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More limericks with very strict rules and I'm standing by with a metre stick ;)

(1001 Posts)
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LadyHonoriaDedlock Sun 18-Dec-22 13:02:27

Have we got time for another?
What, wine? Oh no let me recover
Well maybe a sherry
Gin from a berry
Or a drop of fine malt to discover

The children are tired and fractious

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Ashcombe Wed 01-Mar-23 07:04:07

Chocolate is tasty to us all
But likely to be my downfall
Just one teeny square
Then becomes a pair
It’s always had me in its thrall.

Dark chocolate is what I like most

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nanna8 Wed 01-Mar-23 07:13:31

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast

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NanKate Wed 01-Mar-23 10:03:24

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast
My waist is expanding

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henetha Wed 01-Mar-23 10:03:36

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast
Will it make me fat?

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crazyH Wed 01-Mar-23 10:23:39

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast
Will it make me fat?
I really doubt that

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lovebeigecardigans1955 Wed 01-Mar-23 14:52:14

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast
Will it make me fat?
I really doubt that
Of my slim figure I'll still boast.

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired

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NanKate Wed 01-Mar-23 18:52:33

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired
I only drink when I’m tired

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LadyHonoriaDedlock Wed 01-Mar-23 18:54:33

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired
I only drink when I’m tired
Then I bounce off the walls

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crazyH Wed 01-Mar-23 19:00:32

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired
I only drink when I’m tired
Then I bounce off the walls
Have countless more falls

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Jangran99 Wed 01-Mar-23 21:56:25

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired
I only drink when I’m tired
I bounce off the walls
Have countless more falls
Then abstinence is required.

But I’ll never give up ice cream

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Juliet27 Thu 02-Mar-23 06:27:40

But I’ll never give up ice cream
As it’s good for me it would seem!

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crazyH Thu 02-Mar-23 09:07:27

But I’ll never give up ice cream
As it’s good for me it would seem!
It gives me a boost

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Squiffy Thu 02-Mar-23 14:39:27

But I’ll never give up ice cream
As it’s good for me it would seem!
It gives me a boost
My belt is now loosed

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GoldenLady Thu 02-Mar-23 15:05:32

But I’ll never give up ice cream
As it’s good for me it would seem!
It gives me a boost
My belt is now loosed
And wall-bouncing is easier, it would seem.

Ice cream that has chocolate chips

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LadyHonoriaDedlock Thu 02-Mar-23 15:35:27

Ice cream that has chocolate chips
Puts a terrible load on the hips

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crazyH Thu 02-Mar-23 17:00:48

Ice cream that has chocolate chips
Puts a terrible load on the hips
Weight Watchers I’ll join

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Ashcombe Thu 02-Mar-23 21:09:25

Ice cream that has chocolate chips
Puts a terrible load on the hips
Weight Watchers I’ll join
Sweet treats I'll purloin

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Juliet27 Fri 03-Mar-23 07:13:47

Ice cream that has chocolate chips
Puts a terrible load on the hips
Weight Watchers I’ll join
Sweet treats I'll purloin
Though they should never pass my lips

Wandering round my local store

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Mollygo Fri 03-Mar-23 08:33:17

Wandering round my local store
Some fav'rites aren’t there any more

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GoldenLady Fri 03-Mar-23 15:40:40

Wandering round my local store
Some fav'rites aren’t there any more
But the new stuff is great

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Jangran99 Fri 03-Mar-23 17:56:51

Wandering round my local store
Some fav'rites aren’t there any more
But the new stuff’s great
A treat on my plate

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LadyHonoriaDedlock Fri 03-Mar-23 21:34:03

Wandering round my local store
Some fav'rites aren’t there any more
But the new stuff’s great
A treat on my plate
Since old stuff became such a bore

We mustn't feel sorry for Maisie

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Juliet27 Sat 04-Mar-23 07:07:48

We mustn't feel sorry for Maisie
In that awful advert for Daisy!

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Mollygo Sat 04-Mar-23 10:23:20

We mustn't feel sorry for Maisie
In that awful advert for Daisy!
‘Cos she’s getting paid

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Ali08 Sat 04-Mar-23 11:27:59

For she's getting paid
The garden's getting laid
Just in time for spring
So we can do our thing

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