Dealing with constant health problems

RedRidingHood I am juggling 8 different illnesses, some pretty serious so, like you, I can feel fed up.

What has really helped me is that I found a closed Facebook Group for people suffering from my rare pancreas disease, and it's been great to share posts with others who understand exactly. We have given each other advice, propped each other up and ranted if necessary, and shared all our medical problems relating to the pancreas.

I think it would really help you if you decided what is your priority illness and find a closed FB group you can apply to join. Then you won't feel that you're boring your husband and friends, but bottling it all up won't do you any good at all.

Although the closed groups are on FB, they are private and can't be accessed by non-members.

Good luck.

Thanks Sparkle that sounds like a good idea. I haven't got a full diagnosis yet for the latest issue but it's looking like the worst so far as well as being quite unusual and I've had weeks of anxious waits for tests so far. Once I know what it is talking to others would be helpful.

If it's arrhythmia that's also bothering you, try and not worry too much about it as very many, particularly as you get older, suffer from it. Some can be almost cured with ablation/cauterisation of the affected part of the heart, a local procedure whereas others such as myself rely on medication. I was diagnosed with it in 2006 although I knew I had it many years before and I'm still here 20 odd years later.
The more anxiety you have, the more you'll notice the arrhythmias so get your other problems sorted before you worry about that.
I understand it's a nuisance when you get one bally thing after another and I wish you well.x

Red I have learnt loads about my own condition from the FB group I'm on. Even my GP admits that I know more than he does now, and his words were "There's nothing like speaking to people who actually suffer the same condition".

You might want to join a couple - one for each main illness. People who join the group I am on tend to heave a sigh of relief in their first post, saying thank goodness they have found other people who are suffering the same. (This is the problem with having quite a rare illness!)

The old saying "Birds of a feather flock together" is very apt.

Again, GN working at its very best level Sparklefizz such a help to the OP I’m sure. x

Urmstongran x

EllanVannin I had a lot of anxiety and problems over the last year or two with the arrhythmia not to mention hospital admissions but it's largely under control now, although I am waiting for an ablation.
It just feels like I get one thing under control (or learn to live with it) and then something new is thrown at me. All the while having a stupid rash that wakes me up itching, an eye problem and last year a broken ankle.

I completely sympathise with you as I am in the same boat. I seem to get everything going and suffer with asthma and chest problems. I've also had quite a variety of other health issues over the past few years (I'm in my mid 50's) most of which are not connected to each other. I don't work, but if I did I would imagine I would be on a disciplinary for all the time I would have had to take off and my house is not as clean and tidy as it should be as I'm so tired all the time. My weight has sky rocketed because when I'm like this I'm too tired to cook. My husband works long hours so we live on take aways. Even when I do try to diet and eat healthily I don't seem to lose weight (I also have PCOS). I feel like I'm a waste of space sometimes and it's made me anxious about leaving the house. I have a lovely DH and family and friends, but my health is getting me down.

Have a look at "Olive Leaf Extract " ...excellent herb ...anti inflammatory ...antiviral.....anti bacterial ...great all rounder and very safe and good for the heart !!

I now know by reading this that I am not alone with RA heart anxiety and other problems. So tired and down a lot of the time as not always easy to get out and about. Used to teach people re RA through a course set up by arthritis charity. It can help a lot. Don’t know if it is still run. It is always good to speak to people in the same boat. Husband says he understands but sometimes conveniently forgets.

On Facebook, I belong to several groups that help--Psoriasis, Diabetes, and Herniated Discs !! Also had heart attacks, have. 12 stents, and had a mild stroke! I think us older ladies tend to "get on with it"- and yes , my husband has said "there's always something wrong with you" once or 100 times!! Getting understanding and advice from others in same boat is invaluable x

I know how you feel Red my poor DH had to listen to 8 years of moaning. But I think the deal is 'for better or worse. In sickness and in health'.

Maybe you feel for him, but unless he has said so, he may not mind and wouldn't want you to feel worse because you bottle up your feelings of worry and frustration at your health issues.

Mine has seen me in floods of tears many a time and he listened patiently and made all the right noises. He is in good health so it must be tedious. He was also an absolute star when I really needed a lot of help during chemo and other times like visiting me in hospital, bringing the things I needed and keeping the house afloat in my absence. No mean feat as we had a houseful at that time.

He had only just retired when I was diagnosed too. So didn't get the retirement he had worked so hard for. He became a carer within a month of retiring. Poor sod. I am forever in his debt. He never complained once.

Maybe still confide in him from time to time but take some of the great advice above too and join a group where others can empathise because they are going through the same thing.

Only thing I would say is, if it's possible, try to take your mind of it when you can. I often felt more dragged down if I wallowed in it (and boy could I wallow!) but often became quite lifted when my GD's were here or I managed to get out with friends.

With the serious lung problem to deal with and no results yet you will be unable to do that and need support. I so hope your results are the best news possible under the circumstances

I have alot of health issues. I suffer with depression and anxiety. It annoys me when others who don't have these problems think you are being awkward or unsociable when you have to say you will have to cancel a meeting etc. Youdo get fed up of talking about these issues sometimes l say l'm ok even if l'm not

I am alone ,as widowed 10 years ago, and I have found it very helpful to join a closed Facebook group for my ‘hidden disability’ .(a stoma) .It really eases the associated problems to be able to ‘talk’ to those in the same or a similar position .There are also local support groups for my problem ,held at the hospital where I had an operation last year,so there maybe groups for some or all of your problems Red Riding Hood.

Oh Red I do feel for you but as Sparkelfizz and others have said FB or other on-line groups are really worth joining.

I have Pernicious Anaemia and had lots of symptoms that I din't know were associated with PA until I joined a couple of groups. I've had so much help, support and been given great information that has made such a difference.

You'll get support and understanding here on GN because many of us manage health issues but getting in touch with people who are dealing with very similar issues is such a relief and may give you ideas of how to better manage your daily life.

Wishing you the best of luck and hope you are having a good day today.

I also have been unwell with this and that over the past year, and my DH dreads asking me how I am every morning. I also feel bad about telling friends how I am, in case they think I'm always moaning. I've also been diagnosed with a rare pancreas condition, Sparklefizz, and would be interested to hear what website you've found helpful. My best wishes to you, I know how you feel.

I took ill on Saturday night with shivering, stomach pains and the runs. On Sunday DH asked if I fancied a trip to the seaside. He was put out when i said I wasn't up to going. I needed something from the shop and he made me go in while he sat in the car. Then on Sunday evening he caught my bug. He was shivering, vomiting and generally making a huge deal of being ill! I said there was no need to make such a fuss about it. He was shivering but it was a bit put on. I had to fetch him a blanket and drinks etc., Today he's taken to his bed while I've been doing the washing etc., Sorry for venting. Your message just made me feel a bit fed up.

I don’t know if healthunlocked.com would be any use, it offers information and support.

CazB I have sent you a PM.

I don't often tell people how I truly am when they ask. They don't really want to know all the details so I don't even tell the children (AC). I've been ill for nearly 30 years with M.E. and now have a number of other illnesses as well. Many friends have never known me well and even my son can hardly remember the "old me".

There's an elderly lady at my Art Group who always has something wrong and will go on and on about it. I could easily trump her ailments but frankly I go to Art to forget about them, and if I am honest I don't really want to hear an awful lot about hers. I know that sounds unsympathetic and I am not generally but she makes me feel that way. I wouldn't want to do the same to my own friends and family

I have recently been diagnosed with breast cancer. I am on medication which hopefully will shrink it although not much sign of that at the moment. If people ask me how I am I say fine as nobody really wants to hear how you really are. I can’t express my worries to my DH and DC because they are worried too.
I tried joining closed FB groups but some people on there are in a bad way and none are on the same medication as I am.
It makes you feel very isolated.

I have lots of health problems and I think my hubby gets fed up with it sometimes but he has health problems too. He has M.E and was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis last year. At the time it was scary but he has since been told it’s stable. I. Hope you get your lung problem sorted out too

I have a long term health issue that really limits my life and my poor DH has had to take early retirement to help me. What I found really useful was to see a counsellor once a week (I ended up doing it for nearly a year, and still pop back occasionally). I used the time to unload, or vent my frustrations, or be enabled to see things a bit differently, or even to come up with alternative strategies for how I was doing things. It meant that I didn't have to unload onto my husband, or friends but I had that space once a week that was entirely for me. Yes, it costs money (although most counsellors have a "sliding scale" of fees for those on a lower income) but in terms of my close relationships, it was more than worth it. Would definitely recommend it.

I also have a number of serious disabling health issues. I don't want to be a moaner or be boring about my health so I have joined a FB closed group and channel most of my worries through there. I also find it helpful to me to be supportive in return to others through that group.

I think though that anyone close to you like a DH really could be more sympathetic or supportive.
After all you don't have these problems by choice!

Being ill all the time is really tough you certainly have my sympathy