July 21 Limericks

It winged across the air, askew
Towards the worried crowd it flew
It dropped 3 foot short
I hoped it would thwart
Injury and a chance to sue

If I’d moved to Australia

If I'd moved to Australia
Would I have been a failure?

If I'd moved to Australia
Would I have been a failure?
So sporty out there

If I'd moved to Australia
Would I have been a failure?
So sporty out there
Always up for a dare

If I'd moved to Australia
Would I have been a failure?
So sporty out there
Always up for a dare
With no paraphenalia

It's almost July already

It's almost July already
And today it's raining quite steady

It's almost July already
And today it's raining quite steady
It's blowing a gale

It's almost July already
And today it's raining quite steady
It's blowing a gale
That’s 8 on the scale

It's almost July already
And today it's raining quite steady
It's blowing a gale
That’s 8 on the scale
Good weather for eating spaghetti

Here, it is hot and it's smoky

Here, it is hot and it's smoky
That’s enough to make you croaky

Here, it is hot and it’s smoky
That’s enough to make you croaky
With a cough so hoarse

Here, it is hot and it’s smoky
That’s enough to make you croaky
With a cough so hoarse
Like swallowing gorse,

Here, it is hot and it’s smoky
That’s enough to make you croaky
With a cough so hoarse
Like swallowing gorse,
And this room is oh so pokey !

I think I’ll make a trip to town

The bus fares are making me frown

I think I’ll make a trip to town
The bus fares are making me frown

I think I’ll make a trip to town
The bus fares are making me frown
I’m glad of my ‘pass’

I think I’ll make a trip to town
The bus fares are making me frown
I’m glad of my ‘pass’
Though it’s not first class

I think I’ll make a trip to town
The bus fares are making me frown
I’m glad of my ‘pass’
Though it’s not first class
Didn’t even cost me half a crown

My girlfriends and I have a plan

My girlfriends and I have a plan
To locate a good handyman

My girlfriends and I have a plan
To locate a good handyman
First we’ll search the gym

My girlfriends and I have a plan
To locate a good handyman
First we’ll search the gym
Or go out on a whim

My girlfriends and I have a plan
To locate a good handyman
First we’ll search the gym
Or go out on a whim
The last fellow took off and ran

Do you know the latest dance craze?

Do you know the latest dance craze?
Its shocking in a number of ways,

Do you know the latest dance craze?
Its shocking in a number of ways,
It involves stripping

Do you know the latest dance craze?
Its shocking in a number of ways,
It involves stripping
Hope there’s no gripping!