anxiety/emotions

Your self-analysis is spot on. Yes, shutting people's emotions down by belittling is a way of controlling.

Your feelings are, to them, an inconvenient truth which they aren't strong enough to handle.
But you are.

I read a core of strength and wisdom in your post which I'm sure will stand you in good stead.

There is anxiety and there is 'situational anxiety' (caused by the situation) and depression and 'situational depression'.

At the moment I suspect you may have situational anxiety as a result of what's just happened.

You can tell people, firmly and kindly that YOU have a right to feel as you do and they have no right to tell you your feelings are invalid.
It doesn't have to be an argument, just a statement - even a written one if that feels better.

Don't enter into discussion, it's not up for discussion. Your feelings are valid and real - end of story.

The question is are you anxious about things and they are telling you there is no need to worry or that there is nothing you can do about it so don’t worry about it. Or, are you saying that they think your opinions are worthless. These are two different things.
Sorry I am not clear from your post which this is.

I have read your post twice to make sure I understand you. I think I do!?

I am wondering if you suffer with anxiety and are a bit more sensitive than he average person. The reason I as this is because people all 'feel' different about things. Jus like people like different taste in food. What one likes another hates. What upsets or makes you anxious does not bother the people around you. Hence they do not understand. They can not identify with what you are feeling because they themselves do not feel like that. I have found the people I can tell my anxieties to and who will listen and sympathize and who not to tell them to. The people who I don't tell are because I know they will not understand and indeed make me feel even worse. Try to believe, which I think is the case, not that they do not care but are not capable of feeling about certain things like you are. You also have to accept that some people are just horrible and when you find that out just avoid them at all costs!! But knw there are many people like yourself who are a bit more sensitive than the average person. Try to think of it as being a good thing. What a world it would be if everybody was as hard as nails!!