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Snoring and bad breath ?. Am I being unkind?

(32 Posts)
carol58 Sun 27-Nov-16 09:14:11

Opinions please folks! My OH cannot breath through his nose for some unknown reason.After putting up with his twitching in bed when he can't breath, loud snoring and bad breath for ages, I've finally plucked up the courage to tell him (in the kindest possible way I could ) that I can no longer sleep with him unless he goes to GP to get it sorted. The whole situation stops me sleeping at night and I certainly don't want to be breathed on by him! He has obviously taken offence , although he says he hasn't. Am I being unreasonable?

DaphneBroon Sun 27-Nov-16 09:37:16

As someone who snores like a train I have some sympathy for your DH it is not something we want to do. I moved to a spare bedroom nearly 2 years ago to let DH get a better night's sleep (ha ha, he f*rts and is up half a dozen times in the night so I reckon honours are even)
However, more seriously, your DH may get some helpful advice from his GP. Worth a try (but try not to make it a threat, it is hurtful)

DaphneBroon Sun 27-Nov-16 09:38:12

PS suggest he sees his dentist too, the bad breath may be dental related.

carol58 Sun 27-Nov-16 10:52:02

DaphneBroon. Thanks for your reply. Yes you're quite right, he doesn't choose to snore and I do often go into a guest room in the middle of the night without waking him, so that I can get some sleep. I've spent a long time gently suggesting he could perhaps find out why he can't breath properly but to no avail. He does also have a broken tooth that he won't let the dentist remove because he's too scared and I do think that may well be the breath problem ( which by the way really foul, not just a bit smelly!) He also doesn't floss at all or even brush for very long . Much as I love him dearly and he is kind in other ways, I just don't know if I can go on living with someone who doesn't seem to care about how all this affects me.

Nelliemoser Mon 28-Nov-16 10:15:46

Look at basics, how about the state of his teeth. Does he clean his teeth and floss between his teeth? That can be a big source of bad breath.

rosesarered Mon 28-Nov-16 10:27:52

How about new twin beds in the same room? Most older people seem to snore.

squirrel5 Mon 28-Nov-16 11:09:04

My DH had similar problem, and after much "pushing" he eventually went to Dr, had swabs taken and it turned out to be a fungal infection in his sinuses, he had medication, and also referred to ENT as it was difficult to clear, and eventually had a sinus wash-out, he is much better now, less snoring and no bad breath. , perhaps this could also be a cause to carol58 husbands problem, he should go to his GP.

Sundbynitten Mon 28-Nov-16 11:13:35

Having had the problem myself, may I suggest one of the MAD gum shields for sleeping, and CB12 mouthwash, as the bad breath often is a result of the mouth drying when snoring. It solved my problems.

NemosMum Mon 28-Nov-16 11:21:57

He may well be offended Carol, but it is miserable for you, and if it continues it will be bound to change the relationship for the worse. He has a health problem which is affecting both of you and you have a valid point of view. As for the bad breath, there have been 2 members of my family with this problem, and it was dental related. Both eventually had Damascene conversions to good dental care when faced with wholesale extraction and both now have beautifully sweet breath! Action plan: go to dentist and get tooth/teeth done, buy electric toothbrush with timer and use it twice daily, rinse with Corsadyl, use Dentek flosser sticks (the back teeth ones are great). GP can refer to ENT re snoring. That is not too much to ask of someone you are spending your life with. Your husband will get over his huff! wink

Nannyflo Mon 28-Nov-16 11:45:54

I've upset my husband more times than I can remember after telling him he has bad breath!!! It's not just stale, it's really really smelly. You can actually smell it as soon as he comes in the room! I've bought him an electric toothbrush that stops when you brush for 2 minutes but NO he has a quick whiz round and that's it! I tried to encourage flossing but NO he can't be bothered! A quick poke around every now and then is all he does! Mouth washes, mints, sprays all failed to improve the smell! UNTIL a visit to the States and a trip round Walgreens! I spotted TheraBreath oral rinse on the shelf. I bought a bottle (it's not cheap) and left it on the side in the bathroom. I diplomatically told him that perhaps he should give it a go!! Mr Grumpy ignored my advise at first but then I noticed his breath was almost fragrant! I left it a few days before bringing the subject up!!! After a week his bad breath had completely disappeared. I asked him if he'd been using the TheraBreath and he admitted he had. It really is worth a try.

soldiersailor Mon 28-Nov-16 12:02:48

Some 17 years ago I was very concerned when my partner told me about my bad breath. I've never been a flosser as my teeth are too close together (I recently heard a dentist say on R4 that it's not much good anyway as long as you brush well). The dentist found no problems so I went to the GP who referred me to a specialist. I was eventually given an ultrasound check of my liver when they found something unexpected on the other side. Bowel cancer was diagnosed and an operation followed about 5 weeks later. So don't feel unkind, get it checked! The specialist was surprised as he'd never before encountered such symptoms inicating bowel cancer.

NemosMum Mon 28-Nov-16 12:41:17

Wow Soldiersailor, that's a very powerful reason to go to the doc!

Christinefrance Mon 28-Nov-16 13:00:37

Your husband is a big boy and should get over any offence when he realises you are concerned for his health. Bad breath could be a symptom of illness so needs checking out. Go for it.

Legs55 Mon 28-Nov-16 13:44:21

I know how difficult men are when it comes to visiting a GP or Dentist. My DH was very good about Dentist, regular check-ups BUT visit GP - took a lot of nagging gentle persuasion to get him to go but in the end he would go.

It's important your OH goes to either GP or Dentist, preferably GP as he may need checking for Sleep Apnoea or a host of other potential problems. Good Luck flowers

Tizliz Mon 28-Nov-16 13:51:20

for those who don't like to floss try this: water flosser I find it fantastic and use it every day

sue01 Mon 28-Nov-16 14:16:49

DH wouldn't believe he snored until there was a complaint about the noise from a chap who had the next door room in a hotel !

He was diagnosed with severe sleep apnoea and now sleeps with a mask.

This definitely needs checking... bad breath can be caused by a whole of nasties !

TriciaF Mon 28-Nov-16 14:49:42

Like Legs55 I was going to mention sleep apnoea. Friend's husband snored and lost his breath during the night. He went to the Dr. eventually and he was diagnosed with that. He has to wear a special contraption on his nose at night, but sleeps better now and feels rested in the morning.

Lewlew Mon 28-Nov-16 15:36:28

Nannyflo Thank you for the TheraBreath info, I see you can buy it here on Amazon or in Boots (won't go there ever!).

janeainsworth Mon 28-Nov-16 15:43:07

Excellent advice nemosmum except that corsodyl has to be used with care.
It stains the teeth and there have been cases of severe allergic reactions.
A better mouthwash for longterm use is peroxyl which contains hydrogen peroxide which counteracts the anaerobic bacteria that cause the bad breath.
However no mouthwash on its own is any good - the physical removal of the plaque with brushing is what matters.

busilizzie Mon 28-Nov-16 17:30:08

My husband when he was alive, never went to the dentist, and only ever had 3 toothbrushes in 25 years of marriage. He used to snore like a road drill and as we didn't have a spare room, he used to go and sleep in the caravan that was parked in the front garden. Then the neighbours complained. I lost so much sleep over the months and years I ended up with depression which he thought was funny! Not surprisingly, eventually we ended up getting divorced. He said that as he slept so well, he couldn't see what the problem was! There were other issues, but his attitude contributed a lot, as he was a heavy drinker as well!!

sluttygran Mon 28-Nov-16 18:00:30

90% of bad breath problems are due to dental issues. Basically, food gets into the tiny pockets between the teeth and under the gums, and there it decays. Just imagine having a couple of grams of rotting food stuck in your mouth - horrific! Add to this a good layer of stale plaque and dental calculus (scaling or 'tartar'), which also harbours bacteria, and no wonder there's a howling pong!
A couple of visits to a good dentist and hygienist, and possibly a good mouthwash, and the problem will disappear. Working with my dentist, I saw this problem many, many times. Mouthwash on it's own is unlikely to do the trick, although it might disguise the stink a bit.
Even more importantly, poor oral hygiene can cause all sorts of horrible diseases which I won't go into here - but heart disease and cancer are two of them.
Everyone really must go to the dentist, even if they're terrified - but there's really no need to be afraid.
Snoring is not something I can comment on - I don't think anyone has a foolproof 'one-size-fits-all' remedy, because there are so many different causes. It's very hard to live with, tho' - my late husband could keep the whole street awake!

FarNorth Mon 28-Nov-16 18:36:43

What a selfish character, busilizzie .

Ilovesummer17 Mon 28-Nov-16 21:09:28

Sluttygran that is EXACTLY spot on. Really awful bad breath comes from - usually - decaying food particles BETWEEN THE TEETH. You have to get a dental brush between the teeth. When I "forget" to use a dental brush between my teeth I get a horrible smell on the tiny tooth stick/brush like mothballs. This smell is truly awful. I then clean between my teeth with a dental brush and the result? No bad breath. You MUST do this!!

Nanna58 Mon 28-Nov-16 21:17:24

Adenoids? They can cause snoring and bad breath.

Barmyoldbat Tue 29-Nov-16 02:30:15

I had sleep apnoea and snored, I would stop breathing several times a night and once I woke up not being able to take a breathe. It was really scary. I was sent to the sleep clinic, tested and given a sleep mask to wear at night that pushes air into your airways. The first night I slept for nearly 11 hours! and my husband said he kept prodding me at night because he thought I might have died. I neve looked back, regained y energy because ofsleeping well and etting enough oxygen in my body. I then managed to lose weight and didn't need the mask anymore. Bad breathe, sounds like teeth and really needs to see dentist.