. It's the lemons and lemonade thing again.

More years ago than I care to remember, I bought a pair of boots and, when I went to pay for them, the 20-ish salesman asked me if I had the store's over 60 discount card. OK, they were very sensible bad-weather boots but even so ... I was 45 at the time!!!
When I treated him to my death stare, he hastily said, "oh, forgive me. I didn't mean to offend you. It's just that we get so many young looking over 60s in here, I tend to ask everyone ....". Yeah, right - but full marks for a fast recovery!

There are an awful lot of nervous drivers around, of both sexes and all ages. My DDiL hasn't driven since she had children in case she had an accident and the children were in the car or she hit a car with children in it. Another friends was so nervous she almost drove with her eyes shut. I went away with her in her car once and swore I would never do it again.

When I was in my early 40s a neighbour congratulated me after watching me park the family Volvo Estate and said I was so brave to drive such a large car - she would be terrified to do so.

I reckon this lady and her mother were just congenitally nervous drivers who are terrified driving anywhere except down a dual carriageway with no other cars in sight.

I think what I'm trying to say about the opening post is that, as I see it, the remark wasn't about the person it was spoken to but indirectly about the person speaking.

I think 74 is elderly. Some people of 74 will appear to be, and actually be in respect of failing faculties, older than others of the same age. So what?

Faculties do drop off as one ages. More so for some than for others but I think it more or less happens to everyone to some extent.

When I read the opening post it occurred to me that the shop assistant wasn't really thinking about the person in front of her at the time, but about her mum, presumably of the same generation as maw (could be ten years younger or older), who doesn't drive. I think she was just being chatty.

And my initial comment I actually do mean quite literally. I really don't get it. Perhaps I just don't care what some complete stranger thinks about my age.

OH and I were recently described to a third party as "that very well-spoken elderly couple". Eldest DS heard about it and laughed himself silly. I was miffed. I take care to look my best, good haircut, decent well-cared for, well chosen clothes, good but not over the top make up and don't think I look my age (74). Elderly!!!!!!! But I share the view above, it's bad enough being called elderly, but even worse (which we didn't get) is being patronised.

merlot I have lived in Bucks for over 33 years and have always found the roundabouts in Bletchley a total nightmare.

Maybe you invited the remark by commenting on the complicated roundabouts?

Apologies for snapping Baggs it’s not the age, it’s the assumption that the faculties are fast dropping off.

We took the grandchildren to a local NT property recently and whilst I was helping one of them to tidy up after an art activity, one of the volunteers said to him,
"When you and mummy have finished, why don't you take a selfie by the Halloween display?"
I did turn around expecting to see his mum....but it was me she was on about!
I'm 67 and he's 5.
Perhaps she wasn't wearing her specs that day. ?

Yes it damn well is Baggs I drive 300. miles to Scotland, 150+ miles to Somerset , regularly (weekly) drive to and from Birmingham (150 mile round trip) or to London, the same and I think I am entitled to feel patronised by somebody who seems to think I need congratulating on “keeping on driving” ?

I don't get this touchiness about age. Is it real?

Charleygirl ??????

After a sleepless night, and week 5 of builders and decorators (at least 5 more weeks to go) my eye cream is good but not miraculous!!!

The first thought that came to my mind was where were your bags, in your hands or under your eyes!!!

The nice (?) man at the Kiehls counter in Debenhams just asked me if I was ok, along with "oh my lovely can you manage" and "hopefully you are going home now as you have rather a lot of bags"!!!!

I recently enquired at the ticket office in a mainline station about times and cost of a journey to an outer London suburb. 'You can use your Freedom Pass' was the crushing reply

I'm a mere 64 and totally amazed that anyone would think I'm anywhere near that age - I'm too young for a Freedom Pass, but being in London I have the 60+ Card which is just as good.

Just had a new passport photo too - look every inch my years as ya not allowed to smile! Whenever I check myself in the mirror, thinking not looking too bad, I smile inanely. All very sad