Feeling quite bruised and upset, so feel I have to let off steam! I saw on Facebook that my niece/ godchild (age 49) and husband are moving. He’s starting a year long course, they don’t have much money and through Facebook are letting friends and everyone know that they would like help. Crowdfunding has been suggested. However I thought this would be an opportunity for me to help them. We’re not very close, but we see each other at family occasions. So I said I’d like to help and could they send bank transfer details - that was 2 days ago. I sent a sizeable contribution, about one fifth of what they needed. I told them when I was sending it, but I didn’t say the amount, I wanted it to be a nice surprise. That was on Tuesday evening, and I received an email first thing next morning (yesterday) saying the money wasn’t in their account. I explained that it might take 24 hours, but that I was checking too, and would sort it out out if it didn’t arrive. Last night I got a very brief, unfriendly terse email from her saying that the money still hadn’t arrived with ‘hadn’t’ written in capitals - HADN’T - which always makes me feel I’m being shouted at! By this time she’d dropped any pleasantries from the conversation. I didn’t reply as I felt I’d already said what I would do. This morning I checked my bank account, and the money had been transferred to the correct account. I sent a message confirming money had gone from my account and could they confirm they’d received it. I received an email from her 7 minutes later (and to give her the benefit of the doubt - our emails might have crossed while sending) saying crossly again ‘ that x amount of money had arrived in their account. Please confirm’. Since then I have heard nothing. I feel mortally wounded, I wouldn’t mind if she’d just apologised for being a bit hasty, that they were worried etc. But it’s like she’s calling the shots ……. as the saying goes ‘the best intentions gang aft agley’ . It’s put me off helping them again.
