worried about GD

I’m amazed that so many are saying “ it’s not your concern etc”
As the welfare & wellbeing of a grandchild is surely not only a GP concern but a priority if the situation is as this post .
To see a GC living in this type of what appears to be “ sqalour” is a major concern . Slime in a drinking cup , come on if you took your GC to nursery & found this you would be reporting it !
So what is the difference ?
I would definatley be taking action .

I'm quite surprised, considering there are people who open public doors with their elbows, and so on...

As someone who had a mother like this and was raised in slummy conditions - I hated it, as did my sister. When you go to school and people are holding their noses around you or you never have friends past the doorstep because the house looks like a pre “How clean is your house” programme ....... you can all do the “it’s none of your business” and “a few germs never hurt anyone” but I can tell you in a few years that child will be miserable in those conditions.

Same applies to nursery and preschool and really once a habit is formed it tends to follow on and on. I know a family who live in constant chaos. The eldest daughter who is 11 told me she won't invite her friends around because she does not want them to see her home. They live in a very small house and have 4 children so just not enough room for all of them with 2 bedrooms. 2 children sleep in dining room and so family eats in lounge. Cleaning never seems to happen and really there is nowhere to put all of their stuff. I have offered to help her clean her kitchen as I think she is depressed but I expect it would take days and where to put all of the stuff. Personally I would throw some stuff away and try to keep only absolutely necessary things. I babysit occasionally and when I do I wash up two sinks full of dishes and clean the surface but have to put the clean dishes back on surface as kitchen is so small and very few cupboards. So much stuff on floor you have to move it all before you can vacuum. I feel desperately sorry for them all and eldest daughter comes to see me sometimes and we have tea and cake and she has told me sometimes she just likes to get away form it all. I just try to provide her a little bolt hole when it all gets too much for her.

NanaTuesday I am not sure we are all saying its not the grans concern, the problem is if she goes in all guns blazing she may find that her DD or the BF tell her where to go so a much more careful approach is needed to ensure she can keep visiting and keep an eye on things whilst clearing up and cleaning as she goes. I must say the black mould is worrying and something should be done about that. I like the idea of a one off clean.

Thank goodness the young girl has you newnanny.
As has been stated, a bit of dirt never hurt anyone, which is true but for a child to have no choice in the matter and be brought up in squalor is not good at all.
Apart from the health risks, if the floors are covered in rubbish, there will a tripping hazard and if a fire broke out with all the rubbish around, they would struggle to get out, putting their lives at risk.
I certainly couldn't ignore, if my Dgc were in this position.

Hi my DD is also very untidy allergic to cleaning and ironing ! But there is so much love and fun in their home so I just clean up a bit when I'm there and take the good clothes home and iron them !

A little bit of dirt never did any child any harm!. You have said your bit so now I think you should stay on the sidelines and say no more. If you live nearby then maybe you could offer to help your DD with some cleaning, but if you continue to criticise you risk not being able to see your DGD at all. Sounds like the house might be a bit damp, has she got enough money to heat it properly?. Maybe you could help with that!.

If you think the child is in danger speak to her GP and social services, they will never reveal from where the information came.

I am very fussy re clean house/beds made/hoovering done/clothes ironed /aired etc.(as was my mother) My daughter has not taken after us regarding housework,but I have to say my grandaughter has never gone out in dirty unironed clothes/has always been well fed(even to the point of buying food that my daughter wont eat,but grandaughter loves eg everything that is fresh/dinners/good stuff.)She is loved knows she is safe and has empathy with others,has good manners,and is talked to and listened to.In other words my daughter is a brilliant/caring(maybe over protective)mother.So ok I see things that need clearing/cleaning/sorting.I do these things when Im there.haha

Ok, here's my 2 cent's worth. Nagging never, ever made an intrinsically untidy person tidy.
Nor, if they don't clean up, will that change just because a concerned mu/gran voice her disapproval.
In my opinion, it would just make them even more determined not to do as advised.

This is a life-long problem, this lassie has never been tidy or scrupulously clean even when she lived at home.

I suspect she's doing her best, even though it doesn't look that way to someone whose standards are totally different.
We're allowed to be different and as far as the OP knows, the little girl is happy. That's the main thing.

If this were me, I'd stay silent, or even compliment my DD on how happy and well adjusted her wee girl is.
It could be so, so much worse.

PS:
I used to have a friend who regularly 'helped' her daughter by nipping in to her apartment, unasked, and doing the washing up, laundry etc. Daughter repeatedly asked her not to. She totally ignored her because my friend's standards were high and she couldn't bear to think of her DD untidy home.

That lady, now in her late 60's is totally alone because she has ruined the relationship between herself and her daughter who took away her key and for the past year has even refused to speak to her mother.

Social Services would be run off their feet if every grubby smelly home was reported.

Can I just point out that it isn't always the " run-down " of society that get reported and who are found to be abusive and neglectful !

I agree...our grandchild at 9 is not made to shower, bathe or brush her teeth and wears filthy dirty clothing for no other reason than her Moms laziness. She is now getting bullied at school. It’s good for kids to be exposed to germs, dirt and messy play, but there is a difference when at the end of a fun day that child is not bathed and is put into a filthy bed to sleep. Our granddaughter has suffered numerous UTI’s because of not bathing and wearing faeces smeared underwear.

I love the thought of Gabriella standing at her door making workmen put plastic bags on their feet ???? best thought I ve had all day

To be honest a lot of the answers have gone way over the top of what the original post was stating which was about her clothes smelling of food and fags and her cup not being very clean Now we ve gone to thoroughly neglected children lying in stinking beds with fithy underwear we ve never a long way from the opening problem