Baby shower gifts

I'm struggling with this day6 if you have already bought the pram and car seat what big item she needs money for? Surely in deciding to have a baby they must have realised they would need to provide for it? I do get irritated by young people today who feel they have a right to expect others to provide. We recently received a wedding invitation asking for money for gifts which doesn't sit well with me the bride's sister also had a baby shower with expected gifts then looked for gift when baby was born followed by christening invitation with details of child's bank account all within three months! A one line " thanks to everyone who gave presents" on Facebook was only acknowledgement!

I tried to arrange a restrained family one in a quiet restaurant because I wanted a meet up with the ladies of the families, but illness struck and we needed up with a nice lunch for future mum and the 2 future grans. I took along a baby hand modelling picture kit and milestone cards, and saved the bulky stuff I have for the time of the birth. The planned little activities didn't happen when there was no longer a group of us.

My DDiL had a surprise baby shower. It was organised by a good friend from her Uni days, and DDiL had a wonderful time!
DS took her out in the morning, and as soon as they were gone I started getting their house ready, her friend arrived with banners, balloons, silly games etc. Other people brought extra chairs, her mum, friend and I provided buffet food.
DS brought her back at a pre arranged time, and as they drove down the road, we were all waiting on their drive. She was really overwhelmed at first as she had no clue at all that it had been arranged, but when she recovered she had a wonderful afternoon!
Gifts were not compulsory, but most people bought things such as muslin cloths, bibs, blankets etc.
It was lovely for her to be able to see so many of her friends and family and we had a really good time, there was a lot of laughter!

If they're a US import to the UK, just imagine in Germany which is one step further removed!

Having said that, a friend of my DiL did organise a baby shower for her and my first grandchild and it was lovely. The first date she picked would have been entirely a surprise, at the other grandmother's house, and was all arranged with the other grandmother and other friends. But the baby was 3 weeks early and it had to be cancelled.

So we had it after the event, and it wasn't a surprise. The silly games had included changing a nappy on a doll blindfolded. So this was changed to changing the nappy on the baby blindfolded! There were lots of other silly games (tasting and guessing the ingredients of baby food jars, again blindfolded) and a few small presents.

However, some people had a problem getting their head round the idea. My sister-in-law (future great-aunt) was invited and she thought it would be something like a tupperware party.

The school-leaving prom always was a tradition here in Germany, except that they don't have to pick partners. Choosing the dresses is quite a big part, but the main point of it is letting their hair down and everyone doing a little party piece on the stage. They start fund-raising activities (usually parties and discos) some 2-3 years ahead of the event.

JackyB having a leaving school prom is okish but its when it starts in Nursery, Primary and Middle schools that I find ridiculous..

I agree, Luckygirl. We get their spellings, their customs, their tv programmes, even the tail end of their weather sometimes. We should give them back!

Good fun, any excuse for a party! No need to go if you disapprove. I made a 'nappy cake ' for both my DGDs, very easy to do (see YouTube), costs a packet of new born nappies, a packet of small elastic bands, 2 mtr of ribbon, cake board, cellophane and some patience. You can add small gifts if you want but it makes a big impact as it is and is very useful of course. Enjoy

I'm about to package up a box of goodies for the new grandson of a good friend, who has arrived safely. (They live a very long way away.)
I was specially asked not to send it before he had safely arrived, which was fair enough.

I've always thought that large scale baby showers tempted fate, slightly. Things don't always go to plan - and there are some stories of sheer greed here, which doesn't surprise me.

In Germany, you never wish someone 'Happy Birthday' before the day, it's seen as being really bad luck to do so. There would seem to be more logic in not having a massive baby shower with large gifts, if one believes in not tempting fate.

Get togethers with cake, fun, laughter and token SMALL gifts are a wonderful idea.

I supplied most of the items for my firstborn and wouldn't have dreamed of asking anybody else to do so.
For No 2 as well as small gifts, I bought some good quality items from friends - these were bought, not given, everything was relatively more expensive then and they couldn't afford to just give things away.

Tbf I believe in America you do bring only very small presents and the focus is on relaxing and playing silly games
DD has been invited to one where it's the mother you bring (very small ) prezzies for .Again focus is in fames,eating. It follows a'blessing/purification'ceremony for her and partner .Different culture but sounds nice .

I felt obliged to go to the baby shower before my son's baby was born. I won't go to another one. I will just say that I don't "do" them.

I recently hosted a baby shower for my DD. Not at all mercenery. I didn't do it for the gifts she could receive but it was a great way for family and friends to have a chance to meet up, have a few drinks, and have a laugh- just a good excuse for a party. It is not really a new thing from the USA , we had gift giving at work on the last day before Mat leave started decades ago- this was just a lot more fun!!! Just don't try to go down the one upmanship route with presents and enjoy the day for what it is.

I was uneasy about baby showers until I started to be invited to them. Great fun, very relaxed, games and lots of love and laughter amongst a large group of close friends, many friendships going back to when the young mums to be were 2 and met their pals at play group. The silly games were fun, lots of goodies to nibble at and lots of love and laughter. The mother to be was given practical gifts (endless supplies of nappies, baby bath stuff, nipple cream and baby grows etc etc) - what's not to like. I'd have to be a real grumpy grannie not to host these things for my daughters and their pals.

Lots of interesting views here but I am still not convinced baby showers are for me! It's true that I am of a generation that didn't buy presents for parents or child until the baby had been safely born.

The need to make pregnancy special is also strange, although I suppose we are more enlightened today. I worked until a few weeks before my first was due. Partner's DIL is milking her pregnancy for all it's worth it seems to me. Perhaps I am being uncharitable but she needs her man to wait on her hand and foot, and he does. She is forever sleepy, needing naps, he does all the housework, and when out he HAS to help her out of her chair. She is six and a half months pregnant. I appreciate carrying around extra weight is uncomfortable and tiring but perhaps my generation was made of stronger stuff, and our menfolk weren't so thoughtful and diligent? We got on with it, feeling excited but not expecting to be princesses the world had to acknowledge.

Every occasion has to be marked, photographed and publicised now, thanks to social media. I think we are in danger of not finding much special at all if we have to have a party for everyday ordinary events. I find it all quite false, expensive and contrived.

I put together a box of baby necessities, trinkets, silly things and favourite perfume for my own daughter, and gave them to her over a cup of tea when baby was born and she was feeling exhausted. She said the best present was having an afternoon nap whilst I minded the little one.

We had a baby shower for Dd3 organised by her sisters. There was no expectation of gifts although most people bought a small one. We had a buffet and played some silly games , all baby related. A fun afternoon for all the 'girls'.

Agree never been to a baby shower but all the lovely things you have made you should take them too. I loved things that are made by family when I left work to have my eldest child a lady knitted me lots of lovely things and I was so thrilled cause I can't knit for toffee. So take them I am sure they will be well received.

I do prefer to give presents after a baby is born just in case. I do remember a friend who had everything and her showing me through every drawer after the baby died.

As I understand it, the origin of a "shower" was that the girl's friends (bride-to-be or mother-to-be) would put suitable tiny presents in an umbrella (or more likely a pinata or similar) which was then opened out and the recipient was "showered" with them. This must have been about the 50s, so, of course, the idea has ballooned out since them.

I've been been to one, but DD has attended some for her friends (she didn't have one herself due to DGD being premature so we were sat round the incubator on the day instead!) and they just had a nice girlie gathering and the gifts were small things like babygros/bodysuits/socks etc.

Oh, next import from the US ... gender reveal parties!!!!

Im sorry but all the young people i no including my two sons and there wives are all grasping.Its as if just because were the grandparents we have to spend spend spend

My DD missed her baby shower organised by her best friend as baby came 9 weeks early! It would have been cup cakes and games and a girly time. She got the gifts (practical things) anyway and her friend had made a beautiful nappy cake which was very handy later. We ended up with emergency visits to Lewises and Mothercare etc for preemie nappies and vests etc for when DGS came out his incubator! Though NNU had knitted blankets and cardigans and hats for the teenies!

Baby showers are always really difficult to buy for especially when the parents don't know whether the baby is a boy or girl. When I searched many of the gifts were from the USA so cost a great deal in postage charges. After a little delving I discovered this UK based company that did unisex gifts which are perfect for such occasion The Baby Box Company. I've ordered a couple from there now, and have been really good value and nicely wrapped up.