My daughter died ten days ago

And me Alie - I think about you a lot of the time. I can't imagine how you are coping with this.

for all of you Alie

Thinking of you too.

I read a deeply moving piece the other day written by Sheryl Sandberg about the loss of her husband last month at the age of 47. He was the founder of Survey Monkey and died in an accident at gym. It has been widely circulated partly because she is CE of facebook, but mainly because it has resonated with so many people.

for you alie

One day at a time. How are you today? Tomorrow will be different and so will the next and the next. The funeral will be hard but it will also be good if all of those who loved your daughter share their memories of how special she was. I cannot get your sorrow and loss out of my mind and think about you every day. I hope you soon find peace and some comfort.

Like absent, I cannot get your terrible loss out of my mind Alie. My DS told me recently of an old schoolfriend who had died suddenly, very suddenly with no warning, of a brain haemorrhage. She was only 42. Like your daughter, far too young. I think of her mother, and of you and I am overwhelmed by the sorrow you must be feeling.
You are in my thoughts so much, and will be especially tomorrow. Sending you (((hugs))) and the strength and courage to get through the day, and the days, weeks and months ahead.

I think of you too and shall be especially tomorrow.

Sending kind thoughts for tomorrow.

I hope tomorrow will be a fine day for you and your family, Alie. Distressing and comforting in equal measure, when you see tributes on flowers and hear the lovely memories they will be sharing with you

My thoughts are with you too Alie, tomorrow will be so hard for all of you. Don't try to be too strong, all that sorrow needs to come out.
(((hugs))) xxx

Love to you for tomorrow Alie XX

Thank you everybody for your good wishes.
I will manage to speak, and I will speak first, but have had to record a song for her - 'Turn Around'. I'm told it sounds ok in the church.

We are trying for a church funeral without too much God in it, mostly us and music we have chosen. The vicar is a little uncompromising, but we hope God may be mentioned and not Jesus.....most of the mourners will
be Christian but we have at least one Muslim couple.

Jayne knew a great many people in Oxford.
Me, I would have wished something much quieter and probably Humanist.
We've arranged a small quiet meet afterwards for some who feel like this...

I am going off now to get my hair cut!

Alie I hope the service is as you want it to be. I feel for you in your grief and will be thinking of you and your family tomorrow.

Dear Alie, I'm sorry I haven't been on here for a while. Been dealing with a lot of bureaucracy surrounding death of DH.

However, just want you to know you are on my mind and I hope everything goes according to plan on Friday. You will be very much in my thoughts.

Alie I'll be thinking of you tomorrow

And don't worry about the Muslims and the service - they also love Jesus!

Yes, but only as a prophet!

If they've accepted an invitation to a service in a church I'm sure they'll be fine

They have met the vicar anyway....they are sorting the music!

Just hoping 'Jesus son of God' doesn't get slipped in.......

.....we are not having any hymns.

You will be in my thoughts Alie, may you find the strength to help you through the day

Alie, the funeral isn't about the guests whatever their religion. It's about your daughter.
I'm sure no one would be so crass as to be offended.

I think we've sorted it out ok.
Just have to finish getting ready!

You know that we would be there with you if we could Alie but we will be there in spirit (note the small s )

I wish I could be there with you*Alie*. It is going to be a trial for you but I am sure it will go as you want it to, although not quite to your taste. It does sound like a good compromise. It will take courage for you to speak and I will be thinking of you a lot tomorrow.