LIMERICKS 5

His gran when she saw the tattoo
Said,”There’s something I want you to do,
Please book one for me",

His gran when she saw the tattoo
Said,”There’s something I want you to do,
Please book one for me",
So I'll feel young and free

His Gran when she saw the tattoo
said “There’s something I want you to do”
Please book one for me
So I’ll feel young and free
NO NO he cried and quickly withdrew

So she took herself off to the High Street

So she took herself off to the High Street
Wondering at the reactions she might meet

So she took herself off to the High Street
Wondering at the reactions she might meet
She needn’t have feared

So she took herself off to the High Street
Wondering at the reactions she might meet
She needn’t have feared
Tho' they thought she was weird

So she took herself off to the High Street
Wondering at the reactions she might meetr
She needn’t have feared
Tho' they thought she was weird
With a ‘tat’ that was oh so discreet.

A little boy said to his chum

A little boy said to his chum
Why must I eat EVERY crumb?

A little boy said to his chum
Why must I eat EVERY crumb?
It’ll make you grow tall

A little boy said to his chum
Why must I eat EVERY crumb?
It’ll make you grow tall
So you can play basketball

A little boy said to his chum
Why must I eat EVERY crumb?
It’ll make you grow tall
So you can play basketball
As well as master the kettle drum

Thinking things through, he replied

A little boy said to his chum
Why must I eat EVERY crumb?
It’ll make you grow tall
So you can play basketball
As well as master the kettle drum

Thinking things through, he replied
“Well I prefer to have everything fried”

Thinking things through, he replied
“Well I prefer to have everything fried”
Mum said, " In your dreams!'

Thinking things through, he replied
“Well I prefer to have everything fried”
Mum said, " In your dreams!'
You'd end up being 'fatty' of the teams!!

Thinking things through, he replied
“Well I prefer to have everything fried”
Mum said, " In your dreams!'
You'd end up being 'fatty' of the teams,
And probably disqualified!

There was an old man from Darjeeling

There was an old man from Darjeeling
He went searching for perfect healing

There was an old man from Darjeeling
He went searching for perfect healing
From doctors to witches

There was an old man from Darjeeling
He went searching for perfect healing
From doctors to witches
He had them in stitches

There was an old man from Darjeeling
He went searching for perfect healing
From doctors to witches
He had them in stitches
When he leapt up as high as the ceiling!

Dark November is here once again

Dark November is here once again
When the weather can be a real pain

Dark November is here once again
When the weather can be a real pain
We'll don't sit and grouse

3rd line
Well,don't sit and grouse

Dark November is here once again
When the weather can be a real pain
Well don't sit and grouse
Go get out of the house

Dark November is here once again
When the weather can be a real pain
Well don't sit and grouse
Go get out of the house
There's more things than grizzling about rain

There was an old miser in Devon

There was an old miser in Devon
Who went for a swim in the Severn