Boasting Rights

I know an elderly lady who keeps boasting about how many grandchildren and great-children she has (19 at the last count).

I refrained from commenting on World overpopulation and the Earth's resources.

My grandchildren, now young adults, have caused my son and DIL a lot of grief one way or another in more recent years. I think we are over the worst now. Not all news is good news.
My youngest. now 16, is still kind, honest, responsible, thoughtful, and just now, working hard for his exams. No specific achievements to boast about, just a lovely lad. My daughter is a proud mum.

I am very proud of the way my DS and particularly DiLs are bringing them up. Perhaps I should tell them that....

Yes, JackyB - tell them. Especially tell your daughter-in-law.
Mums and dads need someone to appreciate them and it will be so lovely for your daughter-in-law to know that person is you.

I’m proud and relieved that our daughter and their partners love their children and are giving them secure happy childhoods.
I’m a doting grannie - all four youngsters for tea tonight. I’m also wicked grannie because I’m serving freezer tea- nuggets, chips, sausages some mash and chopped up raw veg, carrots, tomatoes, cucumber, apples strawberries, mango and yoghurts. I always cooked for their mothers as children but I’ve a busy day and I know they;ll clear the lot happily.
I have close friendswho are doting but I don’t see as boasting. Our adult children and grandchildren are similar ages, our friendships 40-50 long so we’ve been through tough as well as happy times. We share worries, is X dyslexic like their mum, will X be worried by Sats, etc.

I’m very proud just to be a granny and to see how well my son and daughter in law are bringing up my little granddaughter.

Callistemon21

I know an elderly lady who keeps boasting about how many grandchildren and great-children she has (19 at the last count).

I refrained from commenting on World overpopulation and the Earth's resources.

Are you sure that wasn’t my MiL?
Oh no, she had 22 great grandchildren and 13 grandchildren!
She was very proud of that.
But she was a very sweet lady and sadly missed.

maddyone

Callistemon21

I know an elderly lady who keeps boasting about how many grandchildren and great-children she has (19 at the last count).

I refrained from commenting on World overpopulation and the Earth's resources.

Are you sure that wasn’t my MiL?
Oh no, she had 22 great grandchildren and 13 grandchildren!
She was very proud of that.
But she was a very sweet lady and sadly missed.

Oh sorry, maddyone

No, she's probably a bit younger than that (late 80s) but it's the way she looks at me pityingly because I don't have 35 grandchildren and 103 great-grandchildren

No need to apologise Calli, we used to smile at her boasting pride at the sheer number of grandchildren and great grandchildren she had.

Of course we added to the number by having three children of our own, but we only have four grandchildren.

Callistemon21

I know an elderly lady who keeps boasting about how many grandchildren and great-children she has (19 at the last count).

I refrained from commenting on World overpopulation and the Earth's resources.

Apologies. To me the numbers are facts, many are happy accidents of course, I hope never to be viewed as bragging.

GabriellaG54

The bare truth is, that I am no more really interested in what friends or other people's GC have achieved than they are in mine, therefore I delicately brush off polite enquiries so that I don't have to reciprocate.
I bet people wouldn't be so forthcoming about their failures...eh?

I believe modesty is a good trait.

A friend of mine, who has seven grandchildren, told me that "other people's grandchildren are boring".

I disagree. I am very pleased to hear about the achievements of my friends' grandchildren, no matter how many they have.

Our grandchildren are our future and why should we not celebrate their achievements?

maddyone

No need to apologise Calli, we used to smile at her boasting pride at the sheer number of grandchildren and great grandchildren she had.

With no effort at all on her part! 😁

Norah

GabriellaG54

The bare truth is, that I am no more really interested in what friends or other people's GC have achieved than they are in mine, therefore I delicately brush off polite enquiries so that I don't have to reciprocate.
I bet people wouldn't be so forthcoming about their failures...eh?

I believe modesty is a good trait.

I thought for a minute GabriellaG was back to keep us entertained!

Then realised this is an old, resurrected, thread.

I liked her.
She helped me fix my toilet seat!

I suppose that if someone has 103 great-grandchildren is unlikely to drone on about their every move - she'll be lucky to remember all their names .

Seriously - it's natural to talk about family, and of course people are proud of their families. I think that an occasional mention is perfectly fine, and if that's about someone winning a prize or achieving something, so what? It's only when people try to outdo others that it's unpleasant, and when grandchildren are someone's only topic of conversation that it gets boring.

Doodledog

I suppose that if someone has 103 great-grandchildren is unlikely to drone on about their every move - she'll be lucky to remember all their names .

Seriously - it's natural to talk about family, and of course people are proud of their families. I think that an occasional mention is perfectly fine, and if that's about someone winning a prize or achieving something, so what? It's only when people try to outdo others that it's unpleasant, and when grandchildren are someone's only topic of conversation that it gets boring.

I doubt many people "brag" on numbers of children or grandchildren/great grandchildren -- we view family size as a fun lack of self control or good timing. But we're Catholic. Blame the Pope(s).

I think it's fine to speak minimally about GC - if people ask.

A swift mention is fine. Banging on is not.

Very few people are that interested in our children/grandchildren.

No reason they would be.

It’s like the holiday photos of yesteryear - people try to look interested for a while.😗

Agree DiamondLily! Bit like pretending to be interested when someone wants to tell you about the dream they had last night.
🤣

I don’t get why bragging about your children is wrong but bragging about your GC is ok . It’s natural to be proud of both your DC and DGC .
I’m fine with bragging as long as it’s short and sweet . Mention the occasion or achievement , maybe show a photo and move on . Banging on about it is very boring , which many grans don’t realise .
Also before bragging about your GC read the room!!! And have some empathy for those not in your position.

Urmstongran - it depends on who it is - and how exciting their dreams are though...

Also before bragging about your GC read the room!!! And have some empathy for those not in your position We're fortunate that this is what family and friends do Tenko, as we've never known our GC due to estrangement.

Of course they do mention their GC but having done so, the conversations move on relatively quickly. They rarely show photo's and when they do, always ask us if we would like to see them which we always do.

They're proud of their families as they should be, and their sensitivity to our situation is always appreciated.

People ask me how many gc I have. I find it a bit embarassing. I move on the conversation unless they ask more questions about it. Then I will tell them.

Urmstongran

Agree DiamondLily! Bit like pretending to be interested when someone wants to tell you about the dream they had last night.
🤣

Or men people telling you which roads they used in their four hour drive to get to where they are going

Yes, you don’t hear so much about the failures, do you?

“Billy was the last one in his class to get a reading book”.

“Mary didn’t get any of her GCSE’s”.

“Tom passed his driving test on the fifth time”.