Feeling guilty when having been strict

I'm a better Grandmother than I was a Mother, sadly for my son & daughter.

Thank you for the reassuring posts, they really help. Mostly, my sessions are staggered, Sarnia, but these days I had them all three for full days. BTW, there is also a newborn, so for the future, I will have to set my boundaries, I guess… I want to be a grandma, not a daycare professional!
And Silverlining, I understand completely, how this could happen and also how it is still in your mind. But as other posters wrote, we are only human. Thanks for sharing !

You can apologise. It is a life lesson for them that adults get it wrong sometimes.

Thanks Oma, You must set your boundaries at the outset. You will get older and if you agree to too much at the start it’s almost impossible to cut back.

Missiseff

I'm a better Grandmother than I was a Mother, sadly for my son & daughter.

Same here.

Personally I'm full of admiration for you being able to look after three young children especially the terrible twos and threes! Not easy in the least! I think most of us would be exhausted. Your family are very lucky to have you doing this. I have shouted and lost my temper before with grandchildren under particularly difficult circumstances and very bad behaviour and like you have felt extremely guilty and quite unwell about it for days afterwards. I suppose we have to remember none of us are spring chickens anymore, sometimes have health complaints and genuinely do not have the energy so probably instead of feeling guilty we should be patting ourself on the back for the good we are doing instead of feeling guilty about what we feel we have done wrong! Hard to change our nature though!

My grandchildren live with me and get disciplined when needed the same as my boys did. They love me dearly. Children need boundaries.

Don’t feel guilty about disciplining the grandkids now and again. I do feel bad when I’m home and think I was maybe a bit harsh but they do listen to me. I think the modern parenting style is not teaching the kids anything . That is the more they protest the more the parents give in.Which unfortunately leads to a lack of respect for the parents.I notice this with my Sil who is,in my opinion way too soft.