Has anyone done DNA tests

hollysteers

silverlinings I had a similar experience with Ancestry. The Italian line mentioned by relatives never showed up (and many of us look Mediterranean!) Irish and English which I knew of.
Does this mean we only receive details of others who are on their database?

to answer your question ...yes. The results are only as good as the people who have tested. This grows year by year and Ancestry is best for a wide choice .

I agree Floradora. My husband's DNA was recently updated to include Mediterranean ethnicities which hadn't been mentioned before.

Did mine through ancestry and it confirmed everything. It covered close relations in USA, England and further back Eastern Europe. I am eagerly waiting for more people to test.

silverlining48

We have done it with heritage, not ancestry which seems predominantly US based.
Very disappointed, any contacts they send are 3-6 cousins I don’t recognise names and no one has approached me.

Also my own dna is not as I know it to be. The country of my mother and her ancestors is not even mentioned on the list.
I dont understand how that can possibly be. I should be 50% yet this country isn’t mentioned.

During World War 2, a lot of people from Poland managed to get to the United Kingdom.

After the war, as many had fought on our side, they were allowed to settle here, initially housed on military sites converted to temporary housing, on sites vacated by Canadian troops who went home after the war.

Marriages took place, children were born. If those children tended to marry people from the same community, then by now there may well be descendants.

If a married couple from amongst those descendants, in the 1980s emigrated to, say, the USA and their grandchild, who, along with his parents, were born in the USA, and the grandchild knew that his grandparents came from the United Kingdom, the grandchild might be surprised about no UK DNA but lots of Polish DNA.

This could be complicated by the fact that some Polish people who settled permanently in the UK changed their surname by deed poll to something UK-sounding so that upon getting married and having children, their descendants would grow up in the UK, speak English, have an English surname, which they considered best for them.

I am no expert on this but I think that I saw somewhere about people fleeing Tsarist Russia in the 1800s and settling in France.

So, whether such a thing happened with some of your ancestors, or whether the results are erroneous, maybe the answer will be found.

You can increase your chances of finding a relative by downloading your Ancestry results to other databases, including a worldwide master database (can't remember the name). That is how they do it on the DNA lost relatives programmes.

I would love to do a DNA test to find close relatives that I don’t know about, but am rather anxious about it.
I am also a tadge cynical because the results showing the countries one’s forbears have originated are generalisations dependant on how many people are on the chosen site’s data base, so may not be that significant.
I never knew my birth father, and his family may have no knowledge of me but although I’m curious, am wary of opening a can of worms.
Can anyone suggest the best DNA site if I decide to pursue this?

Farzanah. The chances of you finding close relatives is a long shot depending on if they have also taken tests.

You say you did not know your birth father but do you know his name, roughly when he was born and where? In other words, could you try to build a family tree for him through ordinary family history research methods? You would only need to discover who his parents were and whether he had siblings to reveal the names of first cousins. If you (and he) are or were in England or Wales, you might be able to achieve that without any financial outlay through a free site such as FreeBMD or even with a short free trial on Ancestry.

If you don’t know that much, another way round would be to take a DNA test through Ancestry. This might reveal more distant cousins say third, fourth of fifth who are also members of Ancestry. Then you can work back through their family trees to find the common ancestor. Working forward from that person could reveal closer blood relatives who might not be Ancestry members. That would be a more discreet way of tackling this without revealing who you are. Your user name on Ancestry need not be your real name plus information about living people is concealed.

I’ve done Ancestry for family tree purposes and Living DNA to get more of an idea of our female origins. My daughter found her father’s half brothers and family plus she now knows who her natural grandfather was. This was a happy ever after for her.

Not very long ago I received a match from LivingDNA. As an only child I’d always wanted a sibling. It seems there is someone out there who shares almost 50% of their dna with me. I wrote and introduced myself but never heard anything back. I’m still feeling disappointed they didn’t respond. Hey ho, maybe another generation a bit further down the line will be able to solve the mystery.

I’ve done my DNA via Ancestry. Turns out I have a 1st cousin that I didn’t know about. Fortunately he has the same surname (and odd spelling) as my Godfather so it gave me a pointer. My best guess is that the man I knew to be my Dad may not be. There are many hits on my Mum’s side but nothing for my Dad’s side. I need to contact my potential sister but how do I say, ‘Hi, remember me? Your Dad was my Godfather but actually might be my Dad!’ It’s been a shock but I guess I just need to know the truth now.

Farzanah

I would love to do a DNA test to find close relatives that I don’t know about, but am rather anxious about it.
I am also a tadge cynical because the results showing the countries one’s forbears have originated are generalisations dependant on how many people are on the chosen site’s data base, so may not be that significant.
I never knew my birth father, and his family may have no knowledge of me but although I’m curious, am wary of opening a can of worms.
Can anyone suggest the best DNA site if I decide to pursue this?

If you are British then Ancestry seems to have the best database.
Whilst ethnicity is very vague and, as you say, totally dependent on the composition of the database, when it comes down to matches in DNA you are dealing with facts.
If you have matches you can be sure they are family members. Close matches are incontrovertible, as you get further away the link is definite but there are a few possibilities, a first to second cousin could be from different generations so removed cousins or share only one ancestor so half cousins. They will definitely be cousins.
I can’t see why you should be anxious about this. The past is just that, the past. You have no control over it, you are not responsible for it. It is history.
I have found it hugely enjoyable discovering the history of my family. I have cried over the early deaths of babies, marvelled at how many offspring the women had, puzzled over why some moved long distances when most families seemed to stay within a very small radius of where they were born. There’re are always more facts to uncover, more stories to be told.
I hope you do it and enjoy the research.

ayse has mentioned something important. Even if you find someone who is closely related by DNA there is no guarantee they will answer when you write. I have not found anyone close, but have written to numerous people over the years, either DNA contacts or family tree contacts. Nine out of ten do not reply! Possibly even more. It is very frustrating but there is nothing you can do. Imagine finding a full or half sibling and they don't reply. There are a lot of people who go on there for a while in a burst of enthusiasm and then just stop for whatever reason we don't know. Either lost interest or maybe even died. There are a great many Ancestry profiles of people who do not participate any more.

ayse

I’ve done Ancestry for family tree purposes and Living DNA to get more of an idea of our female origins. My daughter found her father’s half brothers and family plus she now knows who her natural grandfather was. This was a happy ever after for her.

Not very long ago I received a match from LivingDNA. As an only child I’d always wanted a sibling. It seems there is someone out there who shares almost 50% of their dna with me. I wrote and introduced myself but never heard anything back. I’m still feeling disappointed they didn’t respond. Hey ho, maybe another generation a bit further down the line will be able to solve the mystery.

ayse It depends how often you DNA matches look at their site. Ancestry does not remind me of up dates, I am only aware of them if I click on my site which I forget to do.

Chestnut

ayse has mentioned something important. Even if you find someone who is closely related by DNA there is no guarantee they will answer when you write. I have not found anyone close, but have written to numerous people over the years, either DNA contacts or family tree contacts. Nine out of ten do not reply! Possibly even more. It is very frustrating but there is nothing you can do. Imagine finding a full or half sibling and they don't reply. There are a lot of people who go on there for a while in a burst of enthusiasm and then just stop for whatever reason we don't know. Either lost interest or maybe even died. There are a great many Ancestry profiles of people who do not participate any more.

Imagine my surprise in the middle of last night when not sleeping and checking my emails I found a reply from the almost certain half sister who was also intrigued. I suspect my dad was playing away as we both share a paternal relative.

Anyway, I’m going to write back and see where it might take me/us. As an only child I’d be very happy to find a half sibling and maybe some extra family.

As Chestnut says people don’t necessarily answer your queries. I’ve tried not to do this to people looking for information but it can be difficult. Relatively recently I did respond to a distant cousin query. We found our family link whilst identifying the most likely candidate to be his great grandfather. It took 6 months of collaborative research across 3 continents but it was fun.

Farzanah

I would love to do a DNA test to find close relatives that I don’t know about, but am rather anxious about it.
I am also a tadge cynical because the results showing the countries one’s forbears have originated are generalisations dependant on how many people are on the chosen site’s data base, so may not be that significant.
I never knew my birth father, and his family may have no knowledge of me but although I’m curious, am wary of opening a can of worms.
Can anyone suggest the best DNA site if I decide to pursue this?

I’d suggest Ancestry is probably the best site to use initially. It would probably be helpful if you did your mother’s side of the family tree as it would help you eliminate those matches from the patriarchal matches.

Yes, Ancestry is the best for DNA. My results are spot on because I know my mother was 100% Welsh and that has been verified. Very accurate!
You can then download your results to GEDmatch which gives you a better chance of finding a relative.
How to use GEDmatch

Thank you Chestnut, I'm in touch with someone in the US and they asked if I was on GEDmatch. Will walk the dog and do it when I return!

Thank you so much to everyone who has replied to my query, it is so helpful, and I think I will take the plunge with Ancestry.
I do know vague details about my birth father but it was kept very much a family secret. My mother has never disclosed anything, although she was married to him for a short time! She now has dementia so too late.
I think most people, if only out of curiosity, feel that they would like to know their roots.

If your mother was married to him for a short while it should be fairly easy to trace him, his ancestors and any subsequent children, starting with the details on the marriage certificate.

Open University do a great (free) course on how to research your ancestry with tasks etc and an online tutor. Excellent to set you on the right path, but you have to be dedicated. Good luck!

Yes GSM. I know that would be the best route, but this has been such a huge family secret which my mother would not disclose, and it’s hard to explain, but I feel very constrained about upsetting the status quo and my (step) siblings by following this through.

I kind of thought I’d try the DNA route and just hope someone on my father’s side may contact me. As I say they may not even know of my existence, but I know he had other children.
I think it’s something which I need to do before I die, but am anxious about it.

I don’t think the chances of someone contacting you are that high tbh. I haven’t received (or made) any contacts. My husband received an email from someone who was a distant cousin that he decided not to respond to.
Personally I would do a bit of quiet research and say nothing to family members who might prefer to let sleeping dogs lie.

Farzanah

Yes GSM. I know that would be the best route, but this has been such a huge family secret which my mother would not disclose, and it’s hard to explain, but I feel very constrained about upsetting the status quo and my (step) siblings by following this through.

I kind of thought I’d try the DNA route and just hope someone on my father’s side may contact me. As I say they may not even know of my existence, but I know he had other children.
I think it’s something which I need to do before I die, but am anxious about it.

Don't be anxious. Remember the truth is everything.