Just had bad news

I can only cry with you, hug you, and pray

So terribly sad, Craftycat. I can’t find words that won’t sound trite, but sending so much sympathy and wishing you all strength. Life can be so very cruel and unfair. xx

I agree readymeals.

So sorry Craftycat. Very big hugs to you and your family.

How awful for all of you - wishing you the very best support and love to get you through xx

This is very sad but do hang on in there. A great deal of research is ongoing and much progress has been made. All is NOT lost and cancers have already been treated and even cured.

Try to contact a local cancer group, like Cancer Research UK, talk to people who know about the cancer type your DiL has and check on progress.

That is so sad . I'm so sorry to hear this.
I'm told that Macmillan nurses are very helpful, and supportive, on how to break the news to the children.

Life can be so cruel at times. My heart goes out to all of you who are struggling with this devastating illness which has such a ripple effect within families. My own husband died of cancer at 36, just after my daughter was born, and I remember how helpless everyone felt (including me!), and how hard it was for my parents and family trying to support me and the baby whilst dealing with their own grief. I was so grateful for practical help - I didn’t have to ask, meals were brought, baby was looked after, and it’s this sort of thing which will keep you going too as you will just want to feel useful. You will get through this - we have no choice other than to deal with what life throws at us - but allow yourself time to wallow in the sadness when you need to, it will give you strength to face what’s ahead. As someone else said, make lovely memories, that’s important. I work in a hospice and our staff help patients to make memory boxes for their children - that might be something for the future. Stay hopeful. Big hugs.

I am overwhelmed by all your messages of love & support.
Thank you everyone so much.
Having slept on it I am feeling more positive today- yes they are making huge strides in cancer treatment & she is a very positive person- she was also just bowled over by the news as was my son.
He has just booked a week's holiday for them all- they have never taken the children out of school before- not even for a day- so school were very supportive. They know the situation & have been wonderful keeping an eye on the children to make sure they are OK. They had to cancel their holiday last year because of her treatment.
We will get through this as we are a strong, close family & we all love her very much.
She could have years still & by that time the treatments will have improved too.
It's time for some positive thinking to support her as much as we can.
My sincere thanks to you all.

Cyber hugs from me...
so many words of wisdom and comfort here, I wish you well too.

So very sorry to hear this, it’s such an awful thing to happen to any family. I was a Marie Curie nurse so spent a lot of years caring for people with cancer. The medics are giving you all the information they can on your daughter in laws type of cancer. That doesn’t mean this won’t pan out quite differently. I have a friend whose niece had stage 3 breast cancer, practically all her lymph nodes involved, double mastectomy....that was 12 years ago. She is fine and cancer free...that wasn’t what her consultant expected. I also have a friend with a brain tumour....was benign now malignant. The kind of tumour would suggest less than a year...she is three years on and in remission...very, very unusual. The thing is, people sometimes concentrate on the fact they are dying....but they should concentrate on the fact they are living. There are many support organisations out there, lots for your daughter in law...with other people in the same boat. Ditto for your husband and grandchildren who can over time be gently prepared. Being a supportive family is fabulous for them. Try and keep positive, try to smile, no breaking down in front of any of them. It’s important to keep them buoyant, dealing with teary relatives would be impossible. Good luck, please look at the support out there...ask your own GP practice.

So sorry, Craftycat. Lots of kind words on here.

It’s impossible to know what to do or say, but I think that it is important that they all know that you are always there, and will listen whenever they want to talk.

Just sending you a big hug... I’m so sorry... I just don’t know what to say. You and your family will be in my thoughts.

I am happy that you are feeling more positive today Craftycat. Life is such a lottery. Sending you every best wish possible.

What devastating news for you all, Sending love and hugs to your family at this time xx

So sad to hear your news, but glad you are feeling more positive today. You and all your family are in my thoughts and prayers at this difficult time. Sending love.

I am so sorry that you have had this devstating news. I know it often doesn't help to hear about others but two people in our family have hit rock bottom - one described as being as ill as he could be without dying - and both have come back from this to lead reasonable lives. A colleague has had gene therapy and is now unrecognisible as the skeletal creature he was a few months ago. What I am trying to say is that research goes on constantly, and perhaps in a year or so there may be something new that can help her. I do hope so. Take heart . xx

I am so sorry to hear your devastating news Craftycat . Sadly I don’t have anything to say that will make you feel any better but I do echo what others have said . In recent times of sorrow and darkness I have gained great strength from being able to share and offload onto my virtual friends on Gransnet and whilst there is nothing practical we can do we are always here to listen .

I hope and pray the doctors are able to stabilise your DDIL for as long as possible . Wishing you and your family much strength and love in the days ahead xx

Cancer does not necessarily have to be terminel. There are many cures for it, in three areas of the worlsd no-one has it because of a particular mineral in the soil. There are many approaches, look at The Gerson Institute, for example, look at the more sensible complimentary approaches. Diet can eliminate cancer andprevent it entirely. Cancer cells cannot survive in a health body, that is what our immune system is designed for. Please do some research, and my hopes go with you.

Sending kindest thoughts to you and your family

So very sad and my thoughts and prayers are for you and your family.
Try and keep strong I know it's hard
Sending you comforting hugs x

I am so very sorry from the bottom of my heart. You must take each day as they come and count them as a blessing to be enjoyed. My sister has an aggressive form of Motor Neurons Disease and we were told that she would not see christmas this year, she has and New Year. We take each day as it comes and we all enjoy life to the full including her, she has good days and bad. Dont tell the children yet and the Cancer Care team will always help when the time comes to tell them. Enjoy life and take each day as a blessing. Xxx

There are simply no adequate words to console you, but you and your family are in my thoughts. My only advice; really live each moment you have together, don't look ahead and treasure the memories you will be making together for your grandchildren.

How awful for you. My sister had cancer too and was given a similar diagnosis but she lived with cancer for almost another 10 years and lived well. There are new drugs and treatments being discovered every month so please be optimistic. Her 10 years were difficult at times but mostly really good and she holidayed and enjoyed herself to the full.