Anxiety and stress

I think you have answered your own question lucky which was that you should have gone in, but you were looking out fir your friends. How lovely the people waited and tried to help. That was kind.
You have had so much on recently don’t be hard on yourself and hope you enjoyed the show after all that stress.

No, not really as it was a WI show, so crowded and hot that I just wanted to leave! You wouldn’t think there were so many people in the world, to your left and right and dodging about. I was just too upset. Stupid woman that I am!

I sympathize Luckylegs. My anxiety has got totally out of hand after some horrible life events. I get physical symptoms - feeling sick, tight feeling in my head, shaking, scared of absolutely everything. Nothing is enjoyable. I've had medication which didn't work and advice on here which made me feel I was not alone. I've always been nervous due to my childhood but it's got much worse. Maybe relaxation tapes or yoga may help you. I hope you manage to feel better.

You are not stupid.

Luckyleg I'm the same everyone of my threads is health related! I can relate with your anxiety symptoms, as I said before I don't know which comes first, the physical ones or the anxiety! I too get that awful feeling of dread for want of a better description and like yourself I've often blamed a virus but now I'm not so sure!

You saying the consultant said you seemed to be anxious, reminded me of my birthday this year when family took me for a meal. A lady at the next table asked whose birthday it was. I told her it was mine. She said you look nervous. It is embarrassing.

luckylegs YES you can and should phone at 8 am and ask for an appointment. It sounds as if you really do need it. I reached the point you are at, having had lots of people ask if I was all right. I put on a brave face - or thought I did. Please phone tomorrow first thing. You may be offered talking therapy or a short course of medication. Remember your mental health is just as important as your physical health. Good luck with your appointment and I wish you well.

I have a lovely life, there is no obvious reason for this and I feel I am ‘lacking’ somehow in that I give into it and cry very easily. Thank you for your replies which show you understand how it is. I do feel sick, my stomach is in knots, tears are in my eyes for the slightest thing, I am envious of those lucky people who seem to not worry about things. Anyway, I will have to see a doctor soon and see how I get on. I will investigate relaxation tapes, that sounds good. I used to be a yoga teacher, believe it or not but I got too anxious about getting up in front of a class!

Luckylegs, it sounds like you were just trying too hard to help others and ignoring your own needs and comfort. Try to be a lot kinder to yourself - you deserve it.

You are quite entitled to ring the doctor at 8 am for a same day appointment if you are feeling unwell, so just do that and arrange some more CBT.

I’ve just had a look at Patient Access where new appointments have been placed and the first one is 22 October! I can’t possibly wait that long so I’ll definitely have to ring in the morning, I have no choice!

Luckylegs, do remember that those people you believe are so confident and self-assured may in fact hiding the same feelings of anxiety that you are experiencing - but doing a very good job! I do hope you get help soon from your G.P. I found that retirement from a hectic job left me feeling anxious and I worried about the smallest thing, such as a dental appointment. As our stomachs are referred to as our second brains, no wonder everything in our heads goes to our tums! I have found meditation very helpful, and hope you find what you need.

Been to the doctors, he thinks I’ve got moderate to severe anxiety. Thinks I would benefit from CBT but it’s about six months to access but as he says I’ve been like this for 70 years, it won’t go away in six months so worth getting on waiting list. He’s also prescribed Sertraline which I’m terrified about. He says I’ll be on it for at least six months, any side effects are worst in the first week so will I persist please. He thinks the whole dizziness, virus etc might all be due to the anxiety! I went to try and find a book on mindfulness in the library but couldn’t find anything today so I’ll google it. When I can get back to my usual classes I think I’ll feel a lot better. Thank you for your helpful replies, so comforting when you’re panicking.

We are all responsible for our own happiness. It's taken me a long time to learn this. You didn't have to save a space for them. If they needed a space there would have been a disabled parking area, in all probability. I suggest you start being more self aware, and maybe more self focussed, doing things for yourself that you like doing. Through the day, ask yourself how you are feeling as you do various things. How long do you spend doing stuff just for you, "me" time?

Luckylegs, I'm sorry you're having such a tough time.

I'm currently reading The 4 Pillar Plan by Dr Rangan Chatterjee which I got from the library. I think you might find it helpful. It's very readable and practical, and he talks a lot about the very real effects stress has on the body when we're not prioritising our own well being. He also does a podcast which is called Feel Better, Live More with Dr Rangan Chatterjee.

Poor you Luckylegs your anxiety is affecting your quality of life.

2 things.

Someone I know uses a free app called ‘Headspace’ and thinks it’s wonderful for anxiety. After 3 months it’s £60 a year but she happily pays it as it’s so good. (You do not have to sign up to it though if you choose not to).

A friend went to see her doc and got referred for CBT. The list was about 3 months but she got asked by that service if she would be happy to attend a group therapy as the wait was only 4 weeks. She said she’d give it a try (she was apprehensive) but she said it was great! Very supportive and kind and actually felt more ‘normal’ knowing she wasn’t suffering on her own.

I wish you WELL. x

Just remembered - one of the things the therapist said was that there are patches of blue sky in amongst the grey clouds. She found that comment soothing.

Thanks for your suggestions. I really don’t do what I want a lot of the time, a people pleaser I suppose. Well, not much at the moment as I haven’t been getting out at all because of the dizziness.

The annoying thing is this friend has suffered from mental health issues herself and yet they laughed at me for attempting to help them. We’ve only just got back to normal after falling out in January and probably due to the stress I was under yesterday (daft as it was I realise) I don’t feel very friendly towards her again!

I am going to get that app and that book as soon as I can.

I would of felt the same too. I think it’s also because we’ve come across the no parking space scenario so many times that we anticipate it and wait for it to happen. It sounds like you were trying so hard to please people, I had a consultant say the same to me I put him in his place as it was prior to three biopsies on my private’s so I said anyone would be like this two hours past their appointment time I was furious so to make a judgement at an appointment is silly. I self referred for cbt with the NHS she was a lovely lady and it did help me. I now try to think of myself more as sometimes we people please too much x

I hate it when doctors say it's because you're anxious when you present with real physical symptoms they can't explain.
I paid to see a private counsellor and it helped move me on from my desperate state of mind but I don't think it completely cures you.

I would try the breathing exercises recommended for anxiety. Look it up, it's briefly 4 seconds in, 8 out, 4 in.
Go back through what you were taught in CBT. Life is too short to waste it worrying about small issues like parking. Having a terminal illness makes you realise that, dont waste what you have. Worrying is a wasted emotion because it achieves nothing.

I think you need to focus on you , rather than other people . Go with the flow and don't try to over think things .

Luckylegs like yourself I feel I would benefit from some medication and yet I would be worried about taking it. I know if I don't want to help myself then I can't be helped! It's a vicious circle.

My gd suffers with anxiety it’s can be quite hard for me to watch at times she puts herself down too. Recently she met a nice guy and she has been slightly better they have got a dog and I think because of the responsibility of looking after her
She is not overthinking too much.
Not saying you should get a dog but maybe a bit of gentle yoga will help. Or deep breathing exercise, does help I
Think a lot of us suffer with some anxiety and I find that helps.
Think about yourself and not so much of others that was a lesson I learned. Overthinking things is another thing that brings on anxiety too.

just to say, yes you do need to see gp before 22nd October. I always find, rather than phoning my gp I take myself along early in the day, soon after they open, and ask the receptionist for an appointment. may not be that day, but certainly I usually get one within the week. good luck.

I was going to say the same BusterTank -
Try to be realistic - I have suffered mental health issues for years which has left me with severe anxiety. But I take every thing in my stride and as this is an illness I have had to learn to look after myself.
Yes therapies help but you need to put some work in yourself.
Know your own boundaries - as much as it's nice and thoughtful - don't take on looking for a parking space because that only stressed you out and sets you up to pick up on every thing negative about the event.

There maybe something in your past that is causing this anxiety - so talking therapy may be good. Look at your diet, so you have too much caffeine? Too much wine/drink? Sweet stuff?

Try to take time out ten minutes a day to do some meditation and repeat some positive affirmatives.
Most of all you will be ok. Take care