Grandson of New Limerick (Son of New Limerick contd.)

I wonder what will happen next
Nothing much, so I feel vexed
If I were in charge,
I would loom very large
and send Keir Starmer a text.

A rude van man heckled Ms Reeves

A rude van man heckled Ms Reeves
But she just rolled up her sleeves

A rude van man heckled Ms Reeves
But she just rolled up her sleeves
He backed off in fright

A rude van man heckled Ms Reeves
But she just rolled up her sleeves
He backed off in fright
A truly pitiful sight

A rude van man heckled Ms Reeves
But she just rolled up her sleeves
He backed of in fright
A truly pitiful sight
As Reeves in her sleeves a sigh heaves

Nigel F's been at it again

Nigel F’s been at it again
To some people he’s a real pain

Nigel F’s been at it again
To some people he’s a real pain
Take him or leave him

Nigel F’s been at it again
To some people he’s a real pain
Take him or leave him
But just don’t believe him

Nigel F’s been at it again
To some people he’s a real pain
Take him or leave him
But just don’t believe him
He's somewhat lacking in brain

There once was a granny with glasses

There once was a granny with glasses
Whose body contained many gasses

There once was a granny with glasses
Whose body contained many gases
Some left via her mouth

There once was a granny with glasses
Whose body contained many gases
Some left via her mouth

There once was a granny with glasses
Whose body contained many gases
Some left via her mouth
And others went south

There once was a granny with glasses
Whose body contained many gases
Some left via her mouth
And others went south
So she tried a quick cure of molasses.

I once saw my gran do the splits

I once saw my gran do the splits
Her corset it broke into bits

I once saw my gran do the splits
Her corset it broke into bits
She couldn't get up

I once saw my gran do the splits
Her corset it broke into bits
She couldn't get up
Got bit by the pup

I once saw my gran do the splits
Her corset it broke into bits
She couldn't get up
Got bit by the pup
"Enough now" said she, "I quits!"

A grumpy old man in the sun

A grumpy old man in the sun
Was certainly not having fun

A grumpy old man in the sun
Was certainly not having fun
But along came a cloud

A grumpy old man in the sun
Was certainly not having fun
But along came a cloud
With thunder so loud

A grumpy old man in the sun
Was certainly not having fun
But along came a cloud
With thunder so loud
And all he could do was run

The rain started falling so heavy

The rain started falling so heavy
I might as well go have a bevy

The rain started falling so heavy
I might as well go have a bevy
I went for a beer