Soop's pleasant (if boring) kitchen for friendly folk and precious pets.

Sun was shining when I finished volunteering charley, so it was off to the beach for a very windy walk followed by a coffee. Equilibrium restored. . Do agree, we seem to miss out on sunshine, feels like a personal insult at times . Could do with stowing away on your cruise galen, do you need anyone to care for your pearls? Could do a quick NVQ

Don't begrudge Rory the sunshine, soop. You must enjoy seeing him relax.

kitty I volunteer in a Child Contact Centre. We open twice a month with a morning and afternoon session. Heartbreaking and rewarding in equal parts.

Love the pass the £10 game, callgirl, just the sort of thing I would do. Hope you win, otherwise perhaps agree to giving one to each other .

I'm sure you sorted the cup n&g The faith in you is quite a responsibility. So sorry about your friend, bound to be a worry, wishing her a full recovery.

Well, I'm determined to sleep well tonight, currently have feet up with my weekend glass of chilled white. Gardening planned tomorrow which I love so a day to look forward to. Take care everyone.

Should have said but had forgotten , I had to insist on a shower and complete change of clothes this morning, he reminded me of somebody sleeping rough.
How awful is that to realise and admit to others?
I can't quite believe things would ever come to this.

It is awful living with Alzheimer's Ann , there is no respite and when you do get out , or five minutes on your own it hits you like a brick wall when you return .Today OH has sat in silence as longs as I am in the room , when I go in the Kitchen, two steps away , he starts a conversation , I have to come back to hear what he is saying , then he tells me it isn't me he wants to talk to . But the other day he shouted for me to come quick to see the style on the TV at the Dublin horse Show , and he could name a lot of the people on the TV !! I must say he was always very clean , as long as I moved the underwear and left out clean , some days he showered twice , now he complains to the carers if they don't shower him every day , they are only allowed twice a week lol

I'm away with intermittent wifi - I haven't seen the thread that caused annsixty to be distressed and may loose wifi as I negotiate my way round. So - love to you annsixty. I haven't lived with alzhiemers as you do but I have a little experience of just how tough it is for the partner and other loved ones of the person with the illness. Gransnet can be such a supportive place but when it 'turns' it is so much worse than it ought to be.
We had a tyre blow during our trip today - very scary indeed. However, no one hurt and the AA were, as always, helpful, efficient and kind. Phew.

Bought a new evening dress. Ad says gold, looks more silver to me. Still got to try to find the energy to try it on. I know it will be too long although they say the model wearing it is my height. Why do they make all evening dresses for 6' women wearing 6" heels? I'm 5' 7" and can only wear flats!??????

Oh annsixty and aggie my heart goes out to you.
I thought that "personal care" would be a complete no-no for me (and for paw loss of dignity etc) but actually, faced with it, it doesn't bother me as it is not my Paw but Paw the patient . As he gets better and regains some independence and "dignity" things may change, but at the moment I can just get on withnit. What really distresses me though is when he becomes confused, disorientated, can't understand simple instruction and does the opposite, gets his words wrong or talks nonsense as happened on Thursday. I knew it wasn't dementia because it was too sudden but it could have been a TIA or a UTI and whatever it was (acute dehydration, it seems) I realised that physical problems are one thing because they are visible, but mental issues such as dementia are a hundred times worse. So you have my every sympathy and I take my hat off to you for coping.

Totally agree with mawb, you have my admiration, as does maw. X

Maw it was the suddenness of Paws confusion that threw you , believe me you will cope . I sympathise with "the patient" as opposed to the "Partner" , suddenly personal care becomes normal ..... whatever that is , hydration is so important , and I have to watch it too , then days when he won't eat , just reduce helpings and offer often , then suddenly they are starving and don't believe they have eaten ... as DD says .. laugh or you will be crying

As corner says I cannot offer anything but admiration for those of you coping with life partners with serious illness or dementia. I feel totally impotent at the thought of what you are going through. If I ever have to go through it myself I hope I have your strength and courage. All my problems seem minuscule by comparison.
Our new bathroom is turning into a bit of a saga. I should have learned by now that anything we do in this house is never going to be straightforward. It is a lovely house, but whoever designed the Heath Robinson plumbing obviously meant it to be an ongoing problem of nightmare proportions for whoever lived here. Our intention was to have a floor level walk in shower tray, but we cannot have that now because the hole for the waste sits directly over the pipe that takes the toilet waste away from both this bathroom and the ensuite in our bedroom. There was no way to know this until the bath came out. There is also a joist in the way. As we have designed the rest of the bathroom around the shower area, we now have no alternative but to raise the height of the tray to accommodate the waste. Added to this, I took the plumber up a cup of tea yesterday to find him chopping a large hole in the wall. I asked him what it was for. "The shower valve", he said. I told him it wasn't going there - we had discussed that it was to go on the wall where you walk into the shower. He had forgotten. Fortunately he had not got to the stage of putting in the pipes, or that would have been another fait accompli. Watch this space for the next exciting episode. DD and her menfolk came home from their holidays on Friday and we were looking forward to seeing them today but they are going down to London for the last day of the athletics, and then to the Tower on Monday. I didn't realise this until last night or we could have gone over to see them, so I feel a bit cheated. She did tell me they were going, but like my plumber, I forget things! So it will now be Tuesday before I get to give my grandson a hug. We are going for a walk on the moors to see the heather today, so that may cheer me up!

Sorry it's a long post!

Sympathise with the bathroom blues greyduster. Really pleased you could divert the plumber from his intentions before it was too late. Sadly our 'miscommunication' was too far advanced when spotted to change sensibly so our bathroom isn't quite as we intended. Everyone says how lovely it is but I know it's not our design and it aggravates still as it doesn't feel 'ours'. There are bigger things in the world to worry about of course, it still matters though. I suspect without the bathroom you wouldn't be fretting so much about missing your family yesterday. Hope your walk restores equilibrium as mine did. Gardening for me today, that's always calming too, well unless Mr C decides on some unsupervised weeding when there will be few plants left

That's how I feel, corner. You have a vision of what you really want it to be and having to compromise is a huge disappointment, but as DH says (he is seldom phased by anything) there are people in the world with no running water let alone a bathroom. I'm sure that will be a consolation in time. Enjoy your day ?.

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Good morning all !

I love the round robin £10 story callgirl . That's the sort of thing that happens here.

My heart goes out to you ann your daily life is so wearing , I really don't know how you do it but suspect you will say you just have to get on with it . You're a star !

The cup was a challenge but managed it in the end , I will pop over to see Herbert and Sherbet next week to deliver it before they head off on their hols .

How awful that your OH can only be showered twice a week aggie what is the world coming to? Its those little human dignities that can make the difference. Poor soul ! I don't know how those of you with DH with this illness keep on keeping on.

Glad your blown tyre didn't cause a real problem. We had it happen once Iam and its scary.

How is Paw today Maw? And how are you?

ahhh Grey the bathroom will be the end of you yet I think . I sympathise totally with the shower issue, we had a similar one here when we fitted our shower room and I have ended up with a shower tray a good 6 inches higher than wanted and it is only now some years later with tricky mobility that its causing me problems. So I feel your pain. Take more tea to the plumber, to ensure no further miscommunications !!

The little boys with Mummy and Daddy went to Leeds castle for the day yesterday. When I spoke to them later I asked after all the exciting things they did there and apparently the most exciting thing was they got a hot doughnut !!

Easily pleased it seems [laugh]

Happy day all !

N&G Leeds Castle is somewhere I have always wanted to visit - I just wish it was a bit nearer to Leeds!! And the boys never even saved me a bit of donut (they have their priorities right) - I'm peeved! Gorgeous photos. Glad you managed to get Stevie's cup - his faith in you, as usual, was not misplaced. You're a star!

N&G did Jackson and Cooper's mum and dad have to spend quite so much money on petrol and possibly entrance fees to pay for a hot doughnut?! I love to see their smiling faces, luckily I am not around to witness grouch and grump at their best!

Herbert and Sherbert will be delighted to see you today- lovely to have a holiday to which to look forward.

I let moaning Minnie out very early today and retired to bed for a lie in until nearly 9am- unheard of in this hotel. The sun is shining so the washing will be out soon.

aggie a shower x2 a week- it is that sort of "care" that I dread. After I had surgery on my broken ankle in 2009, I was in for around 12 days and was desperate to get my hair washed and had to rely on a friend getting me to the bathroom and washing it for me. Heaven help patients who have no idea of their surroundings, I would not think that would ever be done.

Maw I hope that all three of you had a better night and that Paw is slowly becoming aware of his surroundings. I did not realise that he had been in hospital for 5 weeks. Please try to relax sitting down with a cup of coffee-even if you do fall asleep, you do need the rest and you must look after yourself.

As corner appears to be a great gardener, I think that I may employ her to fill tubs and baskets etc. My mother was a great gardener but that gene escaped me totally. I know what I like but how to achieve it is something else.

A certain upmarket supermarket close to me is selling 3 for the price of two perennials in largish tubs but each looks almost moribund to me.

soop it sounds as though the analgesia is working on Rory if he can enjoy the simple pleasures of sunbathing.

Enjoy the sunshine if it has reached your part of the country.

Oh charlie, misplaced faith in my gardening ability. . The system goes like this, when planted there is a polite request that the new arrival thrives. If it should be seen to fail to thrive it is presented with a yellow card. Should that not work there is a red card and it's off to the gardening recycling bag. The entire cycle is completed in 18 months or less. I have insufficient patience to be a proper gardener . Although I did rescue six bedraggled geraniums from a supermarket reduced shelf. Reduced to 9 pence, now blooming beautifully. Oh well, back to issuing cards .

Hello all. There's been a lot of changes since I last dropped in. Mostly I've been busy. I've taken over my DiL washing and ironing and childminding after finding her in tears. The first time I've seen her distraught since her diagnosis. (I really hope my memory of her so distraught fades) As always when I'm actually with her I'm fine and sort of take control as in "now let's see how best I can help" then formulate a plan and implement it. Great you'd think but a week after I felt as if my emotions have been frozen and have remained that way. I don't feel depressed, at least not in that terrible dark way. Just nothing really. I do what needs doing and still enjoy the little pleasures. What I can't seem to face is making telephone call, sorting mundane problems, contacting freinds, visiting gransnet (I don't get why I've always enjoyed and had fantastic support here) perhaps it's some low type of depression. My G.P is lovely and knows what's going on and has offered medication but it's not what I want. I need to be focused and I feel it'll slow me down anyway my feeling is some crises no matter how harrowing have to be borne. As a footnote to those of you who have shown great kindness my DiL is coping reasonably well with the treatment (apart from that one breakdown) the children have hardly noticed. My son had a wobble at the start but he's settled a little now. We may have some indication of how she's responding to the chemotherapy by the end of the month. So fingers crossed, prayers please and positive thoughts welcome

How could we not respond with our prayers and positive thoughts more than they are winging their way to all your family, along with very best wishes for more hopeful news.

Sorry I don't have any words to help but you are all included in my prayers morethan, annsixy and maw and paw. You all have so much to cope with.

Likewise, sympathy and thoughts to morethan, ann and maw. You all have such a lot to bear at the moment, it does put my minor irritations into perspective.

I have just returned from a lovely walk in the sunshine with Queenie (greyhound) along the river bank, thinking how lucky I am to live here on this beautiful morning and with no real problems to worry me. I feel for you ann, morethan, maw, paw and all those who have a tough life right now ?

A&E again, found paw on the carpet first thing as if he had tried to go to the loo but taken wrong turn.
Didn't hear him fall so assume he sort of slithered to the floor and fell asleep there. Ambulance.
Unresponsive to voices but vitals all stable .
Worried

maw so very sorry to hear this news - good though that he has gone to hospital where he can have constant monitoring

Oh no Maw! Just when we were all hoping things were improving for you. Hope they get Paw sorted out and back home asap . Keep strong but be kind to yourself too.

Thinking of you and sending positive vibes to MK hospital - I know it well!

So sorry Maw just when that corner was in sight.
Keep us in touch we will be anxious for you.x