Growing old

Used to be blonde, good for you and long may it continue. Itsa blessing you are well.
All ages have their own problems,
Katjoy, you have got into a rut, your son wants to be with you, he wants you to have a good time, if you prefer something local which you could do any time, suggest it for his next visit, can’t you just enjoy what he has planned and enjoy the moment, I would me so happy if my son wanted to do what yours does for you..

Inside I am still the young girl on the back of the 1000cc motorbike in leathers, clinging onto the guy in front for dear life, listening to Led Zeppelin and wearing my hair long. She never did go away but the world around me changed. Leathers got mould, bike got sold, guy still around, and hair long but grey. As the Buddhists say: change is a constant.

I am 87 .
I travelled by train to visit my D , a very long journey involving three changes at the start of the year, since then I have been to Llandudno, by car staying overnight with a day in Chester the next day.
Two visits to Nottingham, one by car for a two night stay, one visit alone by train for a three night stay meeting my D and Gd.
One visit to Baslow in Derbyshire for two nights with a friend and am travelling by train to Oxford to meet up with my D at half term.
I have all my own teeth .
I know I am blessed , I thank “whatever” for my good fortune.I never, ever, take it for granted.
I love going out for meals and enjoy a nice cocktail and a glass ( or two) of wine.
I wish it were the same for all my age.

Katjoy I think he is just wanting to give you a treat and being unimaginative. You could say that you don’t do busy crowded places any more. If he persists could you suggest a country house hotel with a good restaurant. Not sure why you think he is trying to ‘better’ you. Enjoy the visit anyway.

Katjoy have you told your son which restaurant it would be a real treat for them to take you to?

Are either of the two you like small family concerns?

The "exclusivity" of this might sway your son, tell him he could boast to his posh friends about having found this really authentic little place, hidden away...

“Old age is not for Sissies” is often attributed to the American actress and comedian Bette Davis. The expression emphasizes that aging is not a straightforward journey. It requires a willingness to confront the inevitable challenges of advancing years.
I so agree it is fine when you still are fit and well but the past couple of years have brought DH and myself so many health problems . I am glad that the DGC are now teenagers and do not need running after any more. Another sad thing is the fact that you loose so many dear friends. Almost all the pole I thought of as on my wavelength are gone that is really hard .

I am happier in my skin at my age than I ever was when younger. I don't take things as seriously, don't dress to please but for comfort, and don't feel guilty if one day I just don't do very much at all. Of course I do have a creaky hip and knee but still manage to go on my rambles with my DH for miles on some days, and my eyesight isn't great, or my teeth, but being older has been liberating in some ways.
Just enjoy life without too many expectations.

Since my doctor's appointment I've mentioned in another forum I took the plunge and went to a coffee morning held by a friends daughter. It's not usually my scene but I met 2 ladies - similar age to mine I'd not met before and we had a most wonderful chat about life at our age and our backgrounds and lots of laughter. We felt 'normal' not 'old'!!!! It made me feel good and it was lovely - in spite of the horrendous weather!!

Hi Everyone, my son and family are coming to visit me in October. I don’t see them that often because they live London way. Anyhow they want to take me out “somewhere nice” for dinner. They are proposing a really posh place in Birmingham city centre. I can’t make my son understand that since Covid (I live a very quiet life in my park home surrounded by like minded neighbours) that going to large shopping malls and posh places to eat completely overwhelms me. I lost my husband 14yrs ago and have become quite happy with my own company and driving out to a little market town to visit my brother. My son just doesn’t get it, I would be far happier going to a local Indian or Italian restaurant. How can I make him understand how I feel. His lifestyle is rather grand now, meeting politicians, actors and other influential persons as part of his job. It’s as though he’s always trying to “better” me, f that makes sense.

I'm feeling all of my 64 years today, I have a loose back tooth and think my only option will have to have it out

I lost the tooth in front of it when I crunched on a Polo fifteen years ago and it was irreparable. It really hurt on Saturday but isn't as bad today, hopefully I'll make it through to my appointment on 6 October. At least the days of tying string and slamming the door are over

I'm also 80 and in possession of my hair and teeth (well, I've paid for them). It hasn't been the best year to turn 80. My birthday fell on the day a new lockdown was imposed - November 5th. So the family gathering was postponed. I'm hoping to see them all together this time round.
The garden that was supposed to be easy to maintain has proved to be a nightmare owing to two flooding episodes in five years, destroying my lovingly planted perennials and bringing down a lot of nasty weeds. I'm not up to much in the way of hard labour! I count my blessings: friends and family - the GC are all making strides into a successful future.

.How do other G N's respond when asked their age Should I be flattered when told ''You don't 'look it''.
How should I look ? . Well past the age of 'coy'and blushing but feel a need to respond.

I am 60 and my DH 70 despite heart problems he is so active unlike many of his age, an ex rugby player/referee we both now do Circuit Training 3 times a week and a nod to his stiffening up, pilates twice a week, still go away in our motorhome and take our dogs on long walks most days. His outlook is getting a little set on some ideas and his deafness is nearly complete (always been hard of hearing) but he has an interest in what goes on around him and is good company. We are both lucky.

Teetime

Use it or lose it though - keep dancing!!!

Unfortunately some of us do "use it" and "lose it" regardless.

I think the saying "You don't stop living because you are growing older, you grow older because you stop living." is absurd.

I'm living - but definitely growing older and what I can't do anymore is hugely frustrating.
Some things I didn't get round to (because I was living) and they just won't happen now. None are huge things, but I definitely missed out by not have done them sooner.

Growing old is inevitable - unless you die young.

I was chatting to a lady in church yesterday. She is tall, , elegant and always beautifully dressed. She told me it was her 80th birthday tomorrow [today] and I said she didn't lok old enough. 'Everyone says that', she said!

aggie
Nah, your ok. My daughter (50) has done that.?

I’m 80 + , I wonder sometimes if I’m still ok , for example , I lost my glasses this morning , gave in and took out the spares . They aren’t as comfortable as the others , did another rootle around , found many crochet hooks ! Went to read my kindle for a sit down , but was feeling restless so walked round the garden , took a pic of a butterfly , shoved my glasses on top of my head so I wouldn’t lose them , wandered into the bathroom . Glanced in the mirror …. I had TWO sets of spectacles on top of my head !

Once I passed 80 I now count every day as a bonus. I never expected to live this long. I still enjoy lots of things.

We both have most of our hair, (Although the colour has changed), ditto for teeth, the hearing aids ARE a help, and we are still both mobile, on feet or driving long distances in cars.
Hope to travel 150 miles to visit SiL and BiL who are just a little older than us, in their late 80s, soon.

But can't remember when things began to change!

What a blessing to have pretty good health!

Pavane - love your black humour

My DM retired at 58 and decided that she was an old lady. From that point on she sat on her bottom and ate cream buns. Her ambition for years was to be a Grandma and she doted on my DC but her insistence that she was old and frail (she most definitely wasn't) meant that she missed out on doing anything physical with them. She developed dementia in her 80s but was persuaded to be more active than she had ever been at 60.

Now in our mid and late 70's and with the help of the pandemic we have slowed down a lot and hospital visits have suddenly loomed large but we make the most of our time and enjoy ourselves with friends and family. I reckon that is the most important thing just accepting things can be good but different.

@pavane

Well I was enjoying my late sixties and the start of my seventies. Small GC, teaching one afternoon a week, having mini breaks to Europe, Aussie family scheduled to visit etc etc then along came the pandemic .
I admit to feeling very fed up at the thought of winter without the odd trip abroad to look forward to.