Limericks 15

The damsons are ripening on my tree
The wasps there are really beastly

The damsons are ripening on my tree
The wasps there are really beastly
Can't go near

The damsons are ripening on my tree
The wasps there are really beastly
I can't go near
For I live in fear

The damsons are ripening on my tree
The wasps there are really beastly
I can't go near
For I live in fear
Of ending up quite unsightly.

A cat creeps around my lawn at night

A cat creeps around my lawn at night
Giving poor small creatures a fright

A cat creeps around my lawn at night
Giving poor small creatures a fright
Deposits on grass

A cat creeps around my lawn at night
Giving poor small creatures a fright
Deposits on grass
He's as bold as brass

A cat creeps around my lawn at night
Giving poor small creatures a fright
Deposits on grass
He's as bold as brass
He’d better keep out of my sight

I much prefer to own a dog

I much prefer to own a dog
Though hes apt to chase that crafty old mog

I much prefer to own a dog
Though hes apt to chase that crafty mog
That's just nature's way

I much prefer to own a dog
Though hes apt to chase that crafty mog
That's just nature's way
Of getting moggy to pay

I much prefer to own a dog
Though he's apt to chase that crafty mog
That's just nature's way
Of getting moggy to pay
Or we will have a dialogue.

Would you like a pet which could speak?

Would you like a pet which could speak?
With pretty feathers and an active beak,

Would you like a pet which could speak?
With pretty feathers and an active beak,
Would you let it fly free

Would you like a pet which could speak?
With pretty feathers and an active beak,
Would you let it fly free
Or perched on a tree

Would you like a pet which could speak?
With pretty feathers and an active beak,
Would you let it fly free
Or perch on a tree
Its freedom I’m sure it would seek

Labradoodles are such a price!

Labradoodles are such a price!
I’d much rather have two white mice

Labradoodles are such a price!
I’d much rather have two white mice
With whiskers so cute

Labradoodles are such a price!
I’d much rather have two white mice
With whiskers so cute
And a little hairy suit

Labradoodles are such a price!
I’d much rather have two white mice
With whiskers so cute
And a little hairy suit
Yum these sugar mice are so nice

The beaches where I live are sandy

The beaches where I live are sandy
That’s all very fine and dandy

The beaches where I live are sandy
That's all very fine and dandy
The sea is so blue

The beaches where I live are sandy
That's all very fine and dandy
The sea is so blue
But my skin is too

The beaches where I live are sandy
That's all very fine and dandy
The sea is so blue
But my skin is too
A blanket would come in handy

A deep sea diver from Bridport

A deep sea diver from Bridport
Found some old china marked 'Coalport'