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Looking for a Nanny to love my 3 beautiful amazing children

(30 Posts)
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sodapop Sun 17-Nov-19 12:42:11

Totally agree with BlueBelle you are over dramatising things which is not helping your children. Advertising in this way is leaving you open to very plausible people who may harm your family.
Enjoy your time together with your children and husband and forget about 'if only'

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theretheredear Sun 17-Nov-19 09:31:45

I hope you find someone to be a surrogate smile
Wishing you all the best ?

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BlueBelle Sun 17-Nov-19 07:38:09

Very questionable thing to do in my opinion It’s one thing to encourage a well known and trusted friend or neighbour workmate etc to be involved in your children’s life but to advertise for surrogate grandparents is so scary
Two of my grandkids only have me and their mum in their lives Dad .died, his parents long gone before they were born, , and my ex also dead who was not interested in them before he died, they have grown up perfectly ok ....it’s life
Your children have you and their Dad you can’t force the other grandparents to be involved and you can’t always make everything right
Stop dwelling on what they haven’t got with them give one explanation about the absent grandparents then move on to other things you are causing more problems by making it HUGE, its not, having a mum and dad and a comfortable life is

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BradfordLass72 Sun 17-Nov-19 04:23:05

Your children are better off without these nasty people.

My graandson's other grandparents said things very similar to him when he was younger.

Like your children, he wondered what he had done wrong if they didn't love him.

I was planning to make scrambled eggs for us and he said he disliked scrambled eggs smile so I was able to explain that it was not actually the fault of the scrambled eggs that he didn't like them - that's just the way it was.

Scrambled eggs were, to most people, absolutely delicious.
Likewise, it was not his fault if his gps didn't like him, he was a great person and good company but they couldn't see that.

Your children should be reassured that they (like the eggs) did nothing wrong at all.

The grandparents in our life, were eventually cut off from contact because they did so much damage - my grandson used to come home from visits with them absolutely distraught at what they had said to him.
Now he doesn't see them and doesn't even have to face the prospect of it, he is much calmer.

We have explained to him that some people, unfortunately, have brains which don't really work properly and so they say and do horrible things.

It's a kind way of explaining to a young child but later on, when he is older and stronger, he'll learn the truth.

I would, if I were you, be very careful indeed about letting anyone come close to your children unless YOU have first got to know them thoroughly (not just one or two visits) and even then, never, ever leave them alone with an adult, unless you are within earshot.
They have suffered enough.

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MissingaNan Sat 16-Nov-19 23:17:14

Hi all,

Don’t know really where to start but here goes ...

I lost my amazing Mum 3 Years ago she really was an amazing person, one of a kind & really as she was as perfect as you can get.

I have three beautiful amazing kids who she adored & they adored her. We all terribly miss her. My eldest 2 are having counselling to help with their heart healing.

On to my Husband’s parents. Well they washed their hands with us, when we had just one child who was only 5 Months old & I was pregnant with my second.

My Husband left the army on medical grounds as he’s mental health was badly effected. His parents said he was a failure & a let down to them. Being as their from a military background, to leave the army in their family for any reason was a big no no.

I helped my Husband heal & he is an amazing hard working Dad.

When we lost my Mum my eldest two kept asking why all their friends had 2 Nanny’s & 2 Grandad’s. We explained that we had lost contact with their other Grandparents & would try our best to contact them. I sent them a really nice E-mail, much to my disgust after the way they previously treated my Husband, baby & unborn baby by just washing their hands with us. But I suppose wanting to give them a second chance & believe people can change. I put my own feelings a side & decided for my kids, I would try to give them back what they was missing, regardless of the pain it would cause me. After sending my E-mail asking how they were. Explaining we now have 3 amazing kids, 2 of which they had never met & asking if they would be happy to put the past in the past & get to know them, as the kids were desperate to meet them. They refused this, continuing with their evil ways. A while passed still with my kids asking about them. I decided yet again to try. This time it was successful. I hated every moment of meeting up with them every Weekend. Them making my children happy & laugh. When they’d be so evil in the past & my amazing Mum couldn’t do this. But seeing my children happy was the most important thing. So a Year passed with them being ok. My kids gained a bond. Things started to go wrong. They told us they was moving away in 3 Years. They told my eldest sensitive boy who’s only 7. If one of them was the die the other would kill theirselves. This was just a few of the terrible things they done. They don’t speak to their own Daughter who herself has 5 children, all who have nothing to do with them. Well the Sister decided to try rebuild with them too. This caused a problem some how for us as again the Mum turned really evil. She requested a break from us, which we gave her 2 Weeks infact. After the 2 Weeks of no contact. My children were asking questions, I just didn’t have the answers too. I decided to text her to see how she was & to see where we was going from here. No response. I had to break the news to my kids, we wouldn’t be seeing them again. I spend so much time & effort on my kids making them see how amazing they are. To have two people come into their life’s & destroy all the hard work I do. My Daughter who’s only 6 is heartbroken. My eldest boy who’s 7 hasn’t really said much & my 4 Year old Son doesn’t really understand. My Daughter asks me every-day since if we’re so amazing Mummy, why doesn’t our Nanny & Grandad love us enough to want to see us any-more. It breaks my heart. As if loosing their amazing Nan wasn’t enough, but now I have let two monsters into their life’s to cause nothing but pain.

So thanks for reading this long story, just really needed the rant & to make you understand how important this post is.

My Daughter is pleading with me to adopt her a Nan. All she wants is the love & cuddles. Not after any-one’s money, no gifts ever needed. Just some-ones time & love.

We’re from Kent, England. Would love to find some-one who can give my family the missing Nan & Grandad. There must be some-one out there missing the grandkids too.

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