More limericks with very strict rules and I'm standing by with a metre stick ;)

Chocolate is tasty to us all
But likely to be my downfall
Just one teeny square
Then becomes a pair
It’s always had me in its thrall.

Dark chocolate is what I like most

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast
My waist is expanding

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast
Will it make me fat?

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast
Will it make me fat?
I really doubt that

Dark chocolate is what I like most
Spread thickly on pieces of toast
Will it make me fat?
I really doubt that
Of my slim figure I'll still boast.

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired
I only drink when I’m tired

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired
I only drink when I’m tired
Then I bounce off the walls

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired
I only drink when I’m tired
Then I bounce off the walls
Have countless more falls

Two cups of coffee, I'm wired
I only drink when I’m tired
I bounce off the walls
Have countless more falls
Then abstinence is required.

But I’ll never give up ice cream

But I’ll never give up ice cream
As it’s good for me it would seem!

But I’ll never give up ice cream
As it’s good for me it would seem!
It gives me a boost

But I’ll never give up ice cream
As it’s good for me it would seem!
It gives me a boost
My belt is now loosed

But I’ll never give up ice cream
As it’s good for me it would seem!
It gives me a boost
My belt is now loosed
And wall-bouncing is easier, it would seem.

Ice cream that has chocolate chips

Ice cream that has chocolate chips
Puts a terrible load on the hips

Ice cream that has chocolate chips
Puts a terrible load on the hips
Weight Watchers I’ll join

Ice cream that has chocolate chips
Puts a terrible load on the hips
Weight Watchers I’ll join
Sweet treats I'll purloin

Ice cream that has chocolate chips
Puts a terrible load on the hips
Weight Watchers I’ll join
Sweet treats I'll purloin
Though they should never pass my lips

Wandering round my local store

Wandering round my local store
Some fav'rites aren’t there any more

Wandering round my local store
Some fav'rites aren’t there any more
But the new stuff is great

Wandering round my local store
Some fav'rites aren’t there any more
But the new stuff’s great
A treat on my plate

Wandering round my local store
Some fav'rites aren’t there any more
But the new stuff’s great
A treat on my plate
Since old stuff became such a bore

We mustn't feel sorry for Maisie

We mustn't feel sorry for Maisie
In that awful advert for Daisy!

We mustn't feel sorry for Maisie
In that awful advert for Daisy!
‘Cos she’s getting paid

For she's getting paid
The garden's getting laid
Just in time for spring
So we can do our thing