Do I live in the most boring town in Britain?

Allira you are so right setting up a group is not for the faint hearted at all, not sure I d be so confident at that now rejection would be horrid
I still feel a chat with a GP wouldn’t go amiss as Aely sounds quite down and maybe depressed
I do hope you didn’t see my posts as unkind they were meant to be practical as I totally understand how easy it is to slide into doing nothing
If Aely comes back maybe tell us about the sort of area you live in …small town, city, village the word town is in the title so maybe just that
Maybe make some ‘chatting friends’ on here even, that’s a start Do come back and let’s discuss what you feel you can or can’t do

I don't think, if you're feeling low, that suggesting Aely sets up groups is a valid idea. Setting up groups, even going along to one that is established, can be daunting.

Back in a minute! Emergency, DH shouting for help!

The OP is perhaps low and struggling. Their area is not the best, what few facilities there were are now crumbling.

She is exhorted to join things, set up things, be positive.

Would that it were this simple.
It takes time, it takes resilience and energy and the hide of a rhino sometimes.

Good Luck with your efforts and let us know how you get on.
Simple, easy, accessible things are sometimes easier to manage.

Thinking of you. Hope some of the kinder folk on here have given you some ideas that appeal to you.

Hope you come back to discuss the ideas.

letmein I think you are underestimating the help that is being offered here being a there there person only helps to a degree we all need a kick up the bum sometimes
I was just coming up to 70 and my job petered out my Dad died, six months later my mum died, I was very close to both and had done a lot of caring, suddenly my world was bleak I slouched around for a few months and then my daughter said mum try some volunteering, do something !!! and I so needed that kick up the bum I did and 10 years later I m still at it and loving it more than ever it keeps me alive

Dare I suggest moving to a livelier town? Maybe to an oldies’ community where you can still be independent but bump into people more easily?
All the best x

Aely I sympathise. Totally. People are so sure of themselves and quick to judge. If you could find something I'm sure you would! I just hope things change for you pet - in life things generally do change, they just sometimes take a while to get there. Sending you love xxx

Now you have drummed up our curiosity!

There are voluntary groups you can support from home, befriending people Silverline need volunteers. Similarly Butterflies bereavement support look for volunteers.
There may be something more local to you.

Can I suggest you try a U3a Course that you are not interested in🙂

I went to a Crafts day where we could spend an hour trying different things. I got there a bit late and all the things I wanted to do were full so I went to the only one that had spaces - woodwork 🙄🙁

It was so good,! They had to prize me away.

Sometimes we get stuck in a rut of what we like or don’t like. since then I’ve made a point of trying new stuff. The worst that can happen is that you’re bored!!

(Or humiliated. I don’t want to talk about the drumming sssion😬🤣😱)

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You are fond of reading, so could you join or start a Book Group. How far away is your Library? Sometimes the Librarians will order a set of books for you to get you started.
There are online Book Groups, for anyone on Facebook. A month is a reasonable time to set for reading and thinking about the set novel, or non fiction.
Good luck.

There is a wealth of advice here Aely, which you would be wise to take. Failing that, a visit to your GP maybe, as you could be suffering from depression.

Some good suggestions above.

To be fair to the OP, she has looked into a lot of things, and taken a lot of thought over things, already.

I always wondered whether I would use taxis if I was in your position.
I worked out once, that the price of running a car was equivalent to using a taxi once a week on medium journeys.

nadateturbe

Oh Aely I do sympathise. You don't sound negative too me. You sound like someone who is depressed from lack of company. I know how you feel. I think Chardy has made a good suggestion. As has Bluebelle about volunteering.
I'm wondering too, do you have a dog. They're great company and help you to have chats with others when you'out walking.

Ha ha. Having walked the dog since I posted earlier, I couldn't work out why I hadn't mentioned her. This morning I chatted to someone I see regularly and to someone I'd never before. Having a dog and a fitbit revolutionised my retirement

Good suggestions from others above, particularly volunteering and starting your own U3A group. Meeting in a cafe is a good idea, you could ask the cafe owner if there’s a quiet time, I’m sure they’d be pleased with the extra customers.
I’d also think of the suggestion to travel a bit further afield, you could use your bus pass to visit different places nearby, have a coffee or lunch, a look round and come home again. Something that can be done anytime of the year. Something that might be a step too far at the moment, might be to look at coach day trips to places of interest. They run all year and go to historic houses, botanical gardens, Christmas fairs etc.
Getting out and about to socialise is so important and you never know who you might strike a friendship with.

This is the best time of your life, truly! No deadlines, no pressure, you can play the "old lady card" which always gives you an "out". U3A has been a marvellous interest for me. I run a few courses, which are great brain P.T., and attend others, which are a blast. I decided to write a book, very tentatively, and now I'm on number 5! I spend 2 hours a day king in my garden, getting fresh air and exercise, cuddle my cats, read a lot, have coffee with my U3A pals, make jam and marmalade. I love being

I was going to suggest starting your own U3A group too, as astitchintime suggested.
It's quite easy to do.
My DM started 3 groups back in the day including a poetry reading group and portrait painting.
I am seldom bored with something every day.
I volunteer a couple of mornings. My yarn group is great for a gossip. We started it a few years ago just 3 of us and there are now about 20.

I go to 2 exercise classes and have joined the gym I may use it if there's time 🤣

I'm your age Aely and also live by myself. Please don't be bored.

I think you should address your back pain. The doctor would be my first port of call.

You know from your own experience that your town needs a social group .As others have said start one. Advertise in the local free paper, ask the editor of it to write. a piece on the group you are starting up. Get an early applicant to help by finding a venue such as the library, or a cafe with a spare room.

Email the nearest U3A and offer to group -lead a social group ,for instance knit and chat , in your own town. My daughter in law goes to a knit and chat group and she likes it a lot.

Kittylester my hobbyhorse too people totally underestimate what you get out of putting in

If you read back over your post it is totally negative everything is wrong or bad, nothing, not one positive sentence. I think the first thing to do is connect with your GP as you sound depressed to me
77 is still young (ish) you can be an old 77 or a young 77 There has been lots of good ideas on here for you but do you know what I bet you don’t do any of them because it’s easier to not (I know that I ve often had to make myself do things)

Have you got a friend ring them up now and suggest a walk or a coffee and a chat if you haven’t got a friend, make a new one go out for a walk and get chatting to anyone who you think will listen, on a bench, at a bus stop, in a shop. There’s some lovely amazing people out there My best friend went on a coach trip alone some years back sat next to a lady, started chatting and for years now she’s been her (‘second’ 😂) best friend
It requires effort though it’s much much easier to sit and do nothing it takes effort and guts to move on but you ll be so much happier

And don’t forget that voluntary work best thing since sliced bread

I will get back on my hobby horse and suggest volunteering. Or set up a social group yourself

Have you considered moving nearer to family?
You say you go to a U3A group do you chat to the people there and maybe meet up at other times. Our U3A does have a jigsaw and board games group which I understand is well attended.

I have siblings overseas too- it's a great way to see family and have a holiday!

Why not go see them? France isn't far. Or you could arrange a meet-up somewhere in between? Or you could invite them to come and see you.

I'm sure they would love to spend time with you too, why not give that a go?

I find having a future 'treat' to focus on is important, we all need something to look forward to.

Start making plans- you'll be amazed what a lift it will give you.

“The U3A has one course at a venue (in a neighbouring town) that I am able to get to and in which I have any interest”…………

Did you not know that your U3A will support you in setting up a new group? This would give you, as Group Leader, flexibility on when to hold the group. Have you also considered looking at their range of Groups and Activities?………you might find something else that inspires you.

Alternatively, why not campaign around your locality and set up a social group yourself, you can’t be the only one with time on their hands surely??