From reading all these stories it seems communication is key, as is feeling quite able to say “no” and not feel guilty. I care for two of my grandchildren on two separate days, and have said from the outset that I want to still take holidays while my partner, who has PD, is still able. My daughters and sons in law have never thought this unreasonable, and have other family around who can take care of the children when I am away. My other daughter who lives some distance away, however, gets cross if I say I can’t travel to care for her daughter when her childcare breaks down (she has a nanny.) I have tried to explain how different the scenarios are, but she still tries to make me feel guilty. Some you win, and some you lose. The only saving grace is that when these parents reach their sixties and seventies they will realise how exhausting childcare is at our age!