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Grandparenting

Feeling tugged in all directions

(154 Posts)
quizqueen Wed 14-Aug-19 16:55:20

Can you take him with you too or arrange for someone to stay in your home with him for a few days? You will want to see your new grandchildren as often as possible, I expect, so you need to make future plans for his care for whenever you are away.

eazybee Wed 14-Aug-19 16:54:29

Can you employ a temporary carer, or is it possible to take him with you? If not, I think on this occasion you should put your daughter's needs first as it is only for a limited, irreplaceable, time, and your husband should appreciate this and agree to brief respite care.

Smileless2012 Wed 14-Aug-19 16:52:08

Oh dear, what a difficult situation to be in jellybeanjean.

You say your suggestion didn't go down very well, so does that mean he didn't flatly refuse? If so, could you have another talk with him?

Two weeks probably seems like a long time to your DH, could you compromise and just leave him for a week? Not ideal I know but better than nothing perhaps.

I do hope you can get something sorted out. Good luck.

jellybeanjean Wed 14-Aug-19 16:45:23

My daughter has just given birth to twins after a very stressful pregnancy (IVF). All is now well although the first few days were tricky. I'm paying a flying visit tomorrow (she's in London, I'm near Bournemouth) which will be wonderful.
She has asked for help after her husband goes back to work in a couple of weeks. I would love to be there for her, but my problem is my husband is physically disabled and I'm his carer. He can just about manage if I'm away overnight (I leave him his breakfast, meals, a flask of coffee, instructions for microwave etc) but he is simply not safe physically to be on his own for more than that. He's 81. I'm desperate to be with my daughter and help with her lovely babies but how can I leave him? I have suggested he goes into a care home for two weeks but that didn't go down very well! I just don't know what to do.