More limericks with very strict rules and I'm standing by with a metre stick ;)

A new line please, L. Ravenscroft
Or are you busy in the loft?
We need some ideas
Come on, we're all eahs
Sadly, my brains have gone all soft.

This technology drives me mad

This technology drives me mad
‘Specially when they bring a new fad

This technology drives me mad
‘Specially when they bring a new fad
You’ve just got it sussed

This technology drives me mad
‘Specially when they bring a new fad
You’ve just got it sussed
But change it they must

This technology drives me mad
‘Specially when they bring a new fad
You’ve just got it sussed
But change it they must
You can’t afford new? That’s too bad!

When power lines are down, you can’t charge.

When power lines are down, you can’t charge,
Causing problems both trivial and large

When power lines are down, you can't charge
Causing problems both trivial and large
But please don't despair

When power lines are down, you can't charge
Causing problems both trivial and large
But please don't despair,
Let's hope they repair

When power lines are down, you can't charge
Causing problems both trivial and large
But please don't despair,
Let's hope they repair
Before the next surge (some say "sarge.")

This week is supposed to be warmer

This week is supposed to be warmer
The wind is quite a lot calmer

This week is supposed to be warmer
The wind is quite a lot calmer
But it's from the North East

This week is supposed to be warmer
The wind is quite a lot calmer
But it's from the North East
Is it called the Beast ?

Oh lets have a feast,

This week is supposed to be warmer
The wind is quite a lot calmer
But it's from the North East
Is it called the Beast ?
No, that’s creating a drama.

Upsetting news stories this week

Upsetting news stories this week
Disturbing the peace we all seek

Upsetting news stories this week
Disturbing the peace we all seek
Strikes, rapists, high bills

Upsetting news stories this week
Disturbing the peace we all seek
Strikes, rapists, high bills
Let's take to the hills!

Upsetting news stories this week
Disturbing the peace we all seek
Strikes, rapists, high bills
Let's take to the hills!
Must admit the outcome looks bleak

News from Turkey’s devastating

News from Turkey’s devastating
And ghastly for relatives waiting

News from Turkey’s devastating
And ghastly for relatives waiting,
They need so much help

News from Turkey’s devastating
And ghastly for relatives waiting,
They need so much help
So watching I want to yelp

News from Turkey’s devastating
And ghastly for relatives waiting,
They need so much help
So I want to yelp
Let's act and stop just debating.
(sorry. changed 4th line to comply with rules)

My uncle is here from Brazil

My uncle is here from Brazil
He says he comes over to chill

My uncle is here from Brazil
He says he comes over to chill
Our milder climate

My uncle is here from Brazil
He says he comes over to chill
Our milder climate
Suits ev’ry primate