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We are devistated, I don't know where to start. But need help,my daughter has got with this man who is very controlling to the point that he isolates her from everyone and then disappears leaving her to cope alone. She has had two Lil angels in quick consesion eg 11 months apart. Aged 2 and 1.
Whilt isolated with two very young children and with a history of drug abuse she turned to alcohol 24/7 and began huffing butane gas, eg 10 a day to cut a very long story short.In August 2016 We and my other daughter were given the girls by social services and a care plan was put in place. The girls flourished and began to thrive and interact with many things as we cared for them. We were told the girls would be returned about January 2018, if all plans had been achieved by the parents, eg drug free parenting classes ect.
Social services supported my daughter in getting a bigger council house and we thought things were going to plan.
However, he stopped me and gran gran from attending meetings and started making up stuff about us and the daughter that was actually caring for the girls. He has narsistic tendencies, which the social worker has not noted and has been taken in by him and has supported all his wishes. At the time we had the girls so I knew they were safe with us. They started having contact alone for couple hrs couple times a week, and on the day of my daughters move to a 3bed house, we asked them to have the girls from 10am to 4pm in order that they would not witness the disruption of the move. All good moving forward looking forward to more room and a big garden for them to play in. This was May 5th 2017, a day that distroyed me, half way through the move we had a phone call saying the girls would not be coming back as the parents had actioned their parental rights and refused to return them. Social Services said their hands were tied and could only support them.
This is where it all went horribly wrong. Of course we still needed to see the girls but gran gran and myself were refused any contact, ss supported this!!! And my daughter and her husband and son who had cared for them for 9 mths were only allowed supervised contact.
We have tried to get contact but each time they and social services have put a wall up. And still will not give reasons as to why they allowed those angels to be dragged from pillar to post without giving valid reasons. The sw just goes along with their father as he's very good at manipulation and cover ups. But we need to know they are safe and that she will not be isolated again and history repeat it's self. So we have filed an arrangement order with the case being heard 29th Aug, I have prepared the papers as best I can and we are doing this alone without a solicitor. But we are all so worried for the girls and it can't come soon enough in the hope the judge and caffcass do the right thing and let's our bond with the girls continue.
Questions......
A. I feel their is an obligation by ss to facilitate contact or to maintain it, am I right ?
B.Ifa care plan is in place can it just be disregarded at the wishes of those with pr even though there was clearly a need for it to be followed ?
C. I have asked for contact every Sunday and once a mth a fri to Sunday stay over and to give our continued support should it all go belly up again.Will we get this?
As you can see we are all so worried and know nothing, I'm trying to get as many reports and statements from police health visitor ect to back up us having contact, as the court have asked the sw for her recommendations which we feel will be no contact as they are being manipulated by the father. We as their maternal grandparents really want to be part of their lives and mix the sweethearts so so much, emotionally we are all wrecks so we dread to think how this has affected the girls, they must be traumatised, but all we get is there are no professional concerns, which tell us nothing... Please help with any information that can help us to see our angels. Thank you.... Nanny and gran gran xxx7
Musicman I had all my papers prepared for the 3rd court hearing, but the judge told me to put them all away and not to read them! Think she had already made up her mind the outcome. I also took photos, to show how close & loving a little family we were, before all this, which included my other D, her sister, wasn't allowed to show those either!
It just feels that even though we have brought our own children up to adulthood that we are under the microscope, but we are the ones that know our children's characters good and bad. I certainly wouldn't be doing this just to piss everyon e off, we do it to be there for our grandchildren as we have seen the neglect or harm they have been through. Why can't the court see that xx
Someone said that they are not in our world, but their own little cut-off world from normal life, so therefore little understanding!
At last success. Been to final hearing, Judge awarded grandparents contact order for initial 2hrs at contact centre for 3 months and then 2hrs every month in the comunity. all allegations against us not proven by way of social services visit. To all grandparents. never give up.
Congratulations musicman, will you all be able to go to the contact visits, your other daughter and her husband as well? I do hope it all goes well.
Many congratulations musicman
Why not me 
Congratulations musicman! But Iv rarely heard of a gp visitation case being resolved that easily. You are very lucky!
A gp seeking visitation isn't seen the same as a non-custodial parent seeking it, I don't think. Parents have a better chance. So the poster whose ds is trying to get a contact order has a better chance of seeing her gc again (through ds), imo, than most gps do when they file themselves. Idk for sure, but that's what I think.
And even then, from what Iv heard & read, these cases are often drawn out, Suzi. Imo, you'll need to expect that. You, also, nannynoo. Musicman's quick success is very unusual, as far as I know.
Yoga - just an opinion here - no concrete knowledge on my part - but I imagine a lot depends on the details of the case and whether there are things that can be proven or disproven. If the parents make accusations that can be measured - alcohol abuse, for example - like in musicman's case, those can be investigated and disproved. But if the parents say, for example, the gp favors one gc over another or undermines their parenting, or something like that, how can that be proven? So I imagine then, the judge just goes by what the parents say. Idk, of course, but I think something like that happened to you, especially without a solicitor there to help. So sorry.
Suzi and nannynoo, hoping for the best! And same to the gp whose ds is seeking visits (sorry, forgot your name) and anyone else here I might have missed!
its up to the courts to decide if there is a genuine reason not to allow contact. it is for the grandchildrens good and upbringing to see their extended family. as long as there is no risk to the child. the law has changed this year. if you are good and honest grandparents then there is every chance to win the fight. social services have to prove if there is a risk or not. its their report that is the game changer.
everyone gets emotional on cases like this. we represented ourselves. my advice. Know the law and childrens rights. keep evidence of everything. dont rely on phone calls. make everyone know you have admissable evidence. (apart from the judge.he wont be interested yet). read everything. highlight things that are not right in reports. these are legal docs and should be 100 accurate.keep calm. dont ask for much. our is 2 hrs a month. better than nothing. in fact we didnt celebrate the result.
Just thought I'd post part of my pm to musicman:
This makes me even sadder that I didn't get permission to ask for visitation rights, after going to court 3 times. I didn't get a visit from social services, but was involved with Caffcass, as is required.
Like you, I am just a normal grandparent, no drink, no drugs, I live on my own with my little dog, so no reason not to see my beloved GC. You seem to have sailed through, fairly easily, so well done you.
I didn't see any reports and didn't see their statement, yet they saw mine! Seems I was very unlucky as well as unlucky with the third judge I had.
As I've already said musicman, I wish you much joy & happiness with your beloved grandchildren xx
"... in fact we didnt celebrate the result."
I'm not surprised, MM. "2 hrs a month" - probably way less than you wanted. Iv read this before, grandparents going to court and getting visitation but still being a bit disappointed with the result.
"... better than nothing."
I'm glad you appreciate that! Enjoy every minute!
Musicman that's wonderful to hear and makes me wish we had pursued it, however after 9 years I guess we left it too long we kept hoping and praying our daughter would change her mind and we didn't want to lose her.
We kept sending gifts cards all these years despite 2 born never seen.
My daughter was going to bring up my history of depression and all sorts of muck but From what you said allegations have to be proved.
My gp said at time that wasn't a good enough reason.
However my dh really didn't want any fighting in court.
Sadly we not even been allowed photos of little ones.
I am so pleased 2hrs a month is something
.
Was it your daughter or son who denied contact if u don't mind me asking?
Are there any other success stories out there from gp getting to see their gc via the court?
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