OH has fractured femur - not a good situation

Please see my PM when you have a moment.

Luckygirl Which of these is the "real" OH? Is it him who is saying please just let me go now? - or is it the paranoia? Either way his future quality of life is going to be so poor, I feel we should make the decision to go with his wishes and let him go. It is agony and feels like a huge responsibility.

My heart goes out to you Lucky. There's nothing I can say, just sending you a warm hug and caring thoughts.

Such a sad and difficult time for you all. I hope the staff are as helpful and kind as possible. Would there be a chaplain about? I mean an informed but supportive person to help you work through this awful time? Absolutely no easy answers though. Very best wishes to you and your family.

Thinking about you and all your family.

Love to you and your family. ?

No square brackets on this computer for flowers - what a difficult time for you all. You will have to trust your instincts, with the girls' support. Certainly I would not wish to force feed him against his wishes.

Hugs and xxx

Thank goodness he's been moved Lucky, I hope you at least got some sleep.
My heart goes out to you too, it's a very difficult time for you and your girls.
A big but gentle hug for you

Oh Luckygirl so sad for you , perhaps OH will need his meds adjusted for the paranoia . I felt the same when OH went off his feet and his quality of life was dismal , but when Family and some of his friends came he was much more cheerful , keeping the good side out as they say

I am afraid that sadly that is not the case here. The paranoia is pretty consistent whoever is there and it has not responded to drug therapy.

Thank you for the good wishes.

Luckygirl a very wise consultant took me to one side when my DM had a stroke after ten years with Alzheimer’s. She asked whether I wanted her admitted to a ward from A&E. She told me that treatment in hospital should be seen as a means to treat a condition, thus improving the quality of life of the patient.

She went on to say that in my mother’s case no treatment could improve her condition in a meaningful way and that in her view my DM would have a far kinder experience in her own surroundings, with the same outcome.

I thought she was hard for about a minute....and then I knew 100% she was right in this case. Mum had nothing to gain from medical interventions.

They would def. have admitted her if I’d insisted on treatment. I had to make the choice as Mum had no mental capacity by this time. I believe I did the right thing. It was the most loving thing I could do for her.

Take your time, make your choice with him at the centre of the decision. My heart goes out to you and your daughters. ?

Lucky I have tried looking at it from the other side. He has been to hell over the last week and still has not returned. That will take love, care and some drugs.

Was he paranoid before this admission? If not I would give him some more time to attempt to recover and then maybe decide with your daughters. He has had little time to rest and his drugs work since he moved wards.

{flowers] and kind thoughts

Thinking of you and your daughters lucky and wishing you all strength?

Lucky sending you hugs, love and strength. You have the love of your daughters to lean on but we are here too!!.

So sorry Lucky, I don't think you should try to second guess his wishes, there comes a time when life is unsupportable in my view. I agree with Massimo.
I hope you find strength and love with your family, take care.

Luckygirl You are surrounded by many good wishes from us all. It is so difficult to know what is best but hopefully it may become clearer in a short while. You sound like a very compassionate and sensible partner.

Luckygirl I am so sorry that DH is in such a state. It must be extremely painful for you and you daughters to see him like this and feel he is giving up. I imagine he is very weak.

I hope your instincts will guide you in to making the right decisions on his behalf and that caring support and good advice is there for you in the hospital. I am thinking of you.

Luckygirl be guided by the specialists and your heart. I am thinking of you all.

A hard day indeed lucky, I’m so sorry. Sending love and strength.

Just take a day at a time and see how the week unfolds. Wishing you courage ,strength , love and peace.x

This is so difficult for you Lucky, just when you thought things were going to be a tiny bit easier. I'm so sorry you find yourself in this situation. Sending you love and wishes for the strength to make the right decision

Thinking of you luckygirl

He was slightly less paranoid this evening and talked of knowing he was going to die and wanting to come home first. I do not know how this can be organised but will try and see what can be done.

The last thing he said to me as I left was "I wish we could do it all over again." It is such an emotional rollercoaster and I am so exhausted - I have no idea how I managed to drive home from the hospital.

Thank you all for your support.

Lucky,