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Menus for grieving niece.

(100 Posts)
ExDancer Thu 05-Dec-24 11:12:14

My husband's brother has died, and his daughter (our niece) is coming over from Portugal to stay with us for the week of the funeral.
We are both 85 and pretty fragile, but happy to put her up she's coming a long way and is alone and grieving for her Dad. She's in her 50s.
She asked us to make all the funeral arrangements, which hasn't been straightforward yet everything is finally arranged.
So what's my problem?
Answer - cooking.
I'm a plain cook (as most people my age are) and she's an expert and not shy with criticism, I usually batch-cook for the freezer, but plain things like shepherd's pie, hotpot, beef pies etc.
She doesn't like mince and that includes sausages, or chicken or lamb or fish, I use a lot of chicken and mince.
So I'm currently wracking my brains as to what to make - I need 6 meals I can produce quickly, preferably from the freezer - please can any of you come up with some ideas?
So far I have a menu of:-
Roast pork etc for Sunday
Toad in the hole for Monday (yes I know - sausages) but easy
Tuesday? Wednesday? Thursday? Friday? Saturday?

Grandmabatty Thu 05-Dec-24 11:13:43

A salad based meal with bits and pieces she can choose?
Steak pie?
She has a restricted diet!

Calendargirl Thu 05-Dec-24 11:22:45

Pasta dishes? Not from freezer, but quite quick and simple.

Bacon, onion, cheese, potato hot pot, also not from freezer.

Jacket potatoes with fillings.

Liver and onions.

Hearty soups with crusty bread.

Oh dear, she sounds quite a fussy eater to me. Difficult to think of much.

MissAdventure Thu 05-Dec-24 11:27:44

Hopefully she'll be very grateful for all you've done thus far, and can get in a takeaway to treat you one night, at least, and perhaps eat out another.

Just cook what you're comfortable doing, I'd say.

pascal30 Thu 05-Dec-24 11:28:47

I'd go for fish dishes.. maybe prawn salad, pasta with salmon, fish and chips.. simple but good quality fish..

She's jolly lucky to have you.. I hope she's grateful

Calendargirl Thu 05-Dec-24 11:32:37

OP says fish is out, I think.

pascal30 Thu 05-Dec-24 11:44:39

Calendargirl

OP says fish is out, I think.

Oh no.. missed that.. gruel maybe?

MissAdventure Thu 05-Dec-24 11:51:25

Chicken casserole.
Chicken chasseur.
Chicken wraps with fries, dips, salad.

Jacket potato with veggie chilli.
Omelette and wedges.
Macaroni cheese.

pascal30 Thu 05-Dec-24 11:57:17

MissAdventure

Chicken casserole.
Chicken chasseur.
Chicken wraps with fries, dips, salad.

Jacket potato with veggie chilli.
Omelette and wedges.
Macaroni cheese.

chicken is out...

MissAdventure Thu 05-Dec-24 11:58:06

Oh noo.
I thought I'd excelled myself there!

MissAdventure Thu 05-Dec-24 11:59:30

Oh yes.
Just read through the list again.
Dunno what the woman lives on!

Calendargirl Thu 05-Dec-24 12:01:32

I know you’re having pork for Sunday, but maybe pork steaks with potatoes and veg in the slow cooker for later in the week?

If no slow cooker, could do in the oven.

kittylester Thu 05-Dec-24 12:04:48

Fish and chips
Take away pizza

Jaxjacky Thu 05-Dec-24 12:17:56

No fish kitty

Mushroom omelette
Cheese and onion quiche
Cheese, onion and potato pie
Jacket potatoes with baked beans.

Veg or salad with the first three, small potatoes.

mumofmadboys Thu 05-Dec-24 12:21:14

Could you ask her if she would like to cook one evening?

Llamedos13 Thu 05-Dec-24 12:21:23

Take her shopping in Marks food hall?

Kate1949 Thu 05-Dec-24 12:30:09

Gammon with jacket potatoes.
Pasta with some sort of sauce.
I second omelette or quiche with chips or jacket, salad.

AskAlice Thu 05-Dec-24 12:53:17

How about the famous SOAP dish?

I've done pasta with chicken livers disguised in a rich tomato sauce for my GC when they were very small - they love it. Does she have an aversion to liver/offal in general?

Quiche Lorraine with salad

Beef casserole (I'm assuming chunks of beef are OK?)

Pork stir fry with the leftover pork (and I've been known to use frozen mixed veg/french beans/carrots in those, and it turned out fine.)

That's 5, I'm also racking my brains for a 6th - Oh, vegetable curry!

Good luck, I hope it goes smoothly for you all at a sad time.

ferry23 Thu 05-Dec-24 13:03:58

Vegetable curry with lentils

Vegetable lasagne

Cheese & Onion pie

Pasta with tomato sauce

Pasta with vegetable sauce

Stuffed peppers (rice or lentils with chopped veg)

RosiesMaw2 Thu 05-Dec-24 13:48:17

Maybe given your age, she might like to cook for you one or more day (s)
You could ask for suggestions and ingredients and shop in advance.

Baggs Thu 05-Dec-24 13:53:52

Good grief!

Take her to the nearest supermarket and shoo her in. Tell her you'll wait in the car (or a cafe).

A parent dying is not an excuse for being utterly self-centred and precious. What happened - serious health issues appart - to eating what's put in front of you in someone else's house?

FriedGreenTomatoes2 Thu 05-Dec-24 13:54:50

I just think she sounds an entitled mare, grieving or not. You’ve already arranged the funeral. All she has to do is fly in. I’d buy in ‘supplies’ - bread, soups, hummus, cheeses, salad stuff, eggs, quiches. Open the fridge and decide on the day “fancy an omelette love with some salad?”. Next day “how about a pork chop with some veg dear?”. I think you’re over-thing this because you’re kind. She’s critical is she? Well, tough.

FriedGreenTomatoes2 Thu 05-Dec-24 13:56:45

Seconded Baggs (and X posts!).

Farzanah Thu 05-Dec-24 14:00:26

Yes let her buy what she wants. Is she vegetarian?
Tapas is the way to go. Several small plates.

Baggs Thu 05-Dec-24 14:00:50

Thanks, FGT. Following your suggestions, I'd back having in plenty of eggs, tins (or other containers) of soup, bread, etc.

Then, the OP and husband eat what they would have been eating anyway (possibly with some bread on the side to spread it into enough for three) and if she doesn't want that, ask her if she'd like to make herself an omelet/baked potato, etc.