OH has fractured femur - not a good situation

Oh Luckygirl, that brought tears and actually you are very, very lucky to have loved and been loved by a man who would like to do it all over again.

(((Hugs)))

You are indeed lucky to be able to have had your conversation today. These moments of lucidity will mean the world to you in months to come.
But at a practical level, do ask to see the Palliative Care Consultant at your hospital.
There is much that can be done for you both to improve your DH’s quality of life andondeed your own. You do not have to cope with this alone.

I agree with what Tuppnce says, you do need to see the Palliative Care Consultant. To see what help he can be given. Not sure if it is still the same as when I nursed palliative patients but priority was given to patients, such as your dh, so that they could be at their place of choice (whether that is hospital, hospice or home). As he says he wishes to go home this should be prioritised and there should be a care agency, with both qualified nurses and health care assistants, who can take on care for patients at home at very short notice. The district nursing service can also provide support and help, should it be needed.
I reiterate what has been said before, please look after yourself, as I know it can be very easy to put all your energy into caring for a loved one and forget to look after yourself.
For you, prayers and ? xx

Both you and your husband and are in my thoughts, Lucky.

Mine, too Lucky x

Have you tried Marie Curie?

www.mariecurie.org.uk/help

Thinking of you.

Luckygirl, I’m sad to read your last post but so pleased that you were able to have that bit of conversation with your husband. What a tribute to the value he places on your marriage and a comment to keep in your heart. Thinking of you

That's a very moving tribute Lucky. As Bagatelle has said up-thread, perhaps you might contact Marie Curie, who offer a 'hospice care at home' service.

Lucky what a lovely man your OH must be.
I hope you both have the support and care you need and deserve.

lucky .

How lovely and how sad, lucky.

Lucky you will always remember that wish xx

Lucky I am so moved by your very articulate post.Please make a formal complaint as I did when my husband's care was abysmal.A full investigation took place and an apology was received.Unless enough people complain about poor treatment nothing will change.I kept a diary of poor practice and had correct dates and times which helps.Hope things improve for your H and that you gat enough support.

What a lovely man Mr Lucky sounds and what a loving thing to say.
As Tuppence said its time to talk to the Palliative Care Team, my friend recently was given help with her husband by such a team and cannot speak highly enough of their care and compassion.

Thinking of you, Luckygirl.

Yes, so am I (flowers) and hugs.

Luckygirl I have just read your post and it brings me to tears. I also brought my DH home for palliative care. MacMillan, Marie Curie, our local hospice at home and the community nurses supported us.
Sending the biggest hug and

What a lovely thing for your DH to have said Luckygirl - something to hold in your heart for ever

Luckygirl I can only echo what others have said. What a lovely man your DH is. So wonderful that he enjoyed your life together so much that he could do it all again.
I wish you strength in the days to come.

Thank you.

I have been bombarded with all sort of calls today. It seems the plan is that he will come home with 2 carers 4 times a day - I could not get an answer as to who will provide this or who would pay (but as an ex-SW I think I have that in hand); but I did get an answer as to what might happen if he needed his bowels open between carer visits and was told "He will just have to wait." Hmmmmm.

He is mostly in bed as he cannot hold himself up in a chair - but we have a riser/recliner that I bought him so hopefully we can make him comfortable on that. I just want him home here where we know his likes/dislikes and little foibles - he was less paranoid today which was a huge relief - but very uncomfortable. He just wants to be in bed - and if that is what he wants, then that is what he shall have.

The district nurses will come in and people will help me to pop put now and again as I know I will need a break sometimes.

Consultant does not know how long this will all last, but he wants to be here, so we will make it happen.

And your caring for him in this way is why he would do it all again, lucky.

Don't forget we are here for you!

Lucky I am sure he will be so much more content in his own surroundings and getting food that he likes and when he wants it.

Hopefully there will be continuity of care and he will not see strange faces each visit.

You still have to look after yourself, with us lot nagging you to do it.

That sounds like a good solution Lucky. In my experience the carers are paid for by Social Services at least for the first 6 weeks.
I am sure both you and he will feel happier when he is home and it sounds like you are getting support.

Thinking of you Lucky and hoping that you can get DH home where he is comfortable.

Luckygirl your OH should be eligible for NHS Continuing Care Funding. I hope his discharge goes well and he will soon be settled in his own surroundings.