Had the fostering panel today and it went really well!!!
I was so calm till I got there and walked into the room , even though the 9 people seemed nice some looked a bit stern / grumpy! lol
Then they asked me all the questions they had which was fine and I answered them all but just at the end I had a huge migraine suddenly come on ( think it was the stress and pressure and emotional build up ) as it was really intense as in one minute I was drinking Earl Grey tea in the cafe next door with the assessor lady and the next we had a call saying we were late ( they got the time wrong to the assessor lady! ) so we went next door and then pretty much straight into panel , it felt like the most important interview of my whole life and more and I answered one question after the other which wasn't too bad until right at the end the headache coming on , but I didn't sleep that well last night and there has been months of build up to this very important day so my brain packed in after the last of the 10 questions! lol 
On the whole I did pretty well and we went outside for just a few minutes , was called back in and the panel chair said I had passed unanimously and it was smiles all round!! 
I told them that news was better than winning the lottery and am sure they could tell I meant it , was grinning from ear to ear and thanking them and they thanked me for what I was doing for my GS
I walked up to the shops with the assesor lady and we bumped into the co chair who said THEY WERE IMPRESSED WITH ME!!!
Feeling tearful now and it was all a bit of a blur and seemed to happen so fast like a tsunami but am glad I can relax and enjoy lo now
Unfortunately when I left the assessor lady to go and do some shopping I suddenly felt sick and had to throw up in a corner but it just shows the emotional intensity of it all as this was SO important to me and had been hanging over my head for 6 months tbh plus it went from calm to intense in a few short seconds lol ... I went straight home and rested up and will continue to rest up as this is the most important thing I have ever done in my life and my GS and my future happiness was resting on this day...
SO glad it went so well though even with feeling ill after lol the questions weren't too bad and there was a very positive vibe in the room even though it was formal and they seemed delighted to tell me the news ... I myself am a mix of ( good ) emotions including still being in shock and ELATED and it has not actually sunk in yet tbh but am sure it will and am so glad the PRESSURE is off and I keep feeling tearful when I think about the fact that they were impressed with me! Mind you I have and am putting a lot of work in and it has paid off .... All those months of dire heartache before he was placed with me to THIS = PASSING panel so his placement is SECURE and I can relax and know his happiness will remain and continue , it means the world to me it really does and I have a feeling all the love and care and positivity I have inside came across to the panel and am so glad it was unanimous too! xx
- take care of yourself. The future is now secure for you and for your gs 
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