How far is too far?

We live near each other, a walk or a few mins in a car.You have to think about the price of petrol as well as your time spent on the journeys to and fro.
10-20 mins would be perfect.

Mine live 5 minutes and 15 minutes away (driving distance). They chose to move this distance from us. I don't think I'd like to live more than an hour away, but it hasn't come up. I moved nearly 2 hours from my parents when my DDs were 7&10 but still saw them once a week at first, twice a month after a while but it only took an hour and a half after a couple of years when a couple of new bypasses were built.

One of mine lives in Europe the other a three minute walk away you just have to take what you can get and roll with it and be grateful for video calls

My eldest DC is 12 miles away, next 12,000 miles (NZ) third about 400 miles, 4th maybe 40 miles.
Luckily we chat on WhatsApp and I don't feel deprived.
I am aware that plenty of people in my town have DC and DGC who have never moved away.
This has never been my experience. I left home at 19 and my DC left even younger to follow their dreams. I wouldn't want it any other way.

The DGC are doing the same and choosing universities in far away cities.

I did live around 30 mins away from my daughter and grandchildren. She needed a lot of support. I moved around 10 mins by car away.
She needs a bit less support now but it's been a positive move for me.

The thing is, we brought the DC up to have an international outlook and ha ha they both married foreigners, one Australian and one German. However, lucky us, they all live on the same land mass, if not nearby. I know lots of grandparents with children and grandchildren in far-away continents; it's hard for them
I was 45 minutes by car away from my DM, which was perfect: easy to visit in an afternoon, but not too close to just drop in. But my siblings were much further away from her.

I live 200 miles from my grandchildren but they will be moving nearer this summer. Once they are settled I hope to move neaarer to them but I don't want to cramp their style by being too close. I need to find a place where I can be happy and build new friendships etc. There is no guarantee they won't move again in the future so although I hope to be within 10 to 20 miles that could change later. I know many people whose AC and GC all live nearby and who are very involved in childcare etc and I cetainly hope to be able to help out in emergencies but not up fo regular childcare at my age. Hopefully I'll find somewhere that fits the bill and then hope they stay reasonably nearby.

Grammaretto 4 of my children also moved away for university - and one for work.

They do sometimes come "back" though it seems. I now have the four who are in the UK all less than an hour away.

I feel lucky to have them close enough to be a part of their lives - but we are now looking to move to somewhere just for us so we may not end up quite so local.

I think i must be the only one here on GN that does not think about distance from AC or GC. In my little mind, beginning at 20 yrs old, I understood that the Lord gave me children to bring up because they could not survive on their own - like a lending - and now they are adults there is nothing necessary I need to do to help them continue. Just a lending. They are God's children, not mine. I have never felt any different.

All you grans and grampas, how far were you from grandparents when growing up? I was away over 3,000 miles.

Macaydia

All you grans and grampas, how far were you from grandparents when growing up? I was away over 3,000 miles.

Well, my father was in the army, so distance from both sets of grandparents, who only lived a few roads apart varied from a hundred yards or so to 6,000 miles, depending on where he was posted.

At ones stage, between the ages of 8-11, I did not see my grandparents for three years. Even that gap could not erode, my abiding love for my maternal grandmother.

My son and dil live 10 mins away but hardly see them. It’s not the distance but the purpose I say. Feeling as if myself and hubby are fading away in family life. But they are all busy I know and it’s their lives they need to lead.

Macaydia

All you grans and grampas, how far were you from grandparents when growing up? I was away over 3,000 miles.

When we had children and my parents became grandparents they were almost exactly 100 miles away. We moved after a while to about 200 miles away, then nearly 4,000 and eventually, when they died we were about 170 miles away.
Always felt close - even in pre-internet days.

I only ever had one grandparent. The others were already dead when I was born. My grandmother was just 2 miles away.

My husband's parents were always about 50 to 100 miles further away from us than my parents. This was coincidental.
My husband's own grandparents never lived close to him either...

Maybe those of us whose families had moved some distance from where they were born - rather than always being in one local area - don't find it so hard to be a bit further away from our own grandchildren? We have experiences that still speak to the love we have for each other.

Such an interesting idea.

Macaydia

All you grans and grampas, how far were you from grandparents when growing up? I was away over 3,000 miles.

My paternal grandparents died before I was born. They had lived over 120 miles away.

My maternal grandparents lived in the same town, a bus ride and a walk away but both had died by the time I was six.

However, my parents had lived overseas with my siblings before I was born, so about 2,000 miles away.

My grandfather and grandmother lived in India and I never saw them at all.

I was always a bit jealous of friends who had grandparents because i never experienced it. Seemed like a reeally nice thing though.

My youngest daughter moved two years ago to Barbados for her husbands work.They have two small children,Prior to this they lived a three minute drive away so we were very sad to see them go.
However, we now get to go there a couple of times a year and they all come back home for two months in the summer and stay in an air bnb also minutes away from us.This makes the times we see them extra special and the kids love coming back to granny’s house again. Barbados isn’t forever and eventually they plan to return to their home here in Canada,hopefully close by once again,

Macaydia

I was always a bit jealous of friends who had grandparents because i never experienced it. Seemed like a reeally nice thing though.

I don't remember mine, Macaydia, although I have a vague recollection of my Grandad sitting in his leather armchair.
Even the house has gone now!

Macaydia

All you grans and grampas, how far were you from grandparents when growing up? I was away over 3,000 miles.

Mine were just round the corner😃I loved them dearly and still miss them.

Macaydia

All you grans and grampas, how far were you from grandparents when growing up? I was away over 3,000 miles.

Grandparents were next door, other grandparents in London.

Thank you everyone for your replies.

G’ma Manchester was 300 miles away, and we visited once or twice a year.
Other GP’s were much more local and we usually went to their house for Sunday lunch. They lived on my uncles farm so it was an extended family gathering.
Once when I had a leg injury that meant I couldn’t go to school I stayed with them for weeks.

It was rather different for my children though. We lived in and around London. Both Grandads had died before the children were born, both Grandmas were over 100 miles away in different directions. We visited as often as we could, at least each school holiday. Neither G’ma did any hands on childcare - didn’t cross any of our minds as an option.

I live a 10 min. walk from one daughter and her family. When my G.children were younger I could easily childmind and do the school run etc. which I loved. I see them less often now because they are busy people. We have the occasional meal together, celebrate birthdays and I go to see their field sports. Today one GC is popping round after school for a sewing lesson. I was fortunate to have their help when I broke my ankle and recently my daughter drove me to and fro hospital for cataract surgery. When they are away I pop in and water the plants etc and they do the same for me. I love knowing they'are closeby.

40 minutes is not far at all.