Sign up to Gransnet Daily
Our free daily newsletter full of hot threads, competitions and discounts
Subscribe
butterandjam
In your shoes I would take my smelling salts, lie down in a darkened room with a large gin, and be unavailable for child sitting for at least 48 hours.
What a good idea. I would do that but don’t want to miss theatre trip tomorrow. Might get tips from the perfect Nanny - Mary Poppins! Ha ha.
You did nothing wrong with your GC at all. I think al you got wrong is that its a fairly "dark" retelling tho has funny bits and you cannot know what children will find scary or at what age. DD is being. very unreasonable, it's just one of those things.
Going forward, best bet is to ask DD for list of approved films. She was being entirely unreasonable how she reacted.
However it was a mistake to take it to MiL.
Best advice I can think of: "lie low". Go "ah" and hmmm. hmm unless something specific is asked of you and if it is, play it down "oh, well I was rather tired when I said that".
With DD, keep your dignity.
You may be scared she'll withdraw the children, but she needs you.
Just keep matters as "ordinary/everyday as you can till things die down.
They will.
I think its the hot weather and the school holidays, pressure of work (both of you) and the world is not a happy place at the moment. There has been something similar here. Just let it come out in the wash. Your daughter needs you and the grandchildren need to see you. Its holiday time- what's a bit of popcorn at bedtime - it doesn't cause nightmares.
In your shoes I would take my smelling salts, lie down in a darkened room with a large gin, and be unavailable for child sitting for at least 48 hours.
Oh no 🤔 I thought worms were a thing of the past. That has really scared me.😳
Hope the issue with your daughter has been sorted.
Sorry that I mentioned the worms - but somehow, that’s what stuck out to me because 70 years ago, I’m sure I had worms 😂
Dear me, what a storm in a teacup, blaming your GDs nightmare on you and as for saying if you can’t look after the children they will make other arrangements that is just nasty, and I am supposing they would have to pay royally for alternative childcare rather than having readily available grandparents for free, paying to take the children to the theatre etc.
I think you need to have a serious conversation with your daughter about how blessed she is to have such helpful parents and in- laws who can help with the kids.
The cheek of it.
Maybe not the best idea to quote her MIL! Hopefully that will blow over. I’m sorry your DD is being critical though as you obviously give your GC a lovely time. Your daughter did mention possibly seeking alternative arrangements. She won’t of course but you could call her bluff and see what she has in mind. You are doing a sterling job and I hope things get back on an even keel soon. Enjoy the theatre (I take it that’s still going ahead?)
I am just really sounding off as have nobody to moan at here.
My 2 grandchildren aged 5 and 1 are being looked after during school holidays by me and other Grandma, 2 days a week for 1 year old ( I have him 1 day a week) and 3 days for 5 year old (I have her 2 days a week).
I try to organise things to fill the days especially with the 5 year old, theatre trips, softplay, parks and National Trust houses who are organising children’s events.
Last week daughter was working in London so she asked to help Husband out could I have granddaughter overnight.
So last week after a long day at a NT property we got back and as I was Cooking dinner GD asked to watch a kids programme on Netflixs I said yes for 20 minutes. I checked and thought it was suitable a funny retelling of Snow White with bears instead of dwarfs.
Later that night she fell out of bed, not hurt but a bit upset. When she later told her Mum she said it was because she was upset about the bears who had itchy bums and were rubbing them on trees and had a nightmare, GD said it reminded her of when she had worms which was an upsetting time for her.
Well I feel it’s blown up out of proportion, and I feel daughter being totally unreasonable, she has banned me from letting her watch Netflix’s ( I can’t be trusted to let her watch suitable programmes - okay fine) Also why did I let her watch 20 minutes Netflixs when later that evening we had a movie night. Total of 2 hours screen time too much. I also let her have popcorn just before bed!
She told me if I couldn’t look after them both properly she would make alternative child care arrangements.
I have created further trouble by telling her that her MIL said to me that she thinks my daughter bullys me and I am frightened of her. I defended her but she is angry and upset with MIL She asked me if I am frightened of her and I said I am often anxious and feel I am treading on egg shells.
Daughter says she has been so upset about it this weekend and I had a long conversation with her and her telling me on how hard it is to be a parent and working Mum!! Err this was me 30 odd years ago with very little grandparents support or money for extra childcare or holiday activities.
Now her MIL has been to see me calling me a liar saying she never said these things.
I am sure it will all blow over, we have a Theatre trip booked tomorrow and can’t believe my Daughter will say my GD can’t go with me.
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join the discussion, watch threads and lots more.
Register now »Already registered? Log in with:
Gransnet »Get our top conversations, latest advice, fantastic competitions, and more, straight to your inbox. Sign up to our daily newsletter here.
