Sadly it does seem kids who are allowed to run riot as they please do end up badly off in later life, one of my elder children took under her wing the child of her partner (result of a one-night stand he had before my daughter even knew him)at about 3,he used to come weekends etc,my daughter treated him like her own child,then when they had their own kids together,treated them all same,then after awhile childs 'real' mum didn't send him for a bit,let him run wild on estate where they lived,doing as he pleased,staying out with older kids,(age about 8/9)! He got in trouble,went to live full time with my daughter&his dad,was settling down living a real family life,we as a whole family,treated him same as all other kids in our family,he WAS part of all our family,then he started visiting his mum.'bad' behaviour started again.he went back to live with his mum full time,lost contact with his dad(through no fault of his dads) now he's in a young offenders institution.its such a shame for that poor young boy,as when he was around our family he was such a good kid!His own mother has a lot to answer for!(I've brought up 7 kids,mostly on my own,and they all have good manners,and either respectable jobs or are in study at college/uni.) I now have GC in differing ages,(older to younger) and all of them know how to behave.Its how you're brought up that makes the difference.