July 21 Limericks

Then sent to bed with no dinner
Yep, my mother was truly a "winner"

Then sent to bed with no dinner
Yep, my mother was truly a "winner"
As soon as I could

Then sent to bed with no dinner
Yep, my mother was truly a "winner"
As soon as I could
I sneaked some rice pud

Then sent to bed with no dinner
Yep, my mother was truly a "winner"
As soon as I could
I sneaked some rice pud
That’s when she called me a dinner

Those old days of seen and not heard’?

Those days of seen and not heard?
Out of the way and not a word

Those days of seen and not heard?
Out of the way and not a word
Doesn't work these days

Those days of seen and not heard?
Out of the way and not a word
Doesn't work these days
Kids are not fazed

Those days of seen and not heard?
Out of the way and not a word
Doesn't work these days
Kids do not get fazed

Those days of seen and not heard?
Out of the way and not a word
Doesn't work these days
Kids do not get fazed
They now think those rules are absurd.

What would they have thought of the cane?!

What would they have thought of the cane?!
They’d think our mothers were insane

What would they have thought of the cane?!
They’d think our mothers were insane
I'd agree with them, though

What would they have thought of the cane?!
They’d think our mothers were insane
I'd agree with them, though
I deserved it more

What would they have thought of the cane?!
They’d think our mothers were insane
I'd agree with them, though
I deserved it more
But didn't like feeling the pain.

So "write fifty lines" teacher said

So "write fifty lines" teacher said
Or I’ll send you up to the Head

So "write fifty lines" teacher said
Or I’ll send you up to the Head
I'll not write those lines!

So "write fifty lines" teacher said
Or I’ll send you up to the Head
I'll not write those lines!
For making rude signs

So "write fifty lines" teacher said
Or I’ll send you up to the Head
I'll not write those lines!
For making rude signs
I will ask your Mum to attend.

Almost impossible to sleep

Almost impossible to sleep
I think downstairs I’ll have to creep

Almost impossible to sleep
I think downstairs I’ll have to creep
To slug a quick gin

Almost impossible to sleep
I think downstairs I’ll have to creep
To slug a quick gin
Throw ‘empty’ in bin

Almost impossible to sleep
I think downstairs I’ll have to creep
To slug a quick gin
Throw ‘empty’ in bin
And old grudges away I will sweep.

Now, folks are kinder to kids

Now, the folks are kinder to kids
That’s what every new law bids

Now, the folks are kinder to kids
That’s what every new law bids
Now kids seem to rule

Now, the folks are kinder to kids
That's what every new law bids
Now kids seem to rule
No more 'naughty stool'

Now, the folks are kinder to kids
That’s what every new law bids
Now kids seem to rule
No more “naughty stool”
Forbidden, banging of desk lids

Politics, what a week it’s been