Limericks 11

It'll take till next Xmas to shift this blubber
Dancing will do it, I'm a keen night-clubber

It'll take till next Xmas to shift this blubber
Dancing will do it, I'm a keen night- clubber
I could rock ' n ' roll all night

It'll take till next Xmas to shift this blubber
Dancing will do it, I'm a keen night-clubber
I could rock'n'roll all night
By 'eck, what a wobbly sight

It'll take till next Xmas to shift this blubber
Dancing will do it, I'm a keen night-clubber
I could rock'n'roll all night
By 'eck, what a wobbly sight
Dare I say I look a bit of a scrubber

Young Charlotte seems braver than George

Young Charlotte seems braver than George
A life in the spotlight she’ll forge

Young Charlotte seems braver than George
A life in the spotlight she’ll forge
She must keep in mind

Young Charlotte seems braver than George
A life in the spotlight she’ll forge
She must keep in mind
That she will be confined

Young Charlotte seems braver than George
A life in the spotlight she’ll forge
She must keep in mind
That she will be confined
And must not on rich food then gorge

I’m not what you call a good cook

I’m not what you call a good cook
Though I’m quite good at cooking a book!

I’m not what you call a good cook
Though I’m quite good at cooking a book!
Oh dear, is that legal?

I’m not what you call a good cook
Though I’m quite good at cooking a book!
Oh dear, is that legal?
Avoid a legal eagle!

I’m not what you call a good cook
Though I’m quite good at cooking a book!
Oh dear, is that legal?
Avoid a legal eagle!
I don't care, I just cock a snook!

There's a little old man in my shed

There's a little old man in my shed
I keep him well watered and fed

There's a little old man in my shed
I keep him well watered and fed
We’ve been married for years

There's a little old man in my shed
I keep him well watered and fed
We’ve been married for years
But he's caused me some tears

There's a little old man in my shed
I keep him well watered and fed
We’ve been married for years
But he's caused me some tears
So I'm happy to keep him out of my bed

Was I wrong to give the giblets to the fox

Was I wrong to give the giblets to the fox?
It could be considered unorthodox

Was I wrong to give the giblets to the fox?
It could be considered unorthodox
I do regret the calling card!

Was I wrong to give the giblets to the fox?
It could be considered unorthodox
I do regret the calling card!
In future tidbits will be barred

Was I wrong to give the giblets to the fox?
It could be considered unorthodox
I do regret the calling card!
In future tidbits will be barred
They will go into the composting box.

I love to hear the hedgehogs at night

I love to hear the hedgehogs at night
But their snuffling does give me a fright

I love to hear the hedgehogs at night
But their snuffling does give me a fright
I know they have fleas

I love to hear the hedgehogs at night
But their snuffling does give me a fright
I know they have fleas
So don`t pick them up, please,

I love to hear the hedgehogs at night
But their snuffling does give me a fright
I know they have fleas
So don`t pick them up, please,
Be gentle, if they're scared they might bite.

They love eating dogfood in a bowl

They love eating dogfood in a bowl
‘My’ hedgehog was run over, poor soul