OH has fractured femur - not a good situation

Oh Lucky , words fail ..............

Hope the doctor has arrived. As the district nurse says he needs to go to AE. If the doctor does not arrive soon ring for ambulance and insist he goes in because of the obstruction. He has been in pain for how long? Threaten with legal action if necessary.
Best wishes, Lucky girl.

Bloody hell, lucky, no one would believe that if you wrote it. Your poor dh and definitely poor you.

Keep us posted!

Ye Gods, words certainly fail me Lucky

'Farce' - yes, isn't it! But it's not funny, and potentially tragic. I hope a doctor did turn up, listened and acted accordingly.

I'm so sorry lucky, hope the doctor has been and is sensible. Would one of your family have enough energy for an official complaint? Sending love to you both.

Luckygirl I should not be writing this on an open forum but here goes. If God forbid the same happens again, ring 999, state where he is getting pains but not the cause of them. Tell the ambulance crew the possible cause when they arrive and actually see the state he is in.

To think there is another BH at the end of this month. I do realise that people may only be unwell at certain times and BHs are not part of them.

Please look after yourself if that is possible.

It is hard to believe that of all the experts out there there isnt one who knows what to do. I would certainly dial 999 and get your DH into hospital where they should be able to sort this out. Shocking that the district nurse cannot help. They are amazing in our area and come out on Bank Holidays and Sundays.
I do hope the doctor has now been and sorted your DH out.

Lucky, how are things now ?

Doc arrived and removed massive faecolith from rectum - a very messy and uncomfortable procedure - apparently since 2018 this is a medical procedure and a nurse cannot do this. He also administered another phosphate enema which we are of awaiting results. Thankfully carer has just arrived and will deal with the aftermath and help to change the bed, - whole place smells like a sewer. OH has no sense of smell - lucky man.

Doc does not feel there is any obstruction further up the system thank goodness.

OH's pain now much reduced.

Good for that doc! - but should it have been such a tortuous process to get it sorted?

^ or is there some serious flaw in this system!?^

There is.
and God forbid anyone should be ill at a weekend or a Bank Holiday.

Oh dear, poor DH and poor you
Well done to the carer too.

That's must be a releif all round - in all senses.

So glad to hear this news. If OH refuses to take an aperient would he eat prunes or drink prune juice? Or could you crush Sennakot tabs and add them to something? Sometimes you have to be devious.
Hope you both sleep well.

Thank goodness it's dealt with for now. Maybe it'll be flagged up on his records and the situation will get more attention in future.

It was probably a relief too!

This is beyond ridiculous. Your poor OH, he must have been so uncomfortable. And poor you, Lucky.

I want to say this really can't go on, but realistically, it probably will...

And people wonder why I think I am going mad - is it me, or is there some serious flaw in this system!?

Luckygirl I am tearing my hair out for you!!

I am so angry on your behalf, and your circumstances must make all of us (getting on in age) fearful of what may happen should we find ourselves caring for elderly loved ones. I did it years ago, for over three years. for my mother, and at the time I know I was fuming because only a diagnosis of terminal cancer seemed to get us any proper and timely help for her. If someone at home is conscientious and reliable they are allowed to carry on caring with minimum assistance. If and when they report problems and distress the system is either very slow or it fails. It really isn't good enough

Your circumstances are dire Luckygirl and you must let people know that (with the best will in the world) you are not up to giving your OH the amount of care that is needed.

It is deplorable that you are being left to do this with minimum assistance and when there is an emergency like a bowel obstruction the system sends signals all round the houses but nothing actually happens to alleviate the problem! It is incompetence beyond belief! The situation is passed from pillar to post.

It really is a very shabby system when care is not immediate. Your OH is frail, agitated, in pain, yet it seems getting the medical care he so desperately needs will only happen if you call for an ambulance.

I am so angry on your behalf. There has to be a better monitoring system for those with nursing needs discharged from hospital to home. I am appalled by the slack and useless system you have encountered - long term , since your OH's operation. It's is negligent.

I'll catch up with the rest of the posts now. I am so sorry you are going through this. Do all in your power (yet another uphill struggle though ) to get that break you so richly deserve.

Oh dear! Am so sorry you and your OH are having to go through all this hassle. If anyone reading this thinks that Luckygirl's situation is unusual, I can say that it unfortunately isn't, and unless you experience first hand the farce that is laughingly referred to as "community care" nowadays you couldn't believe it. Is there any med he is able to take Lucky to prevent a replay of the situation?

Where does the buck stop, with community care? Just wondering, because nobody seems accountable.

It seems all problems are passed on and carers have to be persistent (even when tired and stressed out) and knowledgeable as well as somewhat forceful/articulate to be listened to. Even then the response is shamefully lacking.

oh my, just catching up as been away to Leamington for a few days. What a ** nonsense and so awful for you all. Hope the B situation (no not that B) ... will be taken seriously and kept ‘moving’ now they realise how quickly things go wrong. Hugs xxx

The medical staff must be aware of the problems that people with Parkinson's have with bowel movements and neither of you should have had to go through all that.

Perhaps your GP surgery needs to be shown this thread and see exactly how your DH's care is lacking and how you are struggling.

I agree with everything Day6 says and I feel very on your behalf too.

It makes alarming reading and one wonders how many other families are dealing with such trauma just to get a loved one in pain treated promptly with compassion and dignity. Yes, it certainly makes one fearful of being in a similar predicament.

It's very wrong and should be reported to the health care authorities and to the political decision makers, but poor Luckygirl is exhausted from the fight, how can she take on a battle? She would need a PA to catalogue the neglect of her DH's care and the shocking lack of support she has endured.

I'm sure we are all angry about the way she has had to shoulder the bulk of the caring for her OH. Perhaps we can let our MPs know of our alarm at the state of the NHS as experienced by people like our friend Lucky and that it's about real people who are struggling to provide nursing care for loved ones at home, not merely an exercise in economics. It's shameful and I would be embarrassed for other nations to know that this is how we care for the sick in this country.

Luckygirl perhaps we should rename you Pluckygirl because boy have you shown some backbone throughout this awful time, especially as you have been in pain too. Warmest wishes. x

I’m delighted the GP was able to resolve the obstruction and your husband is more comfortable lucky but have a deep sadness at the lack of care, understanding and compassion. Angry? Of course as you must be although my overriding feeling is that of helplessness. I hope today proves a lighter and less worrying day for you both.

Words fail me Luckygirl I can't believe the NHS is reduced to this..
I wish I could help but can only hope things settle down for you both. Take any opportunity you can for a rest and change of scenery, you need to recharge your batteries to keep caring for your partner.

Luckygirl I just read the recent developments and I am so sorry you and your poor DH had to go through with this. A similar situation happened to my mother in law, luckily for everybody she was in hospital at the time. Just wonder why the nurses let a patient go 9 days without giving an enema! Hope things improve a little now